Watering It Down

Brenda’s Blog – April 21, 2026

The weather news said, “Flooding in Craighead County – roads covered with water.” It didn’t mean much to me as I traveled through driving rain in Arkansas — until I passed a “welcome to Craighead County” sign. Life is sometimes like that, isn’t it?

Shortly after entering the flood zone I noticed another sign: “Road dangerous when under water.” The rain was coming down in buckets, but the cars were coming from the other side, so I assured myself it was passable. And, it was only 15 miles – how bad could it be? At the “8 miles to Jonesboro” marker I felt like I had been driving for hours. Seeing the water rise out of the boundaries on each side and lap against the road made me harken back to “when under water.”

It was barely light, the cars from the opposite direction were noticeably fewer, and then I saw water creeping across the highway. I could see the road in between and knew I had enough room to pass through on pavement, so I proceeded, but not without thinking about being the “foolish old lady” who ignored warnings.

God was good – as it got dark and the water came up over the road, I turned on to a US highway and made the last 5 miles on “higher ground.”

To the dismay of my children (grown though they may), who groan when I begin with “life lesson,” I saw some very distinct principles illustrated:

1) When Craighead County says their roads are dangerous under water, don’t ignore it. There are times when we are given distinct, discernible warnings and we choose to look the other way.

2) Tunnel vision in achieving a goal can blind us to precarious choices we may make on the way.

3) Stupidity and perseverance are not synonymous.

4) Always remember! We have a God who knows our weariness, sees the water creeping over our roads, and never leaves us.

Joy and Respect

Weekly Thought – April 21, 2026

Fred’s influence on others continues, even 5 years after his homegoing. “I find myself using his phrases and quoting his thoughts,” said JH. “He was so down to earth and the things he said just seem to fit in.”

Joy and Respect

Joy comes to those who can truthfully (yet humbly) know they deserve respect. We have an inner reading on our personal attributes which measure up. Feeling respect for oneself is somewhat like feeling we belong. Sadly, some people never feel the satisfaction of understanding their place in life. Some of this comes from never gaining self-respect.

Becoming respected begins with becoming respectable. Living life worthily is the way of joy and respect. Gandhi understood this.

Bill Glass, my friend who dedicated his life to prisoners, speaks often of the way the incarcerated think of themselves and others. Unfortunately, positive respect gets perverted into admiration for criminal behavior. He believes their path began with a lack of human respect. Most of them never understood respect is earned because of our human potential for being a contributing, loving person. And just as important, that we exercise self-restraint in preventing harm to others.

I always say service is the rent I pay for the space I occupy on this earth. Too often we measure worth in dollars. Respect doesn’t come through accumulation alone. For example, mothers who may have never made an outside dollar in their life but raise children well and hold their families together deserve great respect and honor. Some of those who deserve great respect earn the least. I think of teachers and preachers.

Once I talked to a retiring executive who said his lifetime ambition was to “leave a better team on the field than the one I joined.” He built a lifetime legacy. A boy scout told me they were trained to leave their campground cleaner than when they arrived. That is a tremendous way to develop respect for oneself and the organization. I love the story of the old man who donated his eye to a young man so after he was gone he knew the eye would go on seeing. Purposeful giving garners respect.

The wonderful thing about joyful respect is the opportunity to weigh ourselves daily as long as we live. If the scales show us a bit short, we can do something about it immediately. Those who show no interest in earning respect by making a contribution have very little joy and usually a lot of guilt.

This week think about: 1) What do I most respect about myself? 2) How am I paying my rent? 3) Who models respect most profoundly?

Words of Wisdom: “Purposeful giving garners respect.”

Wisdom from the Word: “The hope of the righteous is joy, but the expectation of the wicked will remain unfulfilled.” (Proverbs 10:28 NET Bible)

Spiritual Dishonesty

Weekly Thought – April 14, 2026

Fred referred to himself as doing “crooked thinking on the straight and narrow.” Leadership Journal titled an article in 1983, Straight Answers in a Crooked Age. Fred’s article on intellectual integrity within the community of faith is excerpted this week.

“Is this Fred Smith who wrote You and Your Network?” The question from a stranger at Asbury Seminary began a conversation on Fred’s impact. God’s wisdom never ages. Fred is in heaven, but his earthly work continues.

Spiritual Dishonesty

I was playing golf with the head of a financial company. Out of the blue he asked me, “Fred, do you think God will take away my money because I’m not active in church?” “What makes you think he will?” I asked. “My family tells me he will.” They’re using religion to police him. No wonder so many have a jaundiced view of our God.

This goes on all the time. I was listening to the tape of a Christian friend’s funeral. The officiating minister said, “Jesus got lonesome in heaven and took Chuck home to be with him.” What is that widow supposed to think about such a capricious God? What do his children and grandchildren think about a God who gets so lonesome He takes away someone they love? I thought to myself if Jesus wasn’t with Chuck during life, then Chuck isn’t with Jesus now! What intellectual dishonesty.

Growing up in a parsonage I had a bird’s eye view of people who took out their hostilities intimidating others with the threat of God’s displeasure. It took me a long time to understand a God of grace.

I was speaking at a meeting in our state capital. After the meeting, a young man with a bright, but noticeably serious, face came up to me. “Mr. Smith, do you have anything I can say to my wife? We have just lost our two year old son.” He paused and then quietly said, “Do you think I am getting paid back for my past sins?”

I don’t know who put that idea in his head, but I would love to write that person a long letter about the nature of God. I would write about a God I know who doesn’t carry out grudges against unsuspecting and innocent children. As I said this to him, he was relieved.

We are called to spiritual integrity. We are called to rightly represent God.

This week think carefully about: 1) What inaccurate views of God am I carrying? 2) How do others attempt to police me for their own ends? 3) What freedom in Christ am I being called to display?

Words of Wisdom: “We are called to rightly represent God.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is present, there is freedom.” (2 Corinthians 3:17 NET Bible)

Purposeful Mentoring

Weekly Thought – April 7, 2026

Fred believed in stretching by adding responsibility. He assumed others wanted to do their best and to grow; he mentored by adding weight.

“The weekly thought came at just the right time for me. Thank you continuing Fred’s work,” wrote a North Carolina man. He is growing through stretching.

Purposeful Mentoring

A common mistake is thinking mentoring means older men visiting with younger men without an agenda and moving eventually toward a Bible study or prayer time. Visiting, Bible study, and prayer are all excellent activities, but they are not mentoring.

Mentoring is a one-on-one relationship for the specific and definable development of a skill or an art. One of my favorite mentoring stories is the young pianist who came to Leonard Bernstein and asked to be mentored. Bernstein said, “Tell me what you want to do, and I will tell you whether or not you’re doing it.”

When you analyze this, you realize Bernstein truly understood mentoring. The young man initiated the contact, had a specific request, and made the request of an authority. I assume the young man didn’t come to Bernstein only to get rich as a concert artist, but because he wanted to be a better pianist.

I am often asked, “How do I look for the right mentor?” The mentor and mentoree must share a compatible philosophy. Our goals and methods are really an expression of our fundamental life philosophies. As a Christian, in mentoring someone who wants to grow spiritually, the process must be built on divine principles. A young man came to me asking for my help in making him a millionaire. That was his life’s goal. His focus was on materialistic, humanistic outcomes. I told him we were not compatible philosophical, so I would not be a good mentor for him.

The mentor needs to be knowledgeable in the subject and objective in his assessments. The mentor who says what the mentoree wants to hear is irresponsible. He should not counsel in matters in which he is not an expert or pass judgment in subjects beyond his limitations. It is important to be able to say, “I don’t know; I’ve had no experience with that.” But, if that becomes a common response, this is not a good mentoring relationship.
The mentoree comes to learn and the mentor must have skills and experiences that promote the growth.

This week think about: 1) What skills do I have to offer a mentoree? 2) Who is my current mentor? 3) How do I ascertain if my philosophy matches another’s?

Words of Wisdom: “Mentoring is a one-on-one relationship for the specific and definable development of a skill or an art.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Let the wise also hear and gain instruction, and let the discerning acquire guidance!” (Proverbs 1:5 NET Bible)

Locked In

Brenda’s Blog – April 7, 2026

“I’m FREE!” That simple text expressed my sister’s release from ICE imposed house arrest. The first day was fun – a day off from work. The second and third days were challenging. And by day four she was marking her hours of incarceration by staring out the window, hoping to be sprung. (Actually, she was hoping for Spring!)

A friend of mine emailed to tell of a dream in which she watched the church move away from the bondage of darkness. The great hymn puts it this way, “My chains fell off; my heart was free; I went forth and followed Thee.”

What chains entangle you? What habits tie you up, hindering your progress?

One of my dear friends is in rehab. The current assignment is to write out the life story. “Where did the anger begin?” “Where did the hopelessness and powerlessness take hold?”

“In the free” is the slang for walking out of jail. We don’t have to wear orange jumpsuits to be psychologically incarcerated. And, we don’t have to be sentenced by a judge – we can judge ourselves declaring guilt that is undeserved. But we have the right to claim life “in the free.”

The grace of God through Christ Jesus pours down mercy hour by hour. Morning by morning we can receive His gifts of freedom. We are free to live without recrimination. We are free to throw off those shackles which slow us down.
As an influencer, what is holding you back? As a decision maker, what is hampering your effectiveness? What lies are you believing that put up road blocks?

Break free – put your life in four wheel drive and hit the road. There may be a few icy spots, but always remember – turn into the slide and you will be fine.

Making Peace

Weekly Thought – March 31, 2026

Fred wrote for Leadership Journal from its inception. He created interest by choosing subjects which most avoided. He worked with Harold Myra, Paul Robbins, and Marshall Shelley for years as they brought cutting edge material to the marketplace. This week’s thought is excerpted from a 1984 article titled “Why Peacemakers Aren’t Popular.” In today’s environment, a word about peace is helpful.

Encouraging emails this week comment on the ongoing value of Fred’s thinking. “It could have been written last week” is a frequent expression. That is the benefit of principle-based work. “Only the illustrations change,” said Fred.

Have you been stretched by Fred’s words? Who else needs to know about the Weekly Thought? Help us expand the reach and deepen the impact of Fred’s lifework by sharing.

Making Peace

Nothing I know starts fights faster than the subject of peacemaking. In principle, of course, everyone is for it. But it’s amazing how defensive and hostile people get trying to make peace.

One of the reasons peacemaking isn’t popular is simply because some have a vested interest in conflict. We see this in union/management negotiations, and sadly, even in the church. I have seen leaders take up the “purification of the church” cause thinking they are defending God. Personally, I don’t think God needs help, especially from the hostile.

Peacemaking is an action springs out of the right attitude. Sure, we will have differences, but they shouldn’t create anger and separation. Mishandling differences just raises the emotional temperature. We aren’t supposed to be fever-makers, but peace-makers.

We don’t redeem situations by changing organizational structures. We redeem them by bringing in a different spirit – the spirit of Christ – even if it means we’ll lose. As difficult as this is for me personally, it’s still true.

The Spirit of Christ eliminates the inflammation and inflammatory.

It’s amazing with the nearly universal desire for peace, very few people are willing to pay the price it requires. Like the rest of the traits mentioned in the Beatitudes, peacemaking is admired as an ideal and ignored as a reality. Too many of us prefer power to peace.

What Christians must remember is power does not come by vanquishing others. Power doesn’t even come by defending the right causes or the purity of our theology. No, true power (and peace) come through humility and obedience. And that’s a price few are willing to pay.

Think about: 1) How interested am I in peacemaking? 2) What price am I paying for peace? 3) What do I “go to the wall” for?

Words of Wisdom: “Too many of us prefer power to peace.”

Wisdom from the Word: “The Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace.” (Numbers 6:26 NET Bible)

They Call Me Virginia

Brenda’s Blog – March 24, 2026

“They call me Virginia, the navigator… I am glad you found us.” It was getting late; I had driven many miles; I was ready to quit. All well and good except for one thing: I couldn’t find the hotel. It was a national chain with an address near an interstate exit. No problem, so why was I lost? Why was I getting frustrated?

Finally, admitting defeat I called the hotel and sweetly said, “Where are you?” (Probably not so sweetly!) “People get lost all the time,” she answered before giving me turn by turn directions.

“You are without a doubt the hardest place I have ever tried to find.” Laughingly she said, “Yes, everybody ends up calling, so the regulars have a name for me: “Virginia, the navigator.” Her voice and manner was truly sweet.

“Why in the world are you built so far back on this crazy site and why in the world don’t you have signage?” “Oh, that’s easy. Our owners are from out of town and they already had this piece of land. The other hotels are owned by one man and he made it impossible for anyone else to put up any signs. You have to really want to get here!”

Virginia was a model employee with a tremendous sense of hospitality, but her employers had put her in a tough spot. Virginia understood making lemonade from lemons.

Max DePree says servant leadership is providing all the resources necessary for the employees to be all they can be, accomplishing all they can. Where do we hinder others from achieving? Where do we tie weights around their ankles, expecting them to run a winning race?

And then, what circumstances hamper our progress? Do we recognize the power we have to become a Virginia, or do we collapse into complaining and mediocrity?

How can we create an environment for others that challenge them to succeed? And how can we respond to our challenges with humor, and professionalism?

The same spirit of love, hope, and goodwill the newspaper correspondent described still exists in this modern day Virginia. Thank you for being a lighthouse on a dark night.

Great Teachers Are

Weekly Thought – March 24, 2026

Fred distilled. He took information and absolutely squeezed it dry until he had the essence and the principles. Then, he used them as platforms for magnificent high dives! He read an article by a French music teacher, Nadia Boulanger, on the art of instruction. He commented on the article in a memo to three nationally known teachers who were close friends. Then, he developed his own “attributes of great teachers” list.

Legacy is living and breathing. Fred’s “word of wisdom gift” (as a ministry leader referred to it this week) is being passed on through the lives he touched. Thank you for participating in prayer, words of encouragement, and financial gifts as we build the Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute.

Great Teachers Are…

Allen Shawn interviewed the French music teacher, Nadia Boulanger, for the Atlantic Monthly. His summation makes me think about great teachers: “She was devoted above all to God, and to the idea of music not as the monument of an individual but as mankind’s monument to God.” I like that. So where can we take that? My kids showed me a book, “Love is a Warm Puppy.” Too “ooky-gooky” for me, but it got me to thinking, Great Teachers…

1. Show the student that learning is part of the larger life… the specific course of study is not the whole, but a valuable piece.

2. Shed light on the dark areas of ignorance, showing them the beauty of construction.

3. Express truth that great talent always appears to the owner to be outside himself.

4. Realize we are limited by our emotional capabilities and we should be experience situations which test and expand our emotional wheelbase. Protecting against hurt insulates us from participating in life.

5. Understands candor in coaching should never cause embarrassment.

6. Communicates in vivid images which are unforgettable.

7. Walks comfortably with the transcendental nature of life – sees the longer view.

8. Balances affection and detachment. “I believe in you” is not “I see me in you.”

9. Appreciates the rhythm of learning and the discipline of structured instruction.

10. Recognizes learning consists of layers and layers of understanding and engagement which are constantly being peeled away like an onion.

11. Relishes the transition from memorization of a subject to being overwhelmed by its beauty.

12. Seeks a student who personifies what he or she believes and teaches.

This week carefully consider: 1) Which teacher has influenced me most greatly? 2) Who am I currently teaching? 3) Which of Fred’s points rang a bell with me?

Words of Wisdom: “It is wonderful when a teacher finds a student who personifies what he/she believes and teaches.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Then a voice came from the cloud saying, ‘This is my Son, my Chosen one. Listen to Him!’” (Luke 9:35 NET Bible)

Follow the Leader

Weekly Thought – March 17, 2026

Fred’s influence on college students enriched his life. Years after being on the Baylor campus he received a letter from a woman student, “Mr. Smith, it was from you I learned to encourage people, to compliment them, to build them up, and brighten their day when at all possible. You taught me to pass it on. Your words of encouragement to me as a student made a difference in my thought patterns and in my life. Your approach to life was positive and I received a lot.”

Fred wrote much on character. This week’s piece is taken from a letter he wrote to his mentor, Maxey Jarman, expressing his thoughts and appreciation.

Follow the Leader

One’s character is largely determined by those whom they follow. Heroes are profitable. “Lives of great men all remind us we can make our life sublime and departing leave behind us, footprints in the sands of time.” Tearing down heroes isn’t helpful; it is dangerous. I am most interested in a man’s heroes. It tells me much about what he wants to become.

It is the rate of build up, not the tear down, which determines a man’s progress.

Your example of duty fulfillment is now a part of my life. I admire it in you. I copied it, not as perfectly as you demonstrated it, but enough so it a genuine part of my own character. My miniature copy is real. As A.W. Tozer said, “My flame may be small, but it is real.”

Your love for work is also something I caught from you. You were the first to get me to experience the excitement of accomplishment. Other had tried, but you succeeded. Why they failed, I don’t know. Somehow I could accept and be challenged by your example. It certainly isn’t because you talked me into it. You rarely talked about it; you just did it.

My responsibility is to set an example for those looking to me. I don’t know who is watching. We never do, do we? It is really frightening.

One night I was walking across the Baylor campus when a young man caught up and said, “Mr. Smith, today I decided to be another Fred Smith.” I didn’t feel complimented – I felt the weight of the responsibility. At that moment I wished I were all I’ve ever had the potential for being. He rushed on and I never knew who he was or what he has become.

It is not egotistical to want to live a life worth following. Our friend Paul said, “Follow me as I follow my leader.” Knowing that we are examples becomes a driving force, doesn’t it?

This week consider: 1) Who am I following? 2) What character traits are most important to me? 3) Where are the holes in my character?

Words of Wisdom: “It is not egotistical to want to live a life worth following.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Jesus said to them, “Follow me, and I will turn you into fishers of people.” (Mark 1: 17 NET Bible)

Balanced Spirituality

Brenda’s Blog – March 10, 2026

“The boy didn’t make it snow – God did!” My three year old grandson Will had it right. The story told of a little boy who badly wanted snow. His Grandfather told him to try all sorts of silly things to bring down the white, fluffy stuff. Nothing worked. Finally, he did a snow dance and sure enough, the rain turned into flakes and covered the ground. “I did it! I made it snow!”

Without even a word, my grandson looked me in the eye and reminded me of the true truth.

His candor reminded me of a cold, snowy Christmastime in Dallas when I parked the car in a crowded mall lot, went in with my grandson Andrew to enjoy time together. When we left it was dark, and I couldn’t remember where I parked. We walked and walked and walked. Finally, Andrew spotted the car! “Thank you, Jesus” was my response. “How come you thanked Jesus? I found the car!”

There is a balance, isn’t there? Taking credit for weather conditions is foolish. Failing to acknowledge the diligence of a 9 year old is negligent.

I truly believe God is evident in all things. I believe He allowed Andrew the joy of finding the car. And, I also believe He gave Will the insight to understand who is the true maker of weather.

Showing Andrew the power of prayer and the joy of being the beneficiary of God’s providential grace was the “teachable moment” that cold December night. Celebrating with Will in his belief in our sovereign God allowed us a time to share the goodness and awesomeness of this same God.

As the Mom of three young ones I didn’t have the patience or strength to look for these spiritual vignettes. Aging brings the blessing of perspective. I thank the Lord for these “wee bites” which strengthen my heart and stretch them.

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