Brenda’s Blog – October 28, 2014

Patient’s wife to nurse: “We’ve been married 71 years and we love each other very much.” Family member to nurse: “They would have been married 75 but he had to wait 4 years for her to get out of jail.” The goal was levity, but the result was a marked silence.

Sitting in the waiting room of the cardiac care unit provides ample material for thought and blogging. It also reminds me of the way human nature displays itself during crisis and tension.

Humor is the great social lubricant. We use it to share joys and to reduce stress. Art Linkletter made a fortune regaling the American public with his “Kids Say The Darndest Things!” Kids are not the only ones, are they? But just as my Mom said, “There is a time and place for everything.”

A local leader uses humor to spur others to action, but his sarcasm merely draws negative reactions. How we use this tool is an important element in successful interpersonal relationships. A study done of top executives listed “sense of humor” as one of the common attributes. A well-developed, well-honed appropriate use of stories and laughter can create a more favorable work environment just as a biting tongue can stifle creativity and collegiality.

Proverbs tells us, “A merry heart does good like a medicine.” Medical data shows patients with a congenial attitude and positive expectations recover more quickly. And, a warm smile and laughter create a friendly bond between staff and patient. But off-color or snide remarks certainly serve as negative warnings.

The dismayed young man who could not understand why his Mother-in-Law didn’t appreciate his bedside humor learned about the timing of witty comments. Hopefully, he has learned when and when not to joke!

The masterful use of humor aids in a winsome, winning personality.

Brenda’s Blog – October 14, 2014

“What a beautiful Colorado winter day – let’s go play!”

We moved to Pagosa Springs from Arizona. In the first year we joined the other “flatlanders” (the not-so-favorable phrase for Texans and Arizonans) who saw the clear blue skies and ran headfirst into playtime.

It took us an entire season to understand the correlation between gorgeous winter days and the storm which was surely coming behind. On those days when tourists from non-mountainous areas romped, the locals ran errands, loaded in food, filled vehicles with gas, and prepared. Prepared for what? BAD WEATHER!

They knew after years of experience that those beautiful, unseasonably warm days were precursors to heavy snows. By year two, we left the tourists behind and joined the lines at the grocery and gas station.

Years later during my own personal storm, I remembered this experience and saw great similarities. There were days when my mind was perfectly clear and the stress level seemed to disappear. My first reaction was to play. YAY! Then I thought back to Pagosa. Hmmmm.

Could these days of clarity be given for preparation? Could play take a back seat?

I began using those “sunny winter moments” to do paperwork, make phone calls, and organize my thoughts because I knew an emotional storm was coming when I wouldn’t be able to handle things as well. It made that time manageable and helped me mature.

Generations ago used to say, “Make hay while the sun shines!” There is certainly time for recreation, but in stormy times, the sun shine may be better used for hay-making.

“PERSONALITY AT ALL TIMES”

The plain card placed above the carry-out window caught my eye. It contained the rules for the employees who worked the drive through. The poster was non-descript without even a company logo or interesting typeface… just bold block letters.

The young woman who took my money did so with not even a hint of a smile. She disappeared and finally returned with the change. Then I waited for the food. It, too, was delivered without any emotion.

I had to laugh! How do you legislate a bright personality? And how does a boring sign engender enthusiasm?

A well-meaning manager lettered the sign thinking it would accomplish the purpose. But managing by example won the day – no positive personality in the message.

Have you ever tried to say “no,” but nod your head “yes?” Mixed messages create confusion and rarely achieve the goal.
How do we create excitement and energy in others? How do we engage those around us? What are the elements of environments that encourage associates to genuinely express a winning personality?

Perhaps the next time PERSONALITY is mandated, management will think of a more creative way to reflect its order. And perhaps the next time the woman at the window will add a smile and happy word as she passes the food to the customer. And just maybe that personality will be the result of a work environment produced by authentic cheerfulness.

Brenda’s Blog – September 16, 2014

“This mouse makes me crazy!  I am always typing where I don’t mean to.”

My sweet friend called to read me a letter.  When she made changes, she went through the infuriating experience of finding the “bouncing ball” in a totally unexpected place and her revisions inserted into strange locales.

This exasperates me, as well.  My typing speed is rapid and to find letters suddenly appearing randomly out of order frustrates me.  “Why can’t it just stay where it is and make things simple?”

What is the answer?  Clearly, to make no corrections, additions, or deletions would solve the problem.  But speedy as I am, mistake-free performance is yet to be accomplished.

No, the answer is to check the position of the little black line (there must be a technical term for it) before typing to see that it is aligned in the desired position.  Sounds easy enough, but when my mind gets going, and my fingers engage, my lower tier tasks (like visual contact with the line) fall off the list—-until I find my letters smack dab in the middle of a word three paragraphs up on the page.

Why is this worthy of consideration?  For one reason:  good leaders make sure their ducks are in a row before taking flight.  It is easy to think about the larger picture, and move forward with the vision without checking to see if the action steps are in the sync with the mission.  We laughingly talk about “ready, fire, aim,” but failing to see the next step clearly brings healthy forward progress to a screeching halt.  Action before assessment equals time wasted.

I consistently remind myself to make sure the black line and my mind are in the same place, but consistently I begin typing only to discover that crazy little whatever has a mind of its own and wanders – much to my chagrin.  People are the same way.  Unless they are in line with the direction, time is wasted recovering momentum, retraining, restructuring, and starting again.

Bringing goals and little black lines into conformity makes the job at hand so much easier!