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  • Weekly Thoughts (Page 2)

The Balanced Life

Weekly Thought – April 1, 2025

Fred asked a question during a men’s retreat which spoke to their thinking on balanced living. “Are you driving with a distinct vibration in your operating system? Time control was of key interest to these attendees. Here are several illustrations from Fred.

The Balanced Life

Oftentimes I see people whose lives are simply out of balance. Years ago I was driving my 280ZX (proof of teenage residue) when suddenly I lost a balance on the right front wheel. Here was my dilemma: I could drive at 45mph or less and be stable, or go 65 and shake myself to pieces. This is the picture I have when I see so many people who definitely cannot go more than 45 without shaking and yet they are determined to go into career traffic traveling at 65 mph. If they could only stop, or knew to stop and get the little balance on the life wheel fixed they could be back all on the road. If you are balanced for 45 but insist on 65, you have to get a repair.

A recurring theme among leaders is getting back to the “simple life,” which usually comes down to the allocation of time. I laugh when people tell me they didn’t have time to attend their company’s time control seminar. I find many fail to understand the proper use of time and the value of delegation. Often mistake-prone clutter is illustrative of those who misunderstand the concept of leadership, particular talents, and the nature of building an effective team. Being the leader who is known as the “hardest worker” and the one who turns off the lights at night has tragically missed the point of leadership. Knowing our strengths and focusing on them is critical.

My philosophy has been: Do what only I can do and delegate the rest. I focus on my strengths and move everything else to the periphery.
So much is written about “the balanced life.” Reducing stress sells lots of books. An authentic life must have tension. If a living plant didn’t have the pressure of capillary action nutrients would never move from the roots to the leaves. One of my favorite books is Stress Without Distress. Balance doesn’t mean living life in neutral. Nor does balance mean all areas of life have equivalent focus. It does mean the integration of the parts make a complete whole. Integration should result in healthy living.

This week think about: 1) How long has it been since I evaluated my strengths? 2) What does a balanced life signify to me? 3) Who is an excellent role model for time management?

Words of Wisdom: “If you are balanced for 45 but insist on 65, you have to get a repair.”

Wisdom from the Word: “But as for you, be strong and don’t get discouraged, for your work will be rewarded.” (2 Chronicles 15:7 NET Bible)

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The Listening Leader

Weekly Thought – March 25, 2025

Fred developed an international reputation as a speaker, writer, management consultant, and board member. His gifting for thinking and communicating allowed him to “stretch others.” When asked about his wisdom he considered it a God-given talent, but pointed to listening and asking questions as two critical elements.

The Listening Leader

Every leader spends a good part of the day communicating with others. A great many books have been written on techniques of good communication, but the real problem is the spirit, not the technique. Attitude is often the barrier. Almost any two people who want to can talk together. Those who find difficulty communication find they are hindered by their desire to impress, not express.
The difference between a good team and a great one is motivation. Any organization with the ability to get to good can move to great with the proper motivation. And nothing motivates quite like effective communication.

Most leaders are adequate talkers, but inadequate listeners. The ability to listen creatively and positively depends on the leader’s ability to listen on four levels: 1) the meaning of the words 2) the choice of words 3) the sounds of the words and 4) the sight of the words. Most people listen negatively, which is simply keeping silent or reloading while the other person is reloading. Positive listening guides the talker both in the giving of facts and a display of emotions that permit the listener to evaluate on more than the surface level.

Listening can be apparent or latent. A key to latent listening is the ability to read body language. Gestures, eye movements, and physical positioning give clues which fill in conversational gaps. Our words can say one thing while our body responds in agreement or sending up red flags.

Communication is mistakenly confused with agreement. I often hear people say that all problems would be solved if we really heard and understood each other. Not so! In fact, if we really understood what the other one was truly saying, we might have increased disagreement. We talk around subjects in order to avoid points of disagreement. Hearing and understanding are critical to communication but not synonymous with agreement and concord.

This week think about: 1) How do I know I am being heard? 2) What enables me to truly hear others? 3) Who can help me develop my listening skills?

Words of Wisdom: “True communication is talking to express, not impress.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Let the wise also hear and gain instruction, and let the discerning acquire guidance!” (Proverbs 1:6 NET Bible)

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Victory Through Vision

Weekly Thought – March 18, 2025

Fred believed in the necessity of vision, mission, and purpose statements. He understood strong organizational leaders effectively initiated the importance of their being imbedded into the well-running business or ministry.

Victory Through Vision

Davd Rockefeller was once quoted: “The number one function of the top executive is to establish the purpose of the organization.” Like the hub of the wheel, everything else grows out of this priority. Until the vision is established, trouble is ahead. Scripture says, “Where there is no vision, the people perish.” The New American Standard Bible focuses on the way they perish. “Where there is no vision the people are unrestrained.” To be restrained is to be concentrated in purpose, is essential to accomplishment, and that is why the leader must define why the organization exists.

A leader must personify the vision and be dedicated to it personally. As they seek to maintain the vision, leaders must keep in mind these essentials:

1) Define the vision specifically. Leaders disperse the fog.
2) Express it so other people understand it. Lingo without logic simply confuses and doesn’t galvanize.
3) Get both organizational and personal acceptance of the vision. Nodding heads without knowing hearts keep the motors idling.
4) Repeat the purpose regularly and systematically. The Old Testament patriarchs set up stones of remembrance to remind the people of their story. Mary Alice always sent the children out the door saying: “Remember who you are, where you are from, and what you represent.” She kept the purpose “ever before them.” As they grew up and raised their own families, our daughter Brenda would remind her adult children “be a blessing.”

When you have a clear vision, you view every decision in its light. The vision is a filter and a grid through which all activity flows. It becomes the lens through which the entire operation is seen. The focus enables the leader to both include an exclude. Crafting a workable, sustainable vision can be time consuming, but its effective use is a far better alternative to perishing.

This week think about: 1) How clear is my ability to communicate my personal vision? 2) What am I able to see that inspires confidence in others? 3) Where can I help others craft effective vision statements?

Words of Wisdom: “Lingo without logic simply confuses and doesn’t galvanize.”

Wisdom from the Word: “I will give them a single-minded purpose to live in a way that always shows respect for me. “ (Jeremiah 32:39 NET Bible)

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Effective Self-Management

Weekly Thought – March 11, 2025

Fred answered a first-time question “Can we get together?” with “Meet me at Cindi’s Deli at 6:30.” It was his first step in evaluating the seriousness of the person. “Could we make it 8:00?” usually equated to a relational false start.

Breakfast with Fred became a buzz word for wisdom gathering among his broad network of learners and leaders. This week’s theme is from his 2007 book Breakfast With Fred. Though focused on executives these principles apply to every area of daily living.

Effective Self-Management

The hardest person on any executive’s team to supervise is himself/herself. The recognition is soon recognized that “my problem is me.”
If many people took the energy and intelligence they spend devising ways to avoid work and applied it toward building a work plan, they would be highly successful. One of the most important executive disciplines is cutting off escapes from effective work. Sadly, there are executives who are strategic about accomplishment avoidance. For example, a great many people study their jobs rather than work at them. Most people already know considerably more than they are actually using in the workplace. Education is not the problem – disciplined motivation is.

Another escape for most people is activity. They have not learned “results are the only excuse for activity.” Many people feel as day’s end that they are satisfied with their efforts when in fact they have just been busy. They are the chief of their local fire department putting out flames but never constructing buildings. They are on the run but never getting anywhere productive. Too many eat, belch, and run – like fire trucks with dirty engines. Little boys make lots of noise playing firemen but grown men and women need to put away their helmets.

In order to accomplish anything you must have a definite goal. Unless you can write it down it isn’t definite or specific. My mentor, Maxey Jarman, taught me that aimless verbal wandering has no power. Only when I put the goal on paper does it take shape. Until it is formed, it may be an idea of a direction, but it isn’t a goal. A ship with a lot of steam doesn’t get to port unless it stays on course.
Once the goal as been set, it must be pursued with a burning desire. The desire must be maintained and sustained with discipline.
(Editor’s note: Later in Fred’s life he changed his focus from strict goal setting to a clear understanding of direction. In fact, one of the questions he would ask emphasized the import of this element in successful living… “Are you satisfied with the direction you are going?” He often spoke of “revectoring” which was the way he described keeping keyed to “true north” and staying on direction. The popular trends of 3 or 5 year plans had less interest for him. He wanted to define his life mission and then measure “staying on course” with regular checks.)

This week think carefully about: 1) How disciplined am I about putting my goals and direction in writing? 2) What will it take to “get out of my own way?” 3) Who models productive activity rather than just busyness?

Words of Wisdom: “A ship with a lot of steam doesn’t get to port unless it stays on course.”

Wisdom from the Word: “May he grant your heart’s desire; may he bring all your plans to pass.” (Psalm 20:4 NET Bible)

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A Word From Zig

Weekly Thought – March 4, 2025

Fred published the fourth of his five books: Leading With Integrity in 1999. Zig Ziglar, Fred’s longtime friend, was asked to write “a word of introduction.” This week Zig’s thoughts are featured. Fred valued the relationship and the times together. (Although the book is now out of print, frequently our weekly thoughts are generated from its content).

A Word From Zig

“My friend Fred – actually he’s more than a friend. He’s a confidant, adviser, mentor, pleasant companion and encourager. He has guided me through some deep water; given me wise counsel, answered some of my puzzling life, scriptural, and business questions; provided me with a wealth of material for my books an seminars (so much so that it’s been years since I’ve written a book that did not include a few Smithisms.)

Leading With Integrity is an extension of Fred Smith’s love for mentoring others, but especially for those who aspire to spread the gospel of Christ. You will note his economy of words as he serves up helping after helping of common sense, wise and provoking pearls that inspire and convict you to be more so you can do more.

Fred writes to you as he has talked to me since he took me under his wing years ago. At our first meeting, I had to use scraps of paper to record his gems of wisdom. Since then I’ve always brought a notepad to record his “message” for the occasion. He always gives me usable, transferable ideas.

Smithisms have become part of my vocabulary. They are good – really good.”

Editor’s note: An extensive list of Fred Saids are available on both www.breakfastwithfred.com and www.bwfli.com

This week think carefully about: 1) Who is a key influencer in my life professionally, relationally, spiritually? 2) Looking back how have I expressed gratitude to mentors and friends? 3) What “words” do I need to write or speak to those who have encouraged me?

Words of Wisdom: “Who you spend time with greatly reflects and influences your life direction.” Fred Smith, Sr.

Wisdom from the Word: “A friend loves at all times.” (Proverbs 17:17 NET Bible)

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Fred Saids

Weekly Thought – February 25, 2025

Fred called them “one liners.” When the Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute began the decision was made to create an archive on the website. They became the foundation of the “Fred Saids” tab. This week we feature 22 leadership focused wisdom bites. Select a few that can stick with you as a gift from Fred.

Fred Saids

1) Good leadership is not domination; it serves through mutual benefit.
2) True leaders have a uniqueness that must be recognized and utilized.
3) A true leader loves excellence.
4) Leaders are not capricious. They balance emotional drive and sound thinking.
5) Ultimately, it is the force of character that inspires others to follow with confidence.
6) Authority, but not responsibility can be delegated.
7) A leader knows to whom he/she can delegate and to whom work can only be assigned.
8) Whoever is under a leader’s direction should also be under the leader’s protection.
9) Leaders need the humility of simplicity… simplicity developed beyond complexity.
10) A leader must see the project as a whole, not just its parts. Sometimes, the love of a specialty must be sacrificed to the overall accomplishment of the vision.
11) Every decision should be evaluated considering risk versus reward. Long term winners play with the odds with them, not against them.
12) Leaders can be innovators or maintainers – one originates while the other stands for the status quo.
13) Those who want no fences are usually predators.
14) Humor can open even the most closed mind.
15) We express our values by our choices.
16) Speak to express, not impress.
17) Strong leaders never institute a policy they cannot enforce – it weakens the confidence of others.
18) It is good indeed when the passionate are right.
19) Intelligent leaders profit from their mistakes by not repeating them.
20) No sluggard can succeed in leadership.
21) No one is qualified to lead until the art of obedience is learned.
22) Leadership consists of getting people to work with you, and not just for you.

This week think about: 1) Which of these strike a chord and can be applied this week? 2) How can I use these thoughts to develop others? 3) What questions would I ask Fred if we were having breakfast?

Words of Wisdom: This week just pick a favorite.

Wisdom from the Word: “This also comes from the Lord of hosts. He is wonderful in counsel and excellent in wisdom.” (Isaiah 28:29 ESV)

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Standing Steadfast

Weekly Thought – February 18, 2025

Fred carefully studied leaders of all generations, reading biographies and engaging in conversations. He stayed current and “in the loop” as he frequently said. One of his favorite “Fred Saids” was: “Principles never change – just the illustrations.” These words were written in the late 1990s… timely and timeless example of his comment.

Standing Steadfast

I heard writer Chaim Potok say “a true leader is never absorbed in the stream in which he swims.” Scripture calls this being transformed rather than conformed.

Our society is facing many positions that require challenge and clarification. For example, relativism, situational ethics, personal responsibility versus rights, acquisition and distribution of wealth, equality, political expediency, peer pressure and self-love as expressed in image and significance.

Values and ethics have become a hot subject… almost to the point of becoming a cultural fad. Big philanthropic dollars are flowing to think tanks to study the topic; colleges are establishing departments to investigate their impact; and writers are prolifically cranking out page after page for best seller lists.

I once spoke to a conference built around the theme of “values based leadership.” Everything said was well and good, but I felt I needed to point out we need to ground our human values in divine virtues or we end up being controlled by our human desires, vacillating according to our human interests.

True authenticity requires the foundation of virtue (which is scriptural) not just values manufactured in convenience and social exigency. We need to build on God.

Just as Newton did not create gravity, but discovered it, so we cannot create true virtues. We can discover them and make them the bedrock of our value system. We must always be careful not to sacrifice on the altar of popular acceptance and current thought. Values without virtues are barren.

This week think about: 1) How often do I sacrifice Biblical virtues for cultural values? 2) What role am I to play in calling my sphere of influence to transformation, not conformation? 3) Who defines steadfast contemporary moral, Biblical stands?

Words of Wisdom: “Values without virtues are barren.”

Wisdom from the Word: “And to all these virtues add love, which is the perfect bond.” (Colossians 3:14 NET Bible)

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Character Counts

Weekly Thought – February 11, 2025

Fred believed leaders made decisions which determined the character of their organizations. He reminded groups of leaders that they could never make exceptions for themselves. They were responsible to make sure decisions were in line with the values and mission of the organization.

Character Counts

Decision makers hold the responsibility for disciplined choices and direction. In considering this aspect of leadership it is critical to look at the undisciplined, not just the well-disciplined. Here are a few of the poor drivers which result in poor decisions.

1) Trying to maintain control. Some organizations create structures for personal, not for leadership development. Generally, the control driven leader is self-serving. Dictators do not develop great succession plans.
2) Trying to outdo the competition. Heathy competition is one part of the infrastructure of commerce, but conniving, fraudulent practices to undercut and undermine others makes for bad decisions.
3) Refusing to admit mistakes. Effective leaders must name and claim mistakes as quickly as possible. The loss must be minimized and the remedial actions must begin immediately. Denying mistakes does not work for real leaders.
4) Hiring or promoting people based on politics. A leader’s first question should be: “Will this person and or move help the organization to fulfill the mission?” The wrong question always is: “will this person and or move vote my way or forward my personal goals?”

True tested, disciplined character is required for the building and leading of an organization with honesty, integrity, and purpose. Disciplined decisions avoid rationalizations, irresponsible and self-serving choices.

This week carefully consider: 1) When have I let personal goals allow an undisciplined decision? 2) How can I help others avoid these pitfalls? 3) What safeguards have I established to ensure my character holds even under the fiercest fire?

Words of Wisdom: “Strong, effective leaders understand that exceptions to organizational values are unacceptable – even for themselves.”

Wisdom from the Word: “For you know yourselves how you must imitate us, because we did not behave without discipline among you.” (2 Thessalonians 3:7 NET Bible)

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Following the Mandate

Weekly Thought – February 4, 2025

Fred appreciated talented leadership. He studied them, and spent time associating with strong men and women always learning. He particularly liked the thinking of Max DePree, founder of Herman Miller Furniture Company and author of Leadership Jazz. Fred often quoted DePree: “The number one responsibility of top management is to define reality.”

Following the Mandate

Once the leader defines reality, sets the vision, and gathers a consensus around the mission the organization can move forward with the mandate: “designing programs, recruiting, culture, and an operational strategy. It is key to decide what the business or ministry will and will not do.

1) Loyalty to the mandate, not the leader is critical. The leader must say “I am subservient to the mandate; you don’t serve me. Your job isn’t to make me happy. And don’t keep me in charge unless I fulfill the mandate.”
2) Narrow the focus. There needs to be specificity in the mandate. It should not be possible to interpret a mandate except in a narrow sense. That discipline enables the leader to set boundaries within which programs are developed.
3) Create the right team. When a leader is sure of the mandate, he or she can create a more effective team. The proper team can generally be selected by the fit with the mandate.
4) Call is different from mandate. Mandate is institutional; calling is personal. A leader needs to have a clear sense of call and the dedication to serve effectively. A continuing measure of a leader’s call against the organizational mandate ensures the proper fit.

As leaders think about the mandate for their organizations, they should remember: the simplest way it can be accomplished is the most effective. Organizations tend to let what they do become too complicated. Albert Einstein once said, “God does what He does in its simplest form.” Einstein again counseled “Make things as simple as possible, but no simpler.”

Define the reality and bring it to life.

This week stop to think about: 1) Where do I tend to move from simplicity? 2) How clear am I on the difference between my personal calling and my organization’s mandate? 3) Who models putting ego satisfaction away?

Words of Wisdom: “Call is different from mandate. Call is personal; mandate is institutional.”

Wisdom from the Word: “I heard the voice of the Lord say, ‘Whom will I send? Who will go on our behalf?’ I answered, ‘Here I am, send me!’” (Isaiah 6:8 NET Bible)

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People Patterns

Weekly Thought – January 28, 2025

Fred followed the principle: strong leaders identify patterns of behavior in their associates, especially those who are close to them. He had a God-given ability to read people; he spent his life developing and using the gift in order to “stretch others” which was his goal.

People Patterns

I have found helpful to employ people in the area of their gifts and passions. When you do this you only have to correlate their gifts and their work, not supervise them. In furthering this process I want to know:

1) Character: How a person uses his or her intelligence, and gifts is determined by their character. An executive friend of mine had a sign on his desk: “You can trust me to be who I say I will do and I will do what I say I will do.”
2) Confidence: It allows a person to attempt a task with a positive attitude and concentration. The lack of concentration is often disastrous.
3) Concept of self: I am not talking about self-image, but self-worth. This factor is related to the willingness to accept responsibility and self-development.
4) Collegial skills: The ability to operate effectively with teams is important. Loners can be stars, but they seldom flourish on teams. Understanding whether a person is cooperative or competitive under which conditions and circumstances makes a difference.
5) Commitment: The loyalty to the organization’s vision makes a person a good fit in addition to their skills and passions.

This “people reading discernment” is particularly important as measured by the size of the organization. One person out of place in a group of 100 represents 1%; the wrong person in the wrong place in a group of five represents 20%.

Understanding behavior is the key to peak performance. Reading people is essential to effective leadership.

This week carefully consider: 1) How do I evaluate those in my business, community service, or friends? 2) Which area is my strongest? Weakest? 3) What plans do I have to continue growing in discernment?

Words of Wisdom: “Strong leaders identify patterns of behavior.”

Wisdom from the Word: “For wisdom will enter your heart, and moral knowledge will be attractive to you.” (Proverbs 2:10 NET Bible)

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