Weekly Thought – July 15, 2025

Fred understood the gifts God gave him. He called them his “uniqueness.” He challenged others to identify and nurture their own. He firmly grasped the concept of rhythm in life and leadership writing and speaking about its effective use.

Keeping the Engine in Gear

During times when we have no great career accomplishments, it is important to have outside achievements. This is the way to re-attach our ego and grow again.

A friend came to see me after selling his company. He was experiencing the “what’s next” low. I suggested he find satisfaction through a non-career endeavor. Several months later I saw him. To my surprise, he was 40 pounds lighter and walking with a distinctly positive gait.

“Fred, I took your suggestion. Not only have I lost the 40 pounds I carried around for so long, but I am the club doubles tennis champion.” He rediscovered the joy of achievement.

Every career has its dead spots. Inevitably, there are idling times as we hit plateaus on the climb. It is critical to remember we haven’t failed – just our plans have. Rather than throwing us off track, we can redirect our productive energies in an avocational direction. For example, we can channel our drive into ministry, or community leadership. It is important to acknowledge the value of productivity.

The lull in the career won’t extinguish the proper use of ego gratification. Of course, it is key that these ancillary accomplishments don’t become an escape. Recognizing that they are part of career rhythm should always be uppermost. Running away and hiding is not the healthy use of avocation during vocational valleys.

The overriding principal: keep on experiencing a productive rhythm in life in order to contribute. Accomplishment and achievement are the mature use of our God-given uniqueness which is to be used for the good of others.

If we miss the opportunity to grow in the plateaus we end up simply going round and round without forward progress. The proper use of these times is to refocus, clarify, and strengthen in order to keep climbing.

The mature man or woman recognizes achievement breeds achievement.

This week carefully consider: 1) How do I satisfy my need for accomplishment? 2) What strategies do I use in the plateau times? 3) Where are my avocational as well as vocational growth areas?

Words of wisdom: “Running away and hiding is not the healthy use of avocation during vocational valleys.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Then they will realize this is your work, and that you, LORD, have accomplished it.” (Psalm 109:27 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – June 17, 2025

Fred often differentiated between goals and direction. In consulting and mentoring he stressed the importance of understanding the nature of direction.

Reading Life’s Mile Markers

Choosing a goal in life is not our most important decision; choosing our direction is. Chasing short-range goals can take us in the wrong direction. Mature success and satisfaction come from the direction in which we move, not in the goals we attain.

Too much goal orientation brings us the same problem Harvard Business School found in the “case study” format for instruction. Bright young students learned to solve problems rather than identifying opportunities. The real progress in life comes in the recognition of potential. Problem solving is certainly key, but it part of the process of seizing opportunities. Too much focus on goal-orientation allows us to become almost mechanical in our approach to life. The totally technological perspective on life threatens to turn us into computers. Who would want that?

I oppose setting an ultimate goal for one’s life. I do not support a specific, definable, measurable place in life. In this I mean material, educational, professional accomplishments, and certainly not character and spiritual maturity aims. When one in essence says “By 45 I will have a net worth of $X, a country club membership, a luxury car, and a notable career,” it creates a system for decision making locked in by these markers.

In my experience I have seen the futility of those who used a deterministic mindset actually achieving the goals (many times before the due date) only to recognize a huge letdown. They climbed the mountain, assuming success would create fulfillment, but when they checked off the goals they realized it was too limited.

I am not opposed to planning, but I am much more interest in making decision based on the impact they will have on who I will ultimately become if I take the path being considered. I don’t want to be so focused on goals that I get to the top of the ladder only to see it is leaning against the wrong wall. A high achieving young executive stopped by the office to tell me, “I know my direction and I also know I need to seriously review my progress and revector as needed. Just a minimal move away from the chosen direction if not corrected can create disaster eventually.”

Goals are important as mile markers to confirm we are traveling in the right direction. But, I am convinced they are not to be an end in themselves.

This week seriously consider: 1) What work have I done to establish my life direction? 2) How do I answer “Am I satisfied with who I am becoming?” 3) Who serves as a model for a healthy life style?

Words of Wisdom: “The becoming is the joy in the journey.”

Wisdom from the Word: “I hereby guide you in the way of wisdom and I lead you in upright paths.” (Proverbs 4:11 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – June 10, 2025

Fred joined a team of Baptist businessmen which formed the “Focus Week” movement in the 1950s and 1960s. He and an outstanding gathering of other dynamic professionals, scientists, physicians, academicians, entrepreneurs, and executives spent time with students on various Baptist university campuses all through the year. Fred thoroughly enjoyed these five day marathons with nonstop classroom assignments, meal times, night sessions, and chapels. In 2007 the Breakfast with Fred Leadership Institute began, built on the structure and spirit of Focus Week.

Doing My Best

As Christians we need to remember God is interested in our work. He commands us to pursue excellence, avoiding “being slothful.” In our chosen business. I am sure He is hurt when we slip into mediocrity, standing around the water cooler complaining, or wasting time on personal cell phone calls. When we use company computers on company time against policy, we dishonor Him. Scripture tells us “whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all of your might, as unto the Lord.” Notice it doesn’t say, “If you enjoy your work, like the boss, enjoy your associates” then it is a good thing. That is not what scripture says. If we are going to put our life into it, then we should do it to the very best of our ability. The attitude of “unto the Lord” gives work a divine significance.

Christian executive, Mason Roberts, former President of Frigidaire, shared with me his daily closing ritual. He had a calendar on his desk with these words inscribed: “Having done my best today, it will be easier to do better tomorrow.” At the end of the day he would put his hand on the calendar, say a short prayer of thanksgiving for the day, tear the sheet off and throw it in the wastebasket, and go home. On those rare days when he could not honestly give thanks for doing his best, he would call his wife, ask her to delay dinner, and work until he found satisfaction.

It is our responsibility to bring meaning to our work. We can do it in three ways: 1)in being excellent in what we do which gives us self-respect and security; 2) in the attitude we bring to the job which helps to create a positive environment; 3)in seeing our associates as those we can encourage and perhaps even bring to the Lord.

This week carefully consider: 1) How do I measure “doing my best”? 2) What is my motivation in my work? 3) When do I feel “God’s pleasure” in my work?

Words of Wisdom: “The attitude of “unto the Lord” gives work a divine significance.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Whatever you are doing, work at it with enthusiasm, as to the Lord and not for people,” (Colossians 3:23 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – May 13, 2025

Fred told his family in a conversation about his death: “I don’t want you to need me; I want you to love me.” He didn’t want dependence, but he greatly appreciated devotion.

Living Through Love

Love creates an environment that strengthens the will to live. Love brings joy to our life when there is little to rejoice about. We appreciate being loved so much that we sometimes forget the responsibility that comes with being loved. Those who love us want us to live, not die. We often talk about pursuing a life worth living, and I am convinced that understanding the value of love is a tremendous part of that endeavor. Many tell me I am too strong-willed to die, but I believe that the realization I can contribute and I am loved gives me purpose.

Doctors say that many old people who are reportedly died of “natural causes” really die of loneliness. Current medical research shows that we can literally die of broken hearts. Conversely, studies show that people who receive care and prayer tend to live longer and richer lives than those who don’t.

Just as God’s greatest gift to us is His love, so out greatest gift to one another should be our love one for another – and for Him. Love does not need to be earned; it is given. And so, no matter how incapacitated we are, we can still experience being loved – and loving.

Love is the strongest sustaining emotion we can fell. Acts of love are as important as the words of love. One of my favorite times in the day is when my daughter, comes in, pats me on the arm, kisses me on the forehead, and says, “I will see you in the morning.” When I was pronounced dying by my doctor, she said, “No, I will take him home and he will live.” That is exactly what happened. There is power in love.

Even though my bride of 67 years is now in heaven, I still celebrate Valentine’s Day – for her.

This week think about: 1) Who do I love and who loves me? 2) How can I better understand the responsibilities of loving? 3) When do I sense the love of God?

Words of Wisdom: “I believe that the realization I can contribute and I am loved gives me purpose to live.”

Wisdom from the Word: “I give you a new commandment—to love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” (John 13:34 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – April 29, 2025

Fred especially appreciated a prayer written by William Barclay. In teaching and writing he broke down the phrases and drilled down into their application. This week features his thinking on the opening address.

Words To Live By

“Lord, grant us in our work, satisfaction; in our leisure, pleasure; in our study, wisdom; and in our love, loyalty.” I was so impressed with the balance of life he described that I easily memorized it. Through the years I have repeated it to myself many times and twice I have taught it as a Sunday School lesson. The first time I only taught the four requests. Later, I realized that I had missed the significance of the three opening words.

“Lord” – One of the major theological questions today is whether Christ can be Savior without being Lord. George Gallup did a survey among the “born again” and found that only 10 percent considered their faith in daily decision making. He wrote a book entitled “The Saints Among Us” indicating that 90 percent of us are nominal Christians.

“Grant” – This reminds us that all good and perfect gift come from above. We have no demands on God, only requests. Again, the Bible tells u that we have nothing but what we have received of God.” (See 1 Corinthians 4:7).

“Us” – This reminds us that Christianity is a community a Body, a family. It is not just an individual experience. It is not like the pine tree that can grow by itself. It is like the redwood that grows in a cluster of four with the roots supporting each other.

Gert Behanna was born and raised in the old Waldorf Astoria amid amazing wealth. After spending much of her life wedded to a lifestyle of drugs and alcohol, she came to Christ. When she prayed “Our Father” for the first time she realized she was part of a family. She gave most of her wealth to needy Christians whom she considered brothers and sisters.

“Lord, grant us” is a triad of infinite significance.

This week carefully consider: 1) Which word am I going to dwell on this week? 2) When do I experience being part of the family of God? 3) How can I be an influence for Christian maturity?

Words of Wisdom: “Christian community is not like the pine tree that can grow by itself.”

Wisdom from the Word: “For who concedes you any superiority? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you received it, why do you boast as though you did not?” (1 Corinthians 4:7 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – April 15, 2025

Fred respected those who corrected motivated by the desire for others to improve. The proper environment for criticism is an observation to help potential develop. He once offered a review of a musician’s performance with these words, “I know you want to be the best…” After which he commented on the strengths and weaknesses of the concert.

The Art of Criticism

Keep criticism positive. Recently, I tried to analyze the reasons for criticism. Three were negative and one positive.

1) We are passing the buck on a self-grudge. If before 10:00 in the morning I have been critical of everybody and everyone, I must stop and ask, “Fred, what is wrong with you? What are you mad at yourself about?” Generally, I have to go and make a call to somebody with an apology. My environment won’t straighten out until I quit being mad at myself and make it right.

2) We are trying to show superior knowledge. How often does someone show you a great idea and you respond enthusiastically until you suddenly say to yourself, “I can’t be too complimentary because he may feel he is as smart as I am.” So you say, “Joe this is a great idea, but…” Many “yes, buts” come from the desire to show your own superior knowledge or experience.

3) We are responding to performance that hasn’t made the grade. Those who start well, but don’t make the A-List usually become critics. You can’t put a failed executive back into the ranks – he/she will become a naysayer and negative influence.

4) We are desiring the other person to improve through our help. We can point out something he or she might not see. It is done quietly and kindly. Positive correction/criticism is not done in public, or even within earshot of others. Too often the negative models are expressed in front of as many as possible to the embarrassment of one and the poor judgement of the other. True, strong positive criticism is specific, and directly clearly toward the area that needs work for the sake of improvement.

The motive of positive criticism sets it apart from any of the negative forms. It is important to point out emotional stability is the foundation for the competent use of the positive and a quality every capable leader must have.

This week think about: 1) How do I react when I recognize a critical attitude in myself? 2) When is the best time for me to handle situations needing correction? 3) What are the triggers for my critical attitude?

Words of Wisdom: “Many “yes, buts” come from the desire to show your own superior knowledge or experience.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Speech that heals is like a life-giving tree, but a perverse speech breaks the spirit.” (Proverbs 15:4 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – April 8, 2025

Fred appreciated and applied grace generously. In his last days he made phone calls from his hospital bed to several lifelong friends. He spoke briefly to each one; he frequently would respond to their gracious words with “thank you, but remember, I am just a sinner saved by grace.”

The Glory of Grace

Grace was genuine, real, personal, and palpable to the great saints. Brother Lawrence, Frank Laubach, Francois Fenelon- these men never doubted they were the constant recipients of God’s amazing grace. Grace was a practical part of their everyday lives.

For example, Brother Lawrence said that when he made a mistake he didn’t spend any time thinking about it – he confessed it and moved on. Before I read that, I had been trapped by guilt… after all immediate grace was too good to be true. Brother Lawrence’s experience greatly released me.

Nevertheless, legalism appeals to our common sense and reasoning. I find it necessary to remind myself that the very Scripture that makes me know my sin and guilt lets me know God’s grace. By refusing grace we play God, creating a disciplinary system by and for ourselves. We view events as punishment. We anticipate correction and interpret it to fit our penal model. We fail to see that actions have consequences and we may just be experiencing the natural results, not a divine penalty.

Why do we do this? Usually because we feel we deserve judgment rather than grace. Grace brings freedom. If we could only follow Brother Lawrence by confessing, receiving His freedom, and moving on “gracefully.” Since grace cannot be deserved why should I feel others are worthy of its gift, but not I? Or why should I ever feel they are not worthy when I am?

Thinking we can be mature in Christ apart from grace is nothing more than foolish immaturity.

The Bible tells me we should not think too highly of ourselves, but it doesn’t advocate “worm thinking,” either. We are objects of grace; grace is a faith gift coming from and through the Father of light.

My great friend Steve Brown once told me his friend Jack Miller summed up the Christian message: “Cheer up, you’re a lot worse than you think you are; and Cheer up, God’s grace is a lot bigger than you think it is.”

This week think carefully consider: 1) When did grace become real for me? 2) How quickly do I show grace to others? 3) Who needs to know grace is God’s gift?

Words of Wisdom: “Grace was a practical part of their everyday lives.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Grace be with you all. “ (Hebrews 13:25 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – April 1, 2025

Fred asked a question during a men’s retreat which spoke to their thinking on balanced living. “Are you driving with a distinct vibration in your operating system? Time control was of key interest to these attendees. Here are several illustrations from Fred.

The Balanced Life

Oftentimes I see people whose lives are simply out of balance. Years ago I was driving my 280ZX (proof of teenage residue) when suddenly I lost a balance on the right front wheel. Here was my dilemma: I could drive at 45mph or less and be stable, or go 65 and shake myself to pieces. This is the picture I have when I see so many people who definitely cannot go more than 45 without shaking and yet they are determined to go into career traffic traveling at 65 mph. If they could only stop, or knew to stop and get the little balance on the life wheel fixed they could be back all on the road. If you are balanced for 45 but insist on 65, you have to get a repair.

A recurring theme among leaders is getting back to the “simple life,” which usually comes down to the allocation of time. I laugh when people tell me they didn’t have time to attend their company’s time control seminar. I find many fail to understand the proper use of time and the value of delegation. Often mistake-prone clutter is illustrative of those who misunderstand the concept of leadership, particular talents, and the nature of building an effective team. Being the leader who is known as the “hardest worker” and the one who turns off the lights at night has tragically missed the point of leadership. Knowing our strengths and focusing on them is critical.

My philosophy has been: Do what only I can do and delegate the rest. I focus on my strengths and move everything else to the periphery.
So much is written about “the balanced life.” Reducing stress sells lots of books. An authentic life must have tension. If a living plant didn’t have the pressure of capillary action nutrients would never move from the roots to the leaves. One of my favorite books is Stress Without Distress. Balance doesn’t mean living life in neutral. Nor does balance mean all areas of life have equivalent focus. It does mean the integration of the parts make a complete whole. Integration should result in healthy living.

This week think about: 1) How long has it been since I evaluated my strengths? 2) What does a balanced life signify to me? 3) Who is an excellent role model for time management?

Words of Wisdom: “If you are balanced for 45 but insist on 65, you have to get a repair.”

Wisdom from the Word: “But as for you, be strong and don’t get discouraged, for your work will be rewarded.” (2 Chronicles 15:7 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – March 11, 2025

Fred answered a first-time question “Can we get together?” with “Meet me at Cindi’s Deli at 6:30.” It was his first step in evaluating the seriousness of the person. “Could we make it 8:00?” usually equated to a relational false start.

Breakfast with Fred became a buzz word for wisdom gathering among his broad network of learners and leaders. This week’s theme is from his 2007 book Breakfast With Fred. Though focused on executives these principles apply to every area of daily living.

Effective Self-Management

The hardest person on any executive’s team to supervise is himself/herself. The recognition is soon recognized that “my problem is me.”
If many people took the energy and intelligence they spend devising ways to avoid work and applied it toward building a work plan, they would be highly successful. One of the most important executive disciplines is cutting off escapes from effective work. Sadly, there are executives who are strategic about accomplishment avoidance. For example, a great many people study their jobs rather than work at them. Most people already know considerably more than they are actually using in the workplace. Education is not the problem – disciplined motivation is.

Another escape for most people is activity. They have not learned “results are the only excuse for activity.” Many people feel as day’s end that they are satisfied with their efforts when in fact they have just been busy. They are the chief of their local fire department putting out flames but never constructing buildings. They are on the run but never getting anywhere productive. Too many eat, belch, and run – like fire trucks with dirty engines. Little boys make lots of noise playing firemen but grown men and women need to put away their helmets.

In order to accomplish anything you must have a definite goal. Unless you can write it down it isn’t definite or specific. My mentor, Maxey Jarman, taught me that aimless verbal wandering has no power. Only when I put the goal on paper does it take shape. Until it is formed, it may be an idea of a direction, but it isn’t a goal. A ship with a lot of steam doesn’t get to port unless it stays on course.
Once the goal as been set, it must be pursued with a burning desire. The desire must be maintained and sustained with discipline.
(Editor’s note: Later in Fred’s life he changed his focus from strict goal setting to a clear understanding of direction. In fact, one of the questions he would ask emphasized the import of this element in successful living… “Are you satisfied with the direction you are going?” He often spoke of “revectoring” which was the way he described keeping keyed to “true north” and staying on direction. The popular trends of 3 or 5 year plans had less interest for him. He wanted to define his life mission and then measure “staying on course” with regular checks.)

This week think carefully about: 1) How disciplined am I about putting my goals and direction in writing? 2) What will it take to “get out of my own way?” 3) Who models productive activity rather than just busyness?

Words of Wisdom: “A ship with a lot of steam doesn’t get to port unless it stays on course.”

Wisdom from the Word: “May he grant your heart’s desire; may he bring all your plans to pass.” (Psalm 20:4 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – January 21, 2025

Fred used questions in consulting, mentoring, and personal development. He also used them as channel markers in his private search for integrity. This week we feature ten which he frequently asks.

Asking Questions

1. Do my motives have integrity? Integrity starts with motive. Rationalization does more to pollute integrity of motive than any other factor. Ends never justify illegal, unjust, or unethical means.
2. Am I ego-driven or responsibility motivated? Ego-driven people satisfy their ego from the cause while responsibility-motivated people sacrifice their ego to the cause.
3. Do I want the truth? It requires a tough mind and a strong heart to love truth. Integrity demands tying to know and love truth for its own sake.
4. Does my will control my feelings? Leadership demands a strong will – not a selfish or stubborn will- but a determined will to do what needs doing. By will we overcome our yen for pleasure and our satisfaction with mediocrity.
5. What is my source of joy? Hope expresses itself n joy. My personal definition of joy is “adequacy.” The struggle is finding a true security and complete adequacy in authentic, not synthetic sources.
6. Is my passion focused? Passion brings purpose unity, intensity, and concentration, assuring accomplishment. Passion gives depth, keeping us from the shallowness of mediocrity. Our lives become a welder’s torch rather than a grass fire.
7. How grateful am I? Gratitude expresses our vulnerability, and our dependence on others. It is an emotion with a short shelf life because we don’t like to be indebted.
8. Am I the pump or the pipe? The Holy Spirit if the pump and I am the pipe. The pipe never gets tired. When I try to substitute my power for God’s I become powerless, dissatisfied even frantic, and defeated.
9. Is grace real for me? When refuse grace, I am playing God and trying to punish myself. Grace brings freedom.
10. How is my relationship to God? When I wake up in the middle of the night, face myself, and assess my true connection, what is the bottom line? Am I growing in my desire to know Him? Am I thirsty for time with Him? Trusting Him is a measure of relationship.

This week carefully consider: 1) What questions do I ask myself to establish my integrity quotient? 2) Which of Fred’s questions hits home right now? 3) Who would benefit from their own audit?

Words of Wisdom: “He used questions as channel markers in his own private search for integrity.”

Wisdom from the Word: “May integrity and godliness protect me, for I rely on you.” (Psalm 25:21 NET Bible)