Weekly Thought – January 7, 2020

Fred, in his thinking on maturity, spoke and wrote about mental health. He once said, “I give a testimony rather than a medical thesis about mental health.” He used his own perspective as a traveler, not a theoretician.

Plans for 2020 begin with conversations among team members about goals for the year and campus activity. For the next two years we will be drilling down deeper with conversations among selected students and BWFLI teams. It is interesting to see the focus go from contact with 1000s to concentrated attention to 10s. The broad brush approach certainly introduced us, but the almost one on one interaction and engagement allows us to bring Fred’s principles into closer focus. THANK YOU for your participation with us through team membership, prayer, words of encouragement, and financial support. The work goes on and we eagerly anticipate 2020.

Getting Our Heads Together

Our desire for mental health is at the heart of the matter. Christ, at the pool of Siloam, asked the man “Do you want to be well?” I used to think this had to be the most useless question in the Bible. Who wouldn’t want to be well? But the more I dealt with people the more I realized not only was that not useless – it was essential to the man’s getting well.

As we look at our plan for mental health we must ask ourselves, “Do I want to be well?” If so, then simple, consistent discipline is required. A note, I am not talking about mental disease which should be handled professionally. I am writing to those who want to construct a strategy for emotional wellness as part of their general life plan. I have several good friends who serve their psychiatric patients well.
Let’s look at an exercise as we begin our conversation.

Take a card or piece of paper; draw a line from top to bottom creating two columns. On the left, write down those emotions you must discipline in order to stay mentally healthy. On the right, write the ones you recognize bring you mental discomfort or even sickness. After doing this, take a good look at both lists. The appropriate response is to create the discipline, as much as possible, to build the healthy emotions into our daily living. Part of this is to understand how they work. For example, gratitude is high on my list for desirable emotions. In order to cultivate thankfulness I try to understand exactly what it looks like when I am practicing it. I create a pattern which grows into a habit, and eventually a lifestyle. But it begins by identifying it as helpful and healthy, then purposing to build it into my life.

No two of us will have identical lists. For example, one person may have fear as an unhealthy, undesirable emotion, but only see it as a distraction from mature growth. Another, who lists fear will be paralyzed by it and unable to make progress while in its grip.

After careful study of the strength building emotions, prioritize them. Some people devise a plan and then wear themselves out trying to master each and every aspect of their “healthy person” ideal. Make a plan for enhancing the value of the good emotions. Of course, they all overlap to some degree. A grateful person will undoubtedly show kindness. And, a forgiving person will be one of grace. But determine the primary emotions.

One last word – spend little or no time trying to correct the negative emotions… that is a waste of time and energy. Let the good drive out the bad through its own momentum.

This week think about: 1) In this new year what emotions do I want to emphasize? 2) How interested am I in analyzing my own mental health? 3) Who is a good role model for me in my high priority emotions?

Words of Wisdom: “The desire to be well is essential to getting well.”

Wisdom from the Word: “When Jesus saw him lying there and when he realized that the man had been disabled a long time already, he said to him, “Do you want to become well?” (John 5:6 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – December 31, 2019

Fred prepared every New Year’s Eve for the next day… not by partying, or even stocking up on black-eyed peas. He got his paperwork in order to spend the next day doing his yearly personal audit. Establishing priorities constituted a large part of his analysis.

May your looking back over 2019 give you opportunities to praise the goodness of God. And may your hopes for 2020 be grounded in His faithfulness.

The Responsibility of Priorities

Andrew Carnegie once asked a consultant, “What can you do for me about time control?” The consultant said, “I’ll make one suggestion, and you send me a check for what you think its worth. Here is my suggestion: Write down on a piece of paper what you have to do in order of priority. Start with number one and complete it before you move on through the list.” Reportedly, Carnegie tried it for a few weeks and sent him a check for $10,000. That was big money in those days!

I constantly find people trying to accomplish their work as if they were eating dinner at a smorgasbord. They don’t prioritize, nor do they complete anything – they just graze. They don’t practice good time management. An executive asked me, “Fred, how in the world do you turn down people who want to play golf with you?” Honestly, that question never entered my mind. My time is as much mine as is my money. If I don’t let everybody else spend my money, I’m not going to let them spend my time.

For example, I was traveling with the president of a subsidiary company. Every time we stopped at an airport, or sat down for a minute he’d grab a great stack of magazines and begin reading. I asked, “Do you like to read?” His answer surprised me. “No, I hate to read.” “But every time I am with you, you spend the time reading. Why do you do that?” His answer: “The President of the parent company sends me these magazines.” I asked, “What would happen if you’d walk into his office and say, ‘Hey, Boss, you want me to make money or read magazines? I’m willing to do either one, but I can’t read all these magazines and do my job, too.’” I went on to speculate, I will guarantee the boss would laugh and say, “Throw those magazines in the waste basket. I sent them to you because I thought they were too current to throw away.”

A friend of mine works for a CEO who is influenced by book referrals from consultants. When the CEO returns from a conference he immediately issues memos requiring all direct reports to read the latest “hot title.” A man came in to see me who wrote a book and brought me a copy – a big, thick book. He said, “I’ll call you in a week and see what you think about my book. I don’t read books just because someone gives them to me. I only read what I am currently studying. Your book costs $10.90. Since I am a slow reader, it would take me two days to read it. That means I’d be making about $5.45 reading your book. I think my time is worth more than that.”

I have a right and responsibility to establish the priorities which will enable me to best use my God-given gifts.

This week think about: 1) How serious am I about my priorities? 2) Who needs encouragement in wise time management? 3) When am I most challenged to ignore my priorities?

Words of Wisdom: “My time is as much mine as is my money. If I don’t let everybody else spend my money, I’m not going to let them spend my time.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Whatever you are doing, work at it with enthusiasm, as to the Lord and not for people.” (Colossians 3:23 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – November 19, 2019

Fred thought systematically. He once said about a friend, “He has an impeccable mind… everything is in place.” Fred, too, had a mind which organized for maximum usage. Mary Alice loved order, too, but in the house. She finally gave up on having his environment (covered with books, articles, scraps of notepaper, etc.) match the pristine nature of his thinking process.

2019’s Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute schedule completed with a successful time at Palm Beach Atlantic University. Thanks to Mark Modesti and the BWFLI team for their work. And deep gratitude to President Fleming and his outstanding staff for their devotion to the growth of their students.

Four Things

(Fred categorized as an effective way to organize content. This week’s thought is built on sets of four things.)

1. Four great questions:
   
   1. Adam, where are you?
      
   2. Am I my brother’s keeper?
      
   3. Who do you say that I am?
      
   4. Do you love me?
      
2. People are searching for these four things:
   
   1. a. Identity and individuality
      
   2. Community – a sense of being home
      
   3. Meaning and significance
      
   4. Hope
      
3. Those who have a high need for achievement display four characteristics:
   
   1. They set realistic, not impossible, goals for themselves
      
   2. They prefer work situations in which they can take personal responsibility for the effort and the goal achievement
      
   3. They desire feedback about their own performance
      
   4. They show initiative in researching their environment, traveling, trying new things, and searching for new opportunities
      
4. Four elements of entrepreneurial pursuits
   
   1. The emotional strain of playing with your own chips.
      
   2. Wearing more hats and being required to handle more detail than customary
      
   3. Realization that working with people takes twice as long and at least 50% more money.
      
   4. Consider early change in lifestyle and social status understanding money alone is not the full satisfaction in life.
      
5. Four steps to helping people reach their potential
   
   1. Locate the path of potential. People cannot do anything they want to or anything they can think of, despite current clichés.
      
   2. Have faith to believe in the potential. Faith is an act, not a feeling or simply a word. Faith is acting as if it were so.
      
   3. Initiate discipline to accomplish the potential. This is the operating system.
      
   4. Have gratitude to enjoy the potential. Gratitude recognized that we have nothing but what we have received.
      

This week think about: 1) Which set of four things particularly stirs my thinking? 2) How can I organize my thoughts to be more helpful to myself and to others? 3) Who should I be investing in this week?

Words of Wisdom: “Have faith to believe in the potential (of others) knowing faith is an act, not a feeling or simply a word.”

Wisdom from the Word: “There are four things on earth that are small, but they are exceedingly wise.” (Proverbs 30:24 NET Bible)