Attention, Please!

Brenda’s Blog – October 7, 2025

Attention, Please!

“K-mart shoppers! Your attention, please. For the next 30 minutes there will be a ‘blue light special’ on aisle 3!” Those words would send people scurrying to see what bargains awaited them on aisle 3.

Camp directors hold up their hands with three fingers lifted to indicate campers have to the count of three to get quiet. In a leadership retreat recently, the host was a retired camp director who simply held up his hand to signal the break was over – all the non-profit executive directors and board members immediately responded.

Teachers flip the lights off and on to gain control and indicate all eyes are to be up front and all conversation is to end.

When I was a teenager and a date would last too long in the driveway (according to my Mom), the porch light would begin its “you better get out of that car and get in this house” routine. She knew how to get my attention (and probably that of my puzzled date).

In Luke 9 the doctor tells the story of being on the mountain with Jesus and experiencing the appearance of Moses and Elijah who joined Jesus. Peter was exhilarated. You could almost see him in his holy extroversion jumping around. “Let’s make tents for them!” Scripture says, “Peter didn’t know what he was saying.” Can’t you just see the fisherman babbling on and on?

What happens then? God speaks from a cloud which descended on them. “This is my Son, my Chosen One, listen to him!” In the South we would say, “Hush, Peter, God is talking to you!”

How does God get our attention? We don’t audibly hear Him as He speaks to us in a cloud. But His Word is powerful, intentional, and indeed purposeful. We can hear Him saying to us, “Be quiet, be still” in Psalm 46. We can read of the turbulent waves obeying Jesus as He instructs them to settle down. Our choppy waters are under His control.

And doesn’t He click lights on and off sometimes when we are wandering? The work of the Spirit gives nudges and sometimes not-so-gentle corrections to lead us to repentance. And especially in those times when we get too sure of ourselves and get ahead of Him, we recognize His revectoring.

The heavenly whistle blows and we line up if we are listening. The Word reorders our messy lives if we will only look to His plan. “Listen to Him!” Our loving heavenly Father calls us to obedience knowing true life is only in following Him.

The Providence of Coincidence

Weekly Thought – October 7, 2025

Fred lived a life of intentionality. He believed in the value of time and energy. Yet he chose to avoid a driven lifestyle. He encouraged others to enjoy seeing God’s plan unfold without trying to force His hand.

The Providence of Coincidence

I got a call from a men’s retreat I had led for several years on the West Coast. My physical condition kept me from being there in person, so they wanted to set up a phone call allowing me to say a few words and stay connected to the group. Over the many years this group and I had established a close relationship.

However, because the location was in the mountains there was serious difficulty with the phone connection. Even though they had one of the top professional soundmen working on the project, they were unable to access the venue’s phone lines. Without that they couldn’t set up the system to make the call go through.

Just as the technician was saying it was impossible to make the connection a man and his son walked in the door to attend the retreat. The man was there as a participant, but in his business life he was with the telephone company. They “happened” to drive up in his telephone truck and had all the tools and equipment needed to make this work. He even had the spurs in the truck which he needed to climb the telephone pole!

The next step was to talk with the next door neighbor asking for her patience and permission to disrupt her TV service during the phone call. She graciously invited the man and his son, offered them homemade lemonade – and even hugged them after hearing the story and wishing them well at the front door. Mission accomplished!

When they called me it was clear as a bell from both sides. So many things continued to happen that night “against all odds.” If you looked at the evening the numbers just didn’t add up. Even skeptics would have difficulty attributing it all to coincidence. I have seen them admit that certainly something greater than chance was at work. Years ago in looking at these situations I decided to coin a phrase “beyond arithmetic.” I used it to point to times when random and haphazard just don’t fit. When God connects the dots we can smile and simply say, “I knew that was you!”

This week consider: 1) How quickly do I recognize providence? 2) Where has God connected the dots in my life? 3) How can I train my family to look for God’s hand in their lives?

Words of Wisdom: “When God connects the dots we can smile and simply say, ‘I knew that was you!’”

Wisdom from the Word: “But Jesus looked at them and said, ‘With man this is impossible. But with God all things are possible.’” (Matthew 19:26 NET Bible)

The Wise Reader

Weekly Thought – September 30, 2025

Fred believed one of the key elements of maturity came through reading, association, and travel. Almost monthly he received books on a wide variety of topics from friends and acquaintances. He appreciated their thoughtfulness, but he had a basic principle: “I do not feel the obligation to read a book just because someone sends it to me. I also do not believe reading requires me to start at the beginning and complete the entire book. I search for the excerpts which are helpful.”

The Wise Reader

In a book I read recently the author says that some people get to age 35 or 40 and then level off in terms of their personal accomplishments, never climbing any higher. He said that during the younger part of your life, just being alive is enough to drive you forward, but that energy begins to wane. Unless you have a spiritual drive that urges you forward, the physical runs out and you peak.

One of the sources of motivation for me is reading. We can’t keep up without it. Let me ask you something: “What do you read? Do you read objectively? Do you say what do I need to read to improve?” Until you do, you miss the best of reading.
Of course, it is impossible to read everything. I learned a long time ago that my particular interests and gifts are in three areas: theology, philosophy, and psychology. I am an eclectic reader and intrigued by ideas, but since I am a slow reader, concentrate my reading in these three areas. Make clear decisions about what you read and why.

I wear glasses and maybe you do, too. Mine probably cost about the same as yours. Would you trade lenses with me just because I asked you to? Of course not! That would be silly because yours fit you and mine fit me. Reading works the same way. Are you reading what the boss is reading or are you reading what fits you? Are you reading a book because someone sent it to you or because it was on the best seller list?

You wouldn’t wear someone else’s glasses so don’t let someone else’s interests, enjoyment, or career direction determine the use of your reading time.

Understand what your purpose is for reading and carefully discipline your choices.

This week think about: 1) What three books have most profoundly influenced me? 2) What am I reading right now? 3) How would I begin a conversation with my favorite author?

Words of Wisdom: “Make clear decisions about what you read and why?”

Wisdom from the Word: “Then books were opened, and another book was opened – the book of life.” (Revelation 20:12(b) NET Bible)

Making Good Decisions

Weekly Thought – September 23, 2025

Fred expertly made decisions. He skillfully separated the objective from the subjective modes. One of his frequently used “Fred Saids” was “keep current on the facts.” He emphasized the importance of correct data in the process.

Making Good Decisions

Our life is a network of decisions. A few are vital, but many are less important. For example, the choice of a spouse and the decision to have children are two of life’s most critical decisions. Buying a new suit may seem to be critical at the moment but unless your choice creates a serious fashion faux pas it falls into the “middle of the road” category. As I say this I think of an impertinent waitress in our vacation home’s local restaurant… “Well Mr. Smith, I see you dressed yourself this morning.”

Decision making is both an art and a science. There are a few who are intuitively gifted to do this well by being able to see the problem and possible solutions in the same exercise. Charles Kettering, the automotive genius said, “A problem well defined is half solved.” One of my mentors often said, “The secret of good decisions is in knowing all the options.” His process was to outline them all and then choose the best one.

Before Robert McNamara when he was president of the Ford Motor Company was well known for his practice of accepting a colleague’s suggestion, then quickly responding, “What other possibilities did you reject in order to accept this one?” Many times the individual would have to admit that the one offered was the first one to be considered. McNamara would then end the conference and excuse the person to go back and consider other alternatives.

In order to pick good options, you first have to know the object of the decision: what is it supposed to solve; does it apply to the problem or to the possibilities.

I try to first define the current reality by establishing the current facts… not what I wish they were, but what they actually are. Then I think about how each option can be implemented and activated. Solutions that cannot be executed are impractical and unusable. I have seen executive decision makers who put policies in place which were unenforceable and subsequently made management look weak.

A good decision is structurally sound and effectively executed.

Carefully consider this week: 1) What decisions do I have before me this week? 2) How do I establish my priorities? 3) Who models effective decision making for me?

Words of Wisdom: “I try to first define the current reality by establishing the current facts… now what I wish they were, but what they actually are.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Now give me wisdom and discernment so I can effectively lead this nation. Otherwise no one is able to make judicial decisions for this great nation of yours.” (2 Chronicles 1:10 NET Bible)

Older, But Never Old

Brenda’s Blog – September 23, 2025

“Growing older is not the closing act. It can be the most exquisite chapter – if you let yourself bloom again.” These words from British actress Patricia Routledge at age 95 reminded me of an article written by my Dad. His attitude on aging continues to teach me as I am now heading toward 82. Insurance companies tell me 81 is my life expectancy.

That is just an actuarial statistic. Life in those years is a gift from God; living those years is a choice made by each individual. Every believer in Jesus I know uses a familiar phrase: “finishing well.” This means running the race with grace and hope, knowing our days are numbered by the Almighty God.

Several years ago I started thinking about the rhythm of life. A prominent female executive challenged me to analyze my career and recognize the pattern. Her study showed a 5 year career template. She outlined it for me. “Every five years I have made a serious, consequential career move. It didn’t necessarily mean changing companies, just responsibilities and direction.”

That intrigued me, so I began a search of my own. It was put on hold for decades, but as I turned 70, I sat down and figured out my life had a 21 year rhythm. I broke the years down 1-21, 22-43, 44-65, and 66-present. I put one word or phrase next to each category. Then I broke each into sub-categories of 7(+ or -) years to further study each group. When I completed the analysis, I looked at the final group (known as the present) to create a game plan for finishing well. (If you want more details on this life exercise, just email me Brendaasmith@aol.com)

Patricia Routledge’s words: “Let these years ahead be your ‘treasured years.’ You don’t need to be famous. You don’t need to be flawless. You only need to show up – fully – for the life that is still yours. With love and gentleness.”
With God’s grace and mercy I will live out the final season of 21 years. With the faithful witness of those who have gone ahead of us, and with the hope of running well, older, but never old will be my testimony. I will be the woman God created me to be, using the gifts He gave to bring glory to Himself and blessing to all.

The Blood of Life

Weekly Thought – September 16, 2025

Fred moved from earth to heaven on August 17, 2007 at 9:15 AM. Three days a week for the last 8 years he traveled to a dialysis center where his blood was circulated and cleansed. The lessons he learned during those sessions were often used as illustrations in his speaking. This week he tells a personal story never before related before being used in the Elliott Class of the Highland Park Methodist Church in the late 1980s or early 1990s.

The Blood of Life

Sometimes you keep stories to yourself because they are very personal. Sometimes the deep satisfaction they reflect keeps them private. This is a story from my early manhood I have never told before – simply because it was extremely personal and very satisfying. It didn’t need any broadcasting.

When I was a young man in the life insurance business I went into a lawyer’s office where an attorney and his daughter practiced together. As I spoke with them they were obviously upset, and asked me what my blood type was. A very strange question from a prospective client indeed. But I could tell by their faces they sincerely needed my answer. When I answered his question he replied, “That is exactly what we need!” After a moment he continued, “My brother is dying in St. Thomas Hospital right now and desperately needed a blood transfusion immediately. The attorney went on to ask, “Would you give him some of yours?”

We immediately got into their car, traveling to the Nashville hospital. Without doing anything than taking off my suit coat and laying down on a cot beside the brother’s hospital bed they directly transferred my blood to him without modern processing because the need was so urgent.

He lived and expressed great appreciation for my willingness to help him. He even offered to pay me for the donation.
He and his family saw the effect the gratitude had on me. They understood I didn’t want payment. In fact, it would have been inappropriate. I never saw him again; I never heard from any of his family members, either. But I experienced total, real satisfaction.

When our souls were in need of a donation for our salvation, Jesus shed His blood. When our souls were perishing His blood provided a way for us to access eternal life. Christ gave us something that we cannot buy – we can only receive it by faith – namely His grace. Growing up in the home of a Southern Baptist pastor the hymns were a constant companion. I will always remember the booming voice of my preacher father… “Would you be free from the burden of sin? There’s power in the blood!”

This week carefully consider: 1) What does the “blood of Christ” mean to me? 2) Who has benefited from a spiritual infusion? 3) Where am I applying the power of the blood in my life?

Words of Wisdom: “Sometimes you keep stories to yourself because they are so private.”

Wisdom from the Word: “But if we walk in the light as He himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another and the blood of Jesus cleanses us from all sin.” (1 John 1:7 NET Bible)

Fundamental People Principles

Weekly Thought – September 9, 2025

Fred thought in principles. He aptly applied discernment, understanding, and experience to fundamental principles. He often said: “Principles never change; just the illustrations.” His well-disciplined study of human nature and his ever alert view of human behavior gave him ample “material” as he would say.

Fundamental People Principles

Here are three simple things I have learned about people:

1.) It is a total waste of time trying to correct other people’s mistakes. I should use the time to utilize their strengths and buttress their weaknesses. Too many training courses focus the majority of the time on overcoming weaknesses – a complete misunderstanding of human nature and effective management.
2.) You can’t change anybody else. Each person has to change himself or herself – you can’t do it for them. You can set up pressures or you can be alert to opportunities for encouragement, but the action can’t be taken for another. You might even create fear that will cause a temporary change, but nothing permanent. We spend an awful lot of time putting temporary situations in place, thinking we have changed a person but in the end it is an inefficient, ineffective short term fix.
3.) People are the way they are because they want to be that way. I haven’t always believed that. In fact, when I started out in life I wanted to be a social worker… until I became extremely disillusioned with people. Now I am totally convinced each of us is responsible for our choices. Instead of operating from this principle, we rationalize and give all sorts of reasons that people are not the product of their own decisions. One thing I have clearly observed: we do this for ourselves, as well.

When we have an opportunity to change and don’t take it, the decision is being made to stay in the same place. On the other hand, when you go through personal challenges without hiding, rationalizing, or running away, a decision is being made to grow and mature. The person who comes through is the person of choice.

Finally, people who want to change make a plan knowing growth doesn’t “just happen.” Conversely, people who avoid planning and just “go with the flow” often treat the lack of change, opportunity, or maturity with rationalization.

As I like to say, “Principles never change; just the illustrations.” These simple fundamentals can work as a skeleton for effective personal relations. Each interaction will have its own set of particulars (or illustrations). I find practice is the key to mastering these principles.

This week carefully consider: 1) How well do I understand people? 2) Which simple principle is most helpful for me this week? 3) Where in scripture can we find substantiation?

Words of Wisdom: “Principles never change; just the illustrations.”

Wisdom from the Word: “And all who heard Jesus were astonished at his understanding and his answers.” (Luke 2:27 NET Bible)

Last Words

Brenda’s Blog – September 9, 2025

“Wasn’t that a beautiful service? I took notes.”

I chuckled as I overheard the elevator conversation between two “golden agers.” We had all attended the memorial service of a prominent member of our community.

Recently, some of my coffee time friends and I laughed about the cycle of life. “When our girls were younger, I took notes on weddings adding ideas for theirs when the time came. As I sat in a memorial service last year I thought, “Oh, I would like that for my service.” I guess most of us are planners to the end – and beyond.

A friend said she reads obituaries for ideas. She jots down phrases which fit into her “picture perfect” last words for the back page of the program whose layout is a “best of” collection.

“Curated” is a word which describes the gathering of items, ideas, furniture, and even groups. At this stage of life it aptly describes the way we prepare for the way we are presented to those left behind. “I want to make sure my service, my obituary, and all the arrangements are just what I want. I don’t want anyone else deciding how it should be done.” As if she is going to be sitting on the front row!

Very few of the residents of my community grew up here (nor did I). Our friendships began at retirement age. We know little of their life stories, accomplishments, and journeys until we read the obituaries. “I wish I had known him/her when they were younger. I had no idea of those stories.” How much we missed.

Capturing a lifetime in a few expensive newspaper paragraphs is impossible. But it does cause us to think carefully about what really matters. What do we want people to know, remember, or understand? Where are the important steps and starts? Where are the points of grace?

Let’s think about those answers.

Entering the Throne Room

Weekly Thought – September 2, 2025

(On September 1, 1915 Fred was born to Mathew Bunyan and Amye Smith 110 years ago.)

Fred demonstrated the power of prayer. He believed in it and practiced it diligently. Prayer was also very private for him. A lifetime memory for his children is seeing him on his knees beside their bed before sleep. He faithfully followed the habit taught by his parents. The image of humility was permanently affixed. Mary Alice carefully noted her earnest requests for her family, their safety, their security, and their “sanctification.”

Entering the Throne Room

Prayer is both marvelous and mysterious. How marvelous hat a sinner saved by grace can at any time commune with the Lord Almighty, Creator of heaven and earth. In the night when I awake and am tempted by frustration, it is so comforting to be able to talk to the Lord about it.

I am not alone in my experience. One of the psychiatrists who helped select the first astronauts told me how they tested them in total isolation seeing how much they could withstand. He said some could go indefinitely, and when they examined them, they found that they were the ones who could pray. If we would only realize our opportunity for direct communication with the Lord, how much more we would do it.

I have found expressing gratitude to God gives me great satisfaction. Surprisingly, I have also found it has increased my self-respect. It is so much easier to live with myself as a person who is grateful, rather than a complainer and whiner.

Mysterious is the nature of intercessory prayer. How can my request impact God’s love for others? Yet we are instructed to pray for one another. Realistically, I would be frustrated if I could not pray for others when I feel there is nothing else I can do for them. Often people will say, “At least I can pray for you.” I always want to remind them praying is the most they can do for me.

I have never felt that the number of people praying for a person or situation is the vital point. I do not think God is a politician who is swayed by numbers or polls. And I definitely do not believe God is impressed with celebrity. Thinking getting famous Christians on your prayer team doesn’t get your request moved to the top of the pile. I remember the widow whose life was terrifically limited, but all of us wanted her to pray because we knew she had suffered hardship, and deprivation while trusting wholly in God.

When we say, “I will be praying for you” it is a serious commitment. Promising to join the company and community of the committed through prayer is entering into the mystery of the faith. Voicing the willingness to join with others around the throne is speaking the intention of sharing the marvelous and mysterious presence on behalf of another.

This week carefully consider: 1) How real is prayer for me? 2) Who has asked me to pray for them? 3) What does my prayer list look like?

Words of Wisdom: “I have found expressing gratitude to God gives me great satisfaction.”

Wisdom from the Word: “When you seek me in prayer and worship, you will find me available to you. If you seek me with all your heart and soul.” (Jeremiah 29:13 NET Bible)

Minutes that Count

Brenda’s Blog – August 26, 2025

“Mommy’s outside having her Jesus minutes.”

As a young married with a toddler daughter, our Sunday School at First Baptist Church, Nashville, was a lifeline. Our teachers were an “older couple” in their late 30s who shepherded us well. How we loved them!

One afternoon I stopped by their house for a short shot of encouragement. When the front door opened, their nine year old daughter smiled and told me, “Mommy’s outside having her Jesus minutes.” I knew her source of strength, so I thanked the precious daughter and left. I never ever forgot that sweet answer to “Is your Mommy home?”

It makes me think about the minutes of my days. If someone comes to my door, what would they find? “Brenda is having her TV minutes… Brenda is having her Facebook minutes… Brenda is having her finding the last piece of chocolate minutes… Or, even Brenda is having her missing her family minutes, and yes, Brenda is having her Jesus minutes.”

Studies keep telling us how our brains are being affected by hours of screen absorption. It reminds me of what Scripture tells us. The transformation of our character is activated by our thoughts. What we see, read, think about, and talk about are foundational to our character.

Time matters. The more minutes (hours) we devote to an endeavor, the more it affects the outcome. As children, we were directed to invest time, not spend it, because it was a non-replenishable resource. How we choose to invest our days is a predictor of what the years will hold. When we look at our calendars we glimpse our values, and our life patterns.

In this fast-paced culture it is easy to speed through day by day without stopping to audit the use of that time. Making the most of the time God has designed for us is a stewardship. Learning to make minutes grow into days of contribution and value comes through watchcare.

May each of us stay faithful.

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