Strength Through Fellowship

Weekly Thought – August 30, 2022

Fred believed in the development of personal, internal devotion. However, one of the key elements was the importance of Christian fellowship. During his lifetime he thoroughly enjoyed experiences at the Laymen’s Leadership Institute, Fellowship at Barkley, church retreats nationwide, and of course the Spiritual Emphasis Weeks on Baptist campuses in the 1950s and 60s.

Strength Through Fellowship

Our devotional life cannot be just an individual matter between us and God. It must be worked out and built up in the community of fellow believers. We have to come down from the Mount of Transfiguration into the valley where the sinews and muscles of our faith are developed.

When we pray “our Father” we are talking family, community, and body. On my wall I have a beautiful little sketch done with one line incorporating the words, “Bear ye one another’s burdens and so fulfill the law of God.” We are to share.

As Christians, we can become fully formed friends. I, like you, have a number of non-believing friends. We can certainly share common experiences and great memories, but nothing like I can with my dear friend Jim. When he calls he almost always begins, “Hey, brother.” We have a depth of relation that goes past ordinary acquaintances.

A good friend is struggling with a new son-in-law who is adjusting poorly to marriage and their family. The young man has come several times to hear me speak and has watched the friendship between his father-in-law and me. He asked if he could have lunch. Usually I tell people to meet me at Cindi’s at 6am but because he was coming from out of state I agreed. We talked and then he went back home. He told his father-in-law, “You and Fred are friends. Never in my life have I ever had a friend like that.” He is missing the foundational piece of the friendship – faith in Christ.

Unfortunately, many men are devoid of full friendships. They have golfing buddies, college friends, and business associates, but to find someone with a deeper connection is rare. When I spend weekends on men’s retreats one of the goals is to open up the conversation about Christian devotion and the need for genuine fellowship. The activities, daily contacts, and programs are designed to open up opportunities to begin.

As we serve one another and accept service from one another we grow in devotion. This isn’t always easy – our ego doesn’t handle receiving help and service well.

These are financially hard times (note: 1980s) in Dallas. Those with great losses are suffering emotionally. They cannot believe they are accepted without their financial resources. These are the times for us to share the burdens of others, and also to learn to receive the care of the body. That is fellowship – and the path to true devotion.

This week think about: 1) How deep are my friendships within the body of Christ? 2) What can I do to stretch myself spiritually? 3) Who is a true fully-formed friend in my life?

Words of Wisdom: “We have to come down from the Mount of Transfiguration into the valley where the sinews and muscles of our faith are developed.”

Wisdom from the Word: “I was glad about the arrival of Stephanus, Fortunatus, and Achaicus because they have supplied the fellowship with you that I lacked.” (1 Corinthians 15:16 NET Bible)

Keeping Up

Brenda’s Blog – August 23, 2022

“Welcome to the future, Gram.”

My 13 year old grandson told me about his enjoyment of the TV show, Monk. “Oh, I like that show, too. I watch it when I can’t sleep because it is on from 1-4am at home.”

“Do you want to watch one with me?” “Yes, I would love that. What time is it on?”

“We stream it, and watch it whenever we want to – we don’t have to wait for it to be on a TV channel. Welcome to the future, Gram.” I laughed and laughed. I felt like he was explaining how to use a car, leaving the horse and buggy in the barn!

My Dad used to say “principles never change, just the illustrations.” It is crucial to have a timeless foundation and timely applications. When we were raising the children our way of saying it was: “give them roots and wings.”

My future-oriented grandson teaches me about bloggers, YouTube videos, and fantasy games. I can teach him about character, perseverance, and love. The ancient truths of Biblical wisdom never become obsolete. My responsibility is to stay curious about all the “what’s new” pieces of his world while enjoying the opportunity to talk about sustainable values.

The sixty-five years between us evaporates when we laugh, marvel, and learn from each other. I may be older, but am trying to avoid getting old. His exuberance oils my imagination and my eagerness for all things new. Of course, there are times when my travels around the sun allow me to see potholes, and mine fields. My challenge is to warn in a helpful way, without wagging a finger. My concern must be based on God’s wisdom and love – two everlasting tent posts.

He may introduce me to on demand Monk… great fun! And, my desire is to encourage him as he grows in knowledge, good decision-making, and the joy of following Jesus. I, too, welcome him to the future!

Quiet Contemplation

Weekly Thought – August 23, 2022

Fred never tired of thinking about the expansiveness of God. He nurtured relationships with scientists, philosophers, and theologians. Plumbing the depths of creation fascinated him. He didn’t use these times for knowledge acquisition, but as sources for contemplation.

Quiet Contemplation

Charles Kuralt let the camera and microphone “talk to us” for several minutes on his CBS show. There was no narrative allowing us to look at these beautiful evidences of spring and hearing the birds, breeze, and rippling water. I would like to have an hour daily to contemplate nature.

Americans are not much for quiet. City streets, boom boxes (those noisy boxes on the shoulders of the young), and even our church services feature noise. Church growth experts say the fastest growing churches are the loudest. They call it “celebration worship.” But I still tend to think of it as noise, joyful as it may be.

Recently I spoke to an audience containing several foreign businessmen. I discussed the value of contemplation. After I finished a man with an unusually bright face approached me. “May we have lunch? I am a Hindu and contemplation is a major part of my religion, but I don’t hear many American Christians talk about it.”

“Be still and know I am God.” This is personal worship, removing the ritual of communal worship and arriving at the reality of a one-on-one relationship with the Almighty God.

After speaking at the Convention Center in Anaheim I was walking down the hall, I saw an old friend Gerardt Dierks, the German scientist. We held out our arms and hugged. “Gerhardt, what are you excited about?” His eyes misted and he replied, “The awe of God, the awe of God!” And then he said, “Fred, can you imagine a mind that can conceive of the DNA?” For the next 45 minutes discussing the awe of God as expressed in creation.

Contemplation is not passive; it is not what we do as we fall asleep. It is intense concentration, producing high moments for those practiced in it. Think of the moments in your life which are so deep you will never forget them.

I remember standing beside Mary Alice in the hospital after she delivered our first born. She held her, counting fingers and toes. I ask myself “Do I find those same high moments of emotion in our contemplation of God?”

In contemplation our relativity with God – not our relationship, but our relativity. He is eternal; we are temporal. He is infinite; we are finite. He is Creator; we are created.

For me, the effect of contemplation is: when I am small in His presence I am utterly secure; when I am big in my humanity, I am insecure. When I lean on my own position and power I am always expecting someone else to knock me off. My smallness in Him gives me ultimate security.

For me that is the joy of quiet contemplation.

This week carefully think about: 1) How comfortable am I with quiet contemplation? 2) Why do I prefer man-made noise to God-given quiet? 3) What am I learning about myself in the quiet?

Words of Wisdom: “’Be still and know I am God.’ This is personal worship, removing the ritual of communal worship and arriving at the reality of a one-on-one relationship with the Almighty God.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Indeed, I have calmed and quieted myself like a weaned child with its mother; I am content like a young child.” (Psalm 131:2 NET Bible)

The Broader Way

Weekly Thought – August 16, 2022

Fred took his last breath at 9:15 on August 17, 2007. To some it may be a cliché, but in truth he “finished well.” He identified his giftedness, developed it, and used it to stretch others.

The Broader Way

A research study by the Menninger Clinic looking at common traits of mature men and women found that “they draw sustenance from many different sources.” They saw that those studied were not narrow people.

Service is one way of paying attention to broadening our lives. My friend lived “the high life.” He was an executive with a $300,000 income (in the ‘70s), a yacht, and jet. After embezzling six million dollars his life drastically changed. He traded his mansion for a federal prison. When he came out he had no friends, business, or family. He wandered the streets of his town, ending up in a half-way house. While speaking in his town a few weeks ago I saw a man across the auditorium. “Who is that man? He looks vaguely familiar.” I knew it couldn’t be my friend with that shining countenance, straight bearing, and purposeful expression. Nobody could change that much, I thought.

After the meeting I walked toward the man. We recognized each other and reached out to hug. “When are you going back to the big time?” My question seemed to be appropriate for this man of confidence and strength. “I’m not. Fred, I found my place working with ex-convicts and helping minority businesses become profitable.” He traded his life of selfishness for a life of service.

Recently, I talked to an over the road truck driver. He was excited about his life. He said, “I’m always looking around the next curve and over the next hill.” When I asked if he ever took his wife he responded, “Once.” “Why only once?” “All she likes to do is knit. We drove along passing beautiful views, and all she did was sit and knit, saying nothing, and seeing nothing. So I thought she might as well sit at home knitting. I could keep on driving, seeing and thoroughly enjoying everything I could. There is just so much mile after mile.”

He knew what it meant to broaden his life.

When we focus our attention, deepen and broaden it, we are simply becoming more alive – and well on the road to maturity.

This week think carefully about: 1) How open am I to new experiences? 2) When do I feel most alive? 3) What challenges and stretches me to grow toward maturity?

Words of Wisdom: “He traded his life of selfishness for a life of service.”

Wisdom from the Word: “I know your deeds: your love, faith, service, and steadfast endurance. In fact, your more recent deeds are greater than your earlier ones.” (Revelation 2:19 NET Bible)

Careful Confrontation

Weekly Thought – August 9, 2022

Fred did scattershot thinking. Interviewers struggled to keep him going down just one track. One thought bounced around and bounced off others. Before the interviewer could land one idea, another direction took over. But those who understand his pattern thoroughly benefited from these conversations. Harold Myra, retired CEO of the Christianity Today International companies uniquely captured his rhythm and knew how to play the game. Together they produced great content, and formed a lasting friendship. This week’s email is “a rabbit trail” from an interview.

Careful Confrontation

Confrontation is an explosive topic, especially within the Christian community. We prefer to talk about tolerance, love, mercy, grace, and other “spiritual” responses. But we fail to accept that Christ confronted.

However, He went to the source of the problem. He didn’t need the rich young ruler to give Him his money. He simply wanted to confront the financial idolatry present in his life. He certainly didn’t expect the Pharisees in the temple to stop their work – he wanted them to leave their self-righteousness behind.

So, in confrontation, you always want to try to go for the essence of the problem. Adler gave me a concept which has been extremely helpful. He wrote that every man is logical if you understand the base from which he operates. I try to create scenarios from which everything the person does makes sense. When I can do this, I believe I understand the problem. But until I can get to the place of understanding the logic, I still don’t understand the base from which the person is operating.

Many times I talk with parents who are totally frustrated with their children (especially grown ones). “I cannot understand what he/she is thinking. How in the world could they make that decision?” When we step back and come up with an understanding of the premise from which the child is operating, then the decision and the behavior makes sense. It doesn’t drive the parent any less crazy, but it is a step forward.

Sometimes confrontation takes real hard thinking. You have to develop an intuition for problems. And always leave room in your own thinking for the real possibility you may be wrong. That is a fundamental reason I offer options, not advice.

The proper attitude toward confrontation is key. It is not an opportunity to embarrass, play the power card, or let off steam. Evaluating myself first is a primary check-off. What am I trying to accomplish? How will this affect the individual, the organization?

Mature confrontation is for progress, not ego satisfaction.

This week think about: 1) How comfortable am I with confrontation? 2) Should confrontation differ according to the environment? 3) What are ways I back away from confrontation?

Words of Wisdom: “When you understand the base from which a person operates, their behavior is logical.”

Wisdom from the Word: “I thought, ‘Certainly you will respect me! Now you will accept correction!’ (Zephaniah 3: 7(a) NET Bible)

“Altar-ations”

Brenda’s Blog – August 9, 2022

“Some of my most significant life events happened at an altar.” Jack Graham, Pastor Prestonwood Church

As I drove down the road early one morning I listened to the sermon of Jack Graham. His subject was total surrender to God’s will. I thought back over my life, recalling several key moments kneeling at an altar dedicating my life; standing before an altar pledging marital fidelity, and joining hands with family members as we said goodbye to beloved parents.

Then, in typical Brenda-fashion, I started hearing the word roll around, changing its meaning. Altar became alter. But they really are not so very unlike.

I heard a woman bemoaning additional weight the other day… ”I used to blame my dryer for shrinking my clothes, but I was wrong – it was the refrigerator’s fault.” Clothes that used to be a tad too big now hug my ample late fourth quarter body. How thankful I am for elasticized waists!

Living for nearly 80 years gives me the advantage – a robust selection of rear view mirror experiences. I can look back on moments of alteration when critical changes were made. Some shocked me while others quietly creeped up. Some were received with boundless joy while others took my breath away and threw me into a spin. But all were alterations!

And even better than that – they were altar-ations. They were brought into my life by the hand of a loving, gracious, all-powerful God. When I kneeled in recognition of His goodness my heart experienced peace preciously unknown. Peace with God and the peace of God gave me an acceptance of alterations and made each day one to practice altar-ations.

Don’t Duck

Weekly Thought – August 2, 2022

Fred grew up in the home of a Southern Baptist preacher. “Soul winning” burned in the heart of M.B. Smith. All five “Smith boys” grew up hearing their father stand in the pulpit holding his big Bible and powerfully proclaiming the Gospel. Fred’s philosophy of evangelism has helped laymen to comfortably share the good news.

Don’t Duck

One of my favorite weekends is the annual men’s retreats in Fresno, California. We have established great trust and friendship. However, at the beginning I had to explain that I am not a pastor, ministry leader, nor evangelist. Early in the development of the lay movement it was difficult for the idea of integrating Christian faith into all areas of life feel natural.

In the 1950s the Student Department of the Southern Baptist Convention piloted an idea: send teams of Christian businessmen to college campuses for a week, staying in dorms, fraternity houses, and speaking in chapel, classrooms, and informal sessions. We all had to explain we weren’t ordained preachers – we were business people. The response was positive. “I have never heard a businessman talk about faith like you all do.” We weren’t delivering sermons, or exegeting texts – we were talking about what it meant to follow Christ.

We were not taking the place of pastors – we were expanding their reach.

During these men’s retreats evangelism would always come up. I explained that I didn’t have that gift, but that I wouldn’t avoid talking about faith if it came up naturally. I boiled it down to two words, “Don’t Duck.” Each morning I found peace in praying, “Lord, today I won’t duck. If the subject comes up I will handle it as normally as I would any other subject.”

Talking to others about spiritual matters has never been as easy for me as talking about business. But when I made the Don’t Duck commitment it became a more normal part of my day to day. Once I did that I found the most interesting thing: spiritual issues come up – and they come up as naturally as any other subject. I don’t have to figure out ways to jam it into the conversation. I met a man recently who proudly told me he never leaves a person without challenging him with the gospel. I find staying open strangely provides opportunities repeatedly.

At one particular retreat weekend I talked about my commitment to “Don’t Duck.” An advertising man in the audience had an idea. The next time all the men walked around sporting a large lapel button with a duckhead crossed through with a black line denoting “Don’t Duck.”

When we listen to the Holy Spirit our experiences are beyond anything we could force.

This week think about: 1) How comfortable am I talking about spiritual matters? 2) What would change if “Don’t Duck” became my daily commitment? 3) When can I tell the Spirit is opening up the conversation?

Words of Wisdom: “Don’t Duck.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with a heart of mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.” (Colossians 3:12 NET Bible)

Is My Passion Focused?

Weekly Thought – July 26, 2022

Fred respected talent. He identified passion and vision as two common elements of high achievers. During his life he enjoyed conversations exploring facets of leadership. His ability to recognize principles and catalog them for the benefit of many was part of his giftedness.

Is My Passion Focused?

Every effective leader is imbued with passion. An accomplishment is often to direct proportion to the amount and intensity of the leader’s passion. It is contagious; it gives hope; it sustains in difficult times.

I like this definition: “Passion is concentrated wisdom with high energy in the pursuit of meaning.” My good friend, theologian Dr Ramesh Richard, said: “First in life, decide on your passion. What is your first love? If you have multiple passions, you’ll be ripped to pieces internally, resulting in a fragmented, random life. If anything other than the Lord Jesus Christ is your first love, you will fall into idolatry.” This international proclaimer and professor verbalizes it this way: “to make God look good and Christ well known.” In this he demonstrates his first love, his central passion. Christ is to be to focus – ensuring integrity of leadership.

The advantages of passion are many. It brings purpose, unity, intensity, and concentration. It leads to accomplishment. It gives intentionality to life. Passion gives depth, keeping us from the shallowness of mediocrity. With passion our life becomes a welder’s torch, rather than a grass fire.

Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn had an undying passion for truth and principle; Mother Teresa, a passion for the dying; Moody, Spurgeon and Graham – a passion for souls. I think about Edison’s persevering passion; and Churchills indomitable passion of will that gave the British their war stamina.

Those with exceptional passion receive it as a gift for they were created with this extraordinary capacity. They can unite the mind, heart, and spirit. They have the ability to lose themselves in a cause, dedicating their life to a single purpose. I think often of the Apostle Paul’s words: “This one thing I do.” He again spoke of his focus “I determine not to know anything but Jesus Christ and Him crucified.”

In leadership, focused passion accomplishes much more than merely considering an intellectual, scholarly approach.

This week carefully think about: 1) How clear am I about my passion? 2) Where is the intersection of my gifts, skills, purpose, and opportunities? 3) When do I vividly see the direction for my life?

Words of Wisdom: “Passion gives depth, keeping us from the shallowness of mediocrity.”

Wisdom from the Word: “But we passionately want each of you to demonstrate the same eagerness for the fulfillment of your hope until the end.”(Hebrews 6:11 NET Bible)

Mary B Ecclesiology

Brenda’s Blog – July 26, 2022

“Placing biscuits touching each other will increase rising when baking.”

I love Mary B frozen biscuits. As I put two in the toaster oven and looked for the baking temperature I noticed a little line titled “Tip.” The words made me smile and of course I put them cozily together on the baking pan.

Isn’t that like the Body of Christ? Isn’t our belief about the way the church works (ecclesiology) very similar to Mary B’s tip? Aren’t we to be a people who touch each other both rejoicing and weeping with each other in encouragement?

Think about family pictures you see on Facebook or you receive in Christmas letters. Some feature individuals with separate expressions and body language. Others show members with arms wrapped around shoulders, or hands touching. Don’t you enjoy seeing the interlocking ones?

As believers we are not to be a group of individualists who enjoy their personal “Jesus and me” faith. We are to be a community of faith with commonalities. We should share the hopes, cares, victories, and defeats as brothers and sisters who stand with each other.

Have you ever walked into a church service while on vacation? You are unfamiliar with anyone, yet you can detect evidence of their culture. You can take the temperature of the group right away, can’t you? We are called to lean into each other to assist the story of Jesus to rise from the building into the world. Radiating love one for another tells everyone Jesus is real – this is not just a social club; this is the gathering of those who follow the living Lord.

It isn’t easy to open our lives, but when we establish trust as “fellow biscuits,” we understand the principle of siding up to one another. When we grasp the concept of breaking the bread of life with those who don’t believe we know we want to offer a taste of truth and love in Jesus.

Let’s create a body of Christ which functions well because we eagerly touch each other’s lives.

The Joy of Forgiveness

Weekly Thought – July 19, 2022

Fred spoke frequently to singles’ church groups. Often participants would seek his advice, seeing him as a “father figure.” Forgiveness is often a foundational part of the conversations. This week’s message is an illustration gleaned from one of these weekends.

The Joy of Forgiveness

After a session with a singles’ group a young woman approached me with a distraught countenance. She began telling me of moving to her current town, taking a new job, and making a poor decision. I always ask if I can help, but I never begin asking direct questions of hurting people.

She told me of an affair with a married man. Then she asked me questions: “Fred, do you think God will take revenge on me? Do you think he will keep me from getting married? Do you think I will ever be clean again?” I told her of God’s forgiveness.

I then asked her “Are you willing to accept that this is your problem and no one else?” She admitted it was. Then I continued, “Can you admit this is sin and not a mistake?” Mistakes can be humanly corrected but sin requires repentance and God’s forgiveness. Then I asked, “Do you want to be giving up the benefits of this sin? Do you want to be clear of this?”
She looked down then said, “Yes, but I don’t know if I can or not.”

My response surprised her. “Until you say ‘yes, right now.’ Nothing is going to change.” You are going to hurt whether you give him up or not. If you do, I think you can probably count on about two years of hurting. Don’t buy into the false teaching that promises you will be happy, jumping around, and skipping for joy because you gave him up. You will hurt, but you will hurt with hope.

If you don’t give him up, you will keep on hurting, but without hope. There is a big difference.”

I never heard from her again, but she did write down the words: “Hurt with hope, or hurt without hope.”

The joy of forgiveness which follows repentance and turning from sin is a gift available to all believers. I hope she found the way of hope.

A few years later after speaking in another state a couple came up to speak. The woman said, “Fred, I was in an audience when you told this story. I was in her situation, and I chose to hurt with hope. I walked away and my husband and I are now happily restored. The ripples of God’s grace continue going out.”

This week carefully consider: 1) How do Fred’s words speak to me? 2) What can I learn about listening to hurting people? 3) Who comes to mind who needs these words of “hurting with hope?”

Words of Wisdom: “Hurt with hope or hurt without hope.”

Wisdom from the Word: “The sacrifice God desires is a humble spirit— O God, a humble and repentant heart you will not reject.” (Psalm 51:17 NET Bible)

«‹27 28 29 30 31 ›»