Ideas on Motivation

Weekly Thought – April 25, 2017

Fred consciously motivated people. He spent hours thinking about those in his network and how to stretch them. He thought of himself as a conduit for several of his friends who were speakers. As he read, listened, thought, he would put “material” into mental files to be accessed when he talked with any of these three people. He wanted to be part of their growth – and the use of their great gifts.

Ideas on Motivation

One of the ways I motivate people to think is always carrying blank cards in my pocket. When anyone says something worth writing down, I do. For years I tried to keep mental notes of memorable lines and then jot them down later. Then I realized the positive effect of asking someone, “May I write that down?” Often I get the response, “I didn’t know it was that good!”

People love to be quoted and doing so motivates them to think better. One of the nicest compliments you can earn is “He makes me think smart when I’m with him.” It’s a sign you are motivating people to think.

One of my early bosses had a way of saying nice things about his employees which would get back to them. True things which were nice. We appreciated it and worked hard to keep on doing things which he could notice. People work hard to uphold a good reputation.

Ask “what is special about this person?” For example, some people have a way of focusing on the positive in people. That can give you an opportunity to say “Here’s a person who looks for the best in others.” It not only strengthens the person, but gives them an idea of what you value.

I have consciously augmented my wife’s reputation as a creative listener. She is. I began doing it to comfort her because she was ill at ease in social situations and felt that she had little to say. We would come home and she would lament, “All I did was listen.”

One night at a dinner party, she was sitting next to a powerful top executive. His wife, seated next to me said, “Oh, I feel sorry for your wife having to sit next to my husband.” I replied, “He will talk his head off.” “You don’t know him at all then.” “No, I don’t know him, but I know my wife.” Sure enough, this man with the surly reputation did talk his head off. I am sure his wife wondered what in the world happened to him. What happened was Mary Alice. She had the ability to listen dynamically, to make people feel comfortable, and smart. She didn’t compete with him, and he thoroughly enjoyed the evening.

Effective leaders work to develop motivational strategies. They spend time thinking about specific techniques which are sincere motivation, not shallow manipulation.

This week think about: 1) Who is one of the best motivators I know? 2) How can I know the people around me and motivate them more strongly? 3) What is my motivation to motivate others?

Words of Wisdom: “People work hard to uphold a good reputation.”

Wisdom from the Word: “For everything that was written in former times was written for our instruction, so that through endurance and through encouragement of the scriptures we may have hope.” (Romans 15:4 NET Bible)

Motivation or Manipulation?

Weekly Thought – April 18, 2017

Fred refused to sacrifice his integrity for the sake of winning. He believed in the value of moving people to action, but never tricked them into action which only benefited him. His dear friend Zig Ziglar dedicated his life to inspiring and motivating others. They shared the joy of seeing the wood catch fire.

Motivation or Manipulation?

There is a critical difference between motivation and manipulation. One is getting people to do something from mutual advantage. The other is getting people to do what you want them to do, primarily for your advantage. If the person benefits, it’s purely a secondary goal.

Manipulation carries a hidden agenda; motivation carries an open agenda.

We all agree that motivation is good and manipulation is bad. But sometimes only a fine line separates the two, and it’s difficult to know which side of the line you are standing. The issues aren’t always clear-cut. Intent is the key. What could be motivation in one instance could be tainted by self-interest and turned into manipulation.

A psychiatrist friend chided me one night by saying, “You businessmen mistake manipulation for motivation. The difference is you can substitute the word “thirst” for motivation, but not manipulation.” That got my mind working. He was saying unless you are satisfying someone’s thirst, you are probably manipulating rather than motivating. What a simple, yet effective, measurement. Bottom line for me: I can motivate with integrity when I am bringing to consciousness a genuine thirst in another.

Whenever we try to motivate without the other person’s knowing what we are doing we need to be very careful. We can try to bring out a latent desire a person doesn’t even know exists. But we must always keep in mind: 1) recognize how close we are to manipulation; 2) set a checkpoint, and be willing to stop if an authentic thirst doesn’t develop; 3) never resort to immoral means even for righteous ends.

My good friend Zig Ziglar reminded my daughter one time to be sure and understand the difference between the “need to” and the “want to.” He was saying to her she must move away from her clear vision of what someone needed until she satisfied their own desire and want.

Remember the little boy whose obedience was not willing? “I may be sitting down on the outside, but I’m standing up on the inside.” Manipulation often results in silent rebellion. True motivation is a path to growth and maturity.

This week think about: 1) What motivates me to take action? 2) How do protect myself from manipulation? 3) Who can I help find their “thirst” this week?

Words of Wisdom: “Bottom line for me: I can motivate with integrity when I am bringing to consciousness a genuine thirst in another.”

Wisdom from the Word: “This is the reason I do my best to always have a clear conscience toward God and toward people.” (Acts 24:16 NET Bible)

Precious Memories

Brenda’s Blog – April 11, 2017

“Make a memory with me tonight.”

My sweet 94 year old friend Nance sat across the table at our weekly night out. Suddenly she started singing: “Make a memory with me tonight. I will put my arms around you and hold you tight; So tomorrow we will say ‘Wasn’t it a delightful yesterday?’”

WOW! What a moment.

When we were growing up, memories were high value items. My parents always talked about “putting deposits in the memory bank.” As we became parents (and now grandparents) we carried on the tradition. The accumulation of material possessions took second place to the opportunity of sharing stories, experiences, and time.

Before we close our eyes each night, perhaps it would be good to take a minute and check on the deposits made in the memory bank. We don’t need six figure additions – the little ones add up. And sometimes, just an email, text, phone conversation, a cup of coffee together, or a hug can build a solid account.

Reviewing the memories is one of the dividends. Reliving the experiences brings happiness and usually, laughter. Sometimes the harrowing times become the foundation for precious remembrances. Dad used to say to us, “The things you cry about today you will laugh about tomorrow.” Obviously, this applies to non-life threatening, or serious relationship crises. They don’t fall into this category, but the time the dog rolled in mud, ran into the house, and leaped on the couch definitely does! Memory material!

Nance’s husband of nearly 70 years left for heaven two years ago this month. She misses him, but she relishes the stories and the memories they made night after night – and yes, he did hold her tight!

What deposit did you make today? What will help you stop tomorrow and say, “Wasn’t it a delightful yesterday?”

Training Touchstones

Weekly Thought – April 11, 2017

Fred developed ideas, strategies, and people. He loved seeing growth and progress. He also appreciated the value of measures and metrics. Wanting to know if the process worked led him to define criteria for the effectiveness of training.

Thank you for your consistent, prayerful support of the Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute. Our next event is April 18, 19, 2017 at Greenville College in Greenville, IL. Please pray for the team members who will be traveling to campus to “stretch and bless the next generation of leaders… to the glory of God.”

Training Touchstones

The development of others is a strategic element in good leadership. Bringing others along to grow the organization is part of the mission. As training moves along, here are five ways to measure progress:

1) Is this person’s job fitting well with his or her talents? If not, I never be successful in fully developing the potential. It is my responsibility to assess the long range outcome and make sure the job and the talent match.

2) How much willingness to do the job am I seeing? I want to see if the person is enthusiastic about the opportunity to grow. Training has to be more than just an interesting way to pass time. And if I suspect the trainee is thinking, “Well, I’ll do it if you want me to, but I’m not really keen on it” I already know not to expect much.

3) How consistent is the person’s effort? Long-term, not sporadic engagement is what I want. It is the day in, day out effort that benefits both the organization and the employee. A friend once told me, “The amateur performs well when he feels like it. The pro performs well whether he feels like it or not.”

4) What are the objective results? I find many people want to tell me about activity, carry on conversations, give me excuses but produce little or nothing. I like to measure what has actually been done. Some people get by for years talking a good game but doing little. In our family we have a saying “Show me the baby, don’t tell me about the labor pains.”

5) Is this person willing to be evaluated? I am not going to spend time developing someone who resists having his results measured. In the same way, I do not want to attempt to train someone who will never ask for help. If a person knew all the answers, they would not need the training. I see too many whose egos won’t allow them to learn from others.

This week carefully consider: 1) How can I use these questions in my development of others? 2) What do I use as the measurement of personal progress? 3) When do I do my most effective training?

Words of Wisdom: “The development of others is a strategic element in good leadership.”

Wisdom from the Word: “A disciple is not greater than his teacher, but everyone when fully trained will be like his teacher.” (Luke 6:40 NET Bible)

Maximizing Effectiveness

Weekly Thought – April 4, 2017

Fred’s understanding of people created a high demand for his consulting services. He was particularly effective in labor negotiations, sales/marketing campaigns, and board restructuring. He had a clear view and a sound mind when it came to the productivity of organizations. Fred’s ideas were utilized throughout his 60 year business career. Later on Jim Collins popularized these concepts with the “right people in the right seats” language of Good to Great.

Maximizing Effectiveness

The secret of any organization’s success is choosing the right people to play key roles. I recently read about business executive Bernard Tapie who became famous in France by taking over failing corporations and turning them into successful money makers. He developed an empire of 45 companies. His secret: whenever he assumed control of a failing business he immediately brought in his fifteen member management team to reorganize. They worked like a well-oiled machine and repeated the process over and over.

One of the most important aspects of successful leadership is putting together a group of people to carry out the mission. Great athletic coaches know they must have talent to win and so take an active role in the recruiting process. Teams that just happen get happenstance results.

In the small organization staffing can be particularly vexing. But it is extremely important. A costly mistake in smaller operations is thinking they can get by with inferior employees because they aren’t large. Actually, the opposite is true. In a firm of one hundred employees, if one doesn’t pull their weight, it is a loss of 1% productivity. If a company has only 3 employees, one who is unproductive represents 33% of the workforce.

Attracting the right people requires enthusiastically selling your organization to quality prospects. Julian Price who built Jefferson Standard Life Insurance Company surprised the industry by his ability to draw outstanding men and women to a small, regional company in the South. It was small, but mighty in its people pull. In interviewing he would say, “We are going to build a mighty company here. Don’t you want to be part of it?” The challenge of growth and the promise of a future brought many to Greensboro, North Carolina.

Leaders should not be timid about going for the most qualified who bring to the organization the skills needed for growth. When we believe in our vision and our mission it becomes a critical endeavor and one worth sharing. People want to be part of something exciting. Finding the right people to fulfill the dream is the privilege and responsibility of leadership.

This week carefully consider: 1) How strong are my recruiting skills? 2) What is the profile of my ideal team member? 3) When do I enjoy pulling together on a project?

Words of Wisdom: “Teams that just happen get happenstance results.”

Wisdom from the Word: “The one who works his field will have plenty of food, but whoever chases daydreams lacks wisdom.” (Proverbs 12:11 NET Bible)

Taking Time

Weekly Thought – March 28, 2017

Fred approached every element of his life from a philosophical and theological position. He constructed a system of thought which served as the underpinning. His study of time is a good example.

Taking Time

As Donald Bloesch puts it, “Busyness is the new holiness.” Lack of time is a status symbol, and to me, that is backwards. If you really are somebody, you are in control of your time.

Personally, I think optimizing opportunities and talents is in a sense bringing redemption to everything around me – that is the valid reason to use time well.

These are my philosophical cornerstones:

1) I am a created being and therefore responsible to the Creator for my life.

2) Time is simply life’s clock. Time is a tool – a means in life – never an end. Time is not something to be pursued for its own sake, but for what can be done with it.

3) Since my life is measured by time, I have a responsibility to control it. Most of us don’t let other people spend our money; likewise, we should limit their power to spend our money.

4) I have been given the same amount of time each day as everybody else. The great achievers of the world don’t have any more hours than I do. It is simply untrue to say, “I don’t have enough time.” What is not the same for everybody is energy. Unless I recognize my level of energy and realize that it comes in ebbs and surges, I won’t use my time well. I won’t accomplish all that I could.

5) I also believe that anything I cannot accomplish in the time I have is apparently not my God-given responsibility to achieve. God is not going to hold me accountable for what I cannot do because of genuine lack of time.

6) When I know the ultimate purpose of my life, I can know whether I’m using my time properly. If I do not know that ultimate purpose, I have no way of judging my efficiency. Only God and I can know for sure whether I’m wasting or using.

I decided a long time ago that my ultimate goal in life was to stretch other people. I wanted them to live better, fuller, bigger, more noble than if they hadn’t met me. This is my redeeming call.

This week think about: 1) What is my purpose? 2) How do I assess the use of my time? 3) Where is God using me to stretch others?

Words of Wisdom: “Personally, I think optimizing opportunities and talents is in a sense bringing redemption to everything around me – that is the valid reason to use time well.”

Wisdom from the Word: “God gave Solomon wisdom and very great discernment; the breadth of his understanding was as infinite as the sand on the seashore.” (1 Kings 4:29 NET Bible)

Hide and Seek

Brenda’s Blog – March 28, 2017

“How much is under your bed?”

In my childhood and teen years I loved to read. I cherished my library card and used it readily.

Only one problem: I had great difficulty returning the books. And when I knew they were overdue, I would hide them under my bed until my Mom demanded they surface and return to their rightful owner – the public library.

This became a metaphor as I grew older. Some people talk about sticking their head in the sand. Not me, I stick it “under the bed.” I put unresolved issues, undone chores, and unattended to duties in a safe, dark place from which they cannot arise and haunt me.

But they eventually do. Like the kind library police who came to the door with a list of books and a demand for their return. In those days they didn’t have those “freebie forgiveness days” when all fines were erased. No, my avoidance technique meant I paid the fines out of babysitting money and puny allowance allotments.

What are the things that are secreted away just because they are either too difficult to handle, too troublesome to manage, or just too overwhelming to attack? Every once in a while I actually face up to them and give them an airing in the light of day. When I do they are usually dealt with in such a short time I wonder (time and time again) why I pushed them away and didn’t just get them done.

In life coaching there is a great term for these items – “tolerations.” We put something on a to-do list, then move it to an even longer one… and so forth until it becomes a perpetual undone. If something is on the to-do list for a day – great. If it is still there after a week it has become a toleration – something we put up with but don’t deal with. They weigh us down as surely as if we were adding layers of weights to our clothing. Tolerations are only removed when they become intolerable.

Let’s climb under the bed and clear out that tattered to do list which grew into moldy tolerations.

Want To, Not Just Have To

Weekly Thought – March 21, 2017

Fred was trusted. His ability to listen accompanied by his discernment created an atmosphere of safety. While in dialysis he developed friendships with the nurses and technicians. One young woman reached her twelve month sober mark and prepared for her ceremony at AA. “Would you be the speaker for me?” Fred traveled in his wheelchair to her meeting and delivered a powerful, personal address.

Want To, Not Just Have To

A man I know – a very successful professional – paid fifty thousand dollars, cash on the barrel head, to go to an alcoholism clinic. One of the most discerning things I’ve ever heard came from a staff psychiatrist at the facility: “For a long time people couldn’t understand how a man could be an alcoholic, sober up, stay sober for ten years, and then go back to drinking. People would say, ‘Surely he knew all the problems he had as a drunk, why would he go back?’”

The doctor went on to say: “We studied it and found out. People who give up alcohol, but only remain abstainers can be drawn back to drinking at any time. Those who go from abstinence to the joy of sobriety seldom return to drinking. But until they make that transition, they are vulnerable.”

There is a theological truth here. If all I have in life is work and more work trying to make myself good, then I may cave in the spiritual war at any time. If I understand the sovereignty of God and the power of grace, my life will be changed forever. Like the Apostle Paul, a grace filled life sees the struggles as challenges but ones filled with the presence of God, and not dependent on my own efforts or goodness. Once Paul tasted of grace nothing could woo him back to “the law” again. He moved to the joy of grace.

Many executives and other leaders battle in the same way. They struggle and suffer with their efforts to overcome disabling habits. They fight, win a bit, fight again, and continue this pattern. The Myth of Sisyphus tells the story of an ill-fated young man whose life work is to push a large rock up a hill, only to have it roll back on him just as he reaches the peak. Over and over he repeats this effort, never to get the rock up and over the hill.

Leaders need to identify their constructive strengths and their destructive weaknesses. Once defined, they should focus on the strengths and bolster the weaknesses. Once we create an environment and a lifestyle that allows this, we can run the race with joy, not just with gritted jaws.

This week think about: 1) Where have I moved from abstaining to joy? 2) What is the rock I need to abandon? 3) Who can help me identify my strengths and weaknesses?

Words of Wisdom: “If I understand the sovereignty of God and the power of grace, my life will be changed forever.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.” (Nehemiah 8: 10 (b) NET Bible)

Low Tire Pressure

Brenda’s Blog – March 14, 2017

“Low tire pressure – attend at once.”

I turned on the ignition, heading out for a busy day. The warning system certainly got my attention. Avoiding the message was not an option. Actually, it might have been in years past, but a modicum of maturity has actually developed in my “old age.”

So, I considered my options, enlisted the aid of my brother-in-law, and made it to Discount Tire.

Why is this blog worthy? Because it makes me think about life’s flat tires and emergencies. And more importantly – how to deal with them.
What are the first two considerations? Time and money. “How am I going to reorder my day to allow for this inconvenience?” “How much money is this going to cost?”
Too often in life I have allowed money to delay action – and of course, require an ultimate fix and even more money. Why do I think waiting will alleviate the necessity of action?

And equally important is the decision to take time for the fix. Rough patches and flat tires in life are never on the to-do list, are they? They are never convenient, or a welcome surprise. But they are always opportunities to learn about our reaction times. An essential element in the maturing process is the ability to react wisely and well. These “pop quizzes” come at inopportune moments letting us see where we are on the maturity chart.

When was your last flat tire? When did you get a sudden change in your plans? How did you process it? What did it tell you about your growth?

Discount Tire has customer service posters on their store walls. They are true to their word – they repaired, rotated, and sent me on my way with no charge – and a friendly smile. What another good lesson in ways to treat others as they face their potholes and flat tires. We should be the compressors who “air them up,” with lack of drama and abundance of good will.

Flat tires come, but they don’t need to flatten us. They are “teachable moments.”

Time Protection

Weekly Thought – March 14, 2017

Fred understood protecting his time. He said, “Just as I don’t let other people spend my money, I don’t let others spend my time.” He was extremely generous with his time, even when his physical condition deteriorated to the point of incapacitation. But he also knew how to avoid time wasters and people with no clear purpose for meeting with him.

Time Protection

Most people spend time like they do money. They spend until suddenly they run short; then they try to find ways to compensate.

The best approach, of course, is a disciplined lifestyle that prevents time (or any other resource like energy, money, opportunities) from slipping away in the first place. Ben Franklin said, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.” Most time management books teach: Adopt a philosophy, implement it, and then maintain it as a way of life.

But in my experience, most people are not that disciplined. What they need is an emergency checklist to gain a few hours in the week – something to ease the frantic pace and get through the crunch. A number of alternatives exist: specific down periods during the week for catching up on administrative work; organized, scheduled retreats to plan future activities; an active, up-to-date calendar. One of the areas of focus most needed and most disregarded is the “eye on the goal.” Saying “is this expenditure of time advancing my mission, my plan?”

Occasionally an exhausted executive or ministry leader comes to me and I say, “You are under the gun, aren’t you? How much time would it take for you to catch up?”
More often than not the answer is, “If I just had five more hours a week!” If he or she is already working 50 hours a week that means a 10% increase to loosen up the load.

Here is a way to pick up five hours from any week you choose. It provides immediate and effective relief for those who are swamped. BUT IT IS FOR EMERGENCY USE ONLY. As in dieting or spending money, the long-range answer is a better lifestyle that doesn’t require temporary bail-outs. So, mine is a battle plan, not a war strategy. You shouldn’t continue this emergency plan for longer than four to six weeks.

For example, if the leader is a pastor he can walk into the pulpit and say, “Folks, you’re not going to see as much of me for the next month. I’ve gotten behind in some very important things I need to do. What I have been doing is important and needful, but a catching up is required. I want your understanding the next four weeks while I get some of our pressing needs in good working order.”

Everyone in leadership can do this – and must as an emergency plan. People (from board members to staff) will understand a brief on-the-job refocus. But they will feel dismayed and annoyed if they find you excusing goof-off time and declaring it an emergency – it has to be legitimate.

This week think carefully about: 1) How am I handling the time/task pressures right now? 2) Do I have social media fasts to reduce the distractions? 3) What is my emergency plan for capturing some extra time?

Words of Wisdom: “Most people spend time like they do money. They spend until suddenly they run short; then they try to find ways to compensate.”

Wisdom from the Word: “And God is able to make all grace overflow to you so that because you have enough of everything in every way at all times, you will overflow in every good work.” (2 Corinthians 9:8 NET Bible)

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