The Sporting Life

Weekly Thought – September 12, 2017

Fred followed sports and enjoyed the company of athletes. He appreciated the discipline and the “price they paid” they displayed. One of his closest friends, Bill Glass (founder of Behind the Walls prison ministry) exemplifies character and devotion. Recently, his lifetime love, wife Mavis Glass, went to heaven. Please pray for the Glass family.

The Sporting Life

Sports are valuable. They teach us not only how to play, but how to live. We see the value of opposition: mano v. mano, defense against offense. The one or the team who handles opposition best wins.

What if they decided to do away with the oppositional factor in sports? What if they decided to just play nice and not challenge each other? What if the quarterback stood still so it would be easier for the defense to sack him? The crowd would become the opposition, wouldn’t they? They would boo both teams and probably walk out of the stadium. The game is thrilling and exciting because of the tension and the one against another. Sports thrive on opposition.

Life is like that, too. As we face struggles and overcome, we grow and succeed. We get stronger as we shoulder one burden, shove aside one temptation, climb the hill of adversity – and claim the victory flag. Life with no challenge weakens us.

The hand is a miraculous creation… the oppositional thumb sets us apart from other creations. (Also, we have a soul… I haven’t wandered into evolutionary thinking). When the fingers press against the thumb we are able to life, grip, and twist. When we lose the use of those digits we are then crippled. When I was five I fell on a glass jar, severing the artery in my wrist. The inadequate medical care has taken the use of my right hand away. I can use it as a claw, but the smooth movement of thumb and finger doesn’t exist. I learned from a friend in the insurance business that disability claims for a thumb have a higher pay-out than for a regular finger. Opposition is important.

In life we learn to operate with opposition in such a way we maximize our efforts. We don’t look at it as an enemy, but see it as an opportunity for development. Just as positive stress and tension are necessary for a healthy life, the presence of opposition is crucial for proper growth. The confidence we experience as we learn to manage opposition well leads us to further wins.

Be thankful for opposition for it is key in success.

This week think about: 1) How often do I bemoan opposition rather than seeing its value? 2) What is creating an oppositional force in my life right now? 3) How can I maximize the adversity in my life?

Words of Wisdom: “We get stronger as we shoulder one burden, shove aside one temptation, climb the hill of adversity – and claim the victory flag.”

Wisdom from the Word: “In times of prosperity be joyful, but in times of adversity consider this: God has made one as well as the other, so that no one can discover what the future holds.” (Ecclesiastes 7:14 NET Bible)

The Will to Win

Weekly Thought – September 5, 2017

Fred processed continually. He looked at life through the lens of philosophy, psychology, and faith. He saw the nature of God and the nature of man as the groundwork for all worldviews and thought structures. He loved thinking and thankfully he preserved thousands of these thoughts and inklings for us.

Please know we are thankful for your support of BWF. Your support enables us to continue Fred’s legacy through these emails, the Breakfast with Fred Leadership Institute, and www.breakfastwithfred.com Financial gifts are tax deductible and deeply appreciated.

The Will to Win

Mary Alice and I have six grandchildren. Our three children keep us amply supplied with pictures. Mary Alice is now thoroughly enjoying the second generation and the opportunity to be a grandmother. I am grateful for them and all they represent. They are great pictures, but that isn’t what is important. It will be what the children see in themselves that matter. An eminent psychologist told me, “Fred, what a boy thinks it takes to be a man and what a girl thinks it takes to be a woman then tells me what I need to know to predict their behavior.”

But there is more – and something we can’t see in the photographs… the will to win, the drive to be a pro. Only time will show if they have the willingness to play hurt, to concentrate on becoming the best at one thing. I have always liked Paul’s focus: “This one thing I do.”
Just this week I was playing golf with the head of a marketing company who said, “We can now test for most things in a man’s ability and personality, but we can’t test to ascertain the price he is willing to pay for success.”

A highly successful executive and I were listening to world-class athlete Bob Richards tell what it meant to win an Olympic gold medal. My friend leaned over and whispered to me, “I may not be an Olympic winner on the outside, but I am one on the inside.” He has the will to win.

That is where the real champion starts for all of us. The desire, training, and ability to stay in there, lose, and then keep on coming on – that is the will. And this is not just an attribute of an athlete – this is seen in the factory, the home, the office, and in church life. We can all be pros.

When I look into the eyes of our grandchildren, I see promise and greatness (after all they do have our DNA), and I pray they will see in themselves a reason to pay the price of accomplishment and achievement. More than that, we want them to be people of character – that is the true win.

This week think about: 1) How serious am I about maximizing my gifts? 2) Who needs my encouragement and word of hope this week? 3) What is stopping me from doing my best?

Words of Wisdom: “That is where the real champion starts for all of us. The desire, training, and ability to stay in there, lose, and then keep on coming on – that is the will.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Not that I have already attained this – that is, I have not already been perfected – but I strive to lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus also laid hold of me.” (Philippians 3:12 NET Bible)

Persevere

Weekly Thought – August 29, 2017

Fred was born September 1, 1915. His was a childhood marked by economic depression, physical disability, and many moves. But he was also exposed to ideas, dreams, and goals which helped define his adult life. As he writes to this young man asking about ways to live successfully, Fred adds several “Don’ts” to the list of “Do”s. We will look at several in the next few weeks.

Persevere

Don’t give up. Once I was working with the great lawyer J. Mack Swigert on a difficult labor relations case. It was more than difficult – it looked impossible to me. Feeling the need for a mattress to fall on in the event we lost, I started listing the good reasons we might not win. He stopped he cold and quickly.

“Fred, it’s better to win – you don’t have to explain a win, and you can’t explain a loss.” He added, smiling “And the fees are better and paid more quickly for a win.” Yes, we won.

Don’t spend time giving up on thinking of reasons you should give up. Did you ever wonder why the follow-through in golf is so important? The “high finish” is what every great pro promotes. It doesn’t have anything to do with hitting the ball. It comes after the ball is struck. Then why worry about the follow-through? Simple. Follow-through shows you didn’t start stopping before making contact with the ball. Most casual golfers stop (or at least start stopping) the club before it hits the ball. When you finish high you know you accelerated through the ball as you should. The follow-through evidences not quitting. Just so, it is important to develop winning habits that won’t quit at the crucial moment, not even subconsciously.
You need to file this principle in your mental motivational muscles.

I once held a seminar for young men who had lost heavily in a serious economic downturn. For most, it was their first time to lose. Up until now they experienced upward progress with little or no losses. Many were confused and shaky. For this reason we billed the seminar “for losers, not quitters.” Losing is a temporary fact; quitting is an attitude. The film mogul Mike Todd once said, “I have been broke many times, but never poor.” Broke is in the pocket; poor is in the mind.

I have gained a reputation as a problem solver. Do you know what is the key? I assume there is a solution. Thinking there is no answer leads to almost certain death of creativity. It dulls the mental juices. When you operate from the position of knowing there is a solution – you just have to find it, your creativity kicks in. Now, it doesn’t mean the answer is always easy, or even the one you originally sought, but it does free you up to consider all alternatives. Keep on keeping on – it is a great habit.

This week think about: 1) How creative am I in solving problems? 2) Who has influenced my ability to persevere? 3) What would help me develop my “stick-to-it”?

Words of Wisdom: “Broke is in the pocket; poor is in the mind.”

Wisdom from the Word: “As a result we ourselves boast about you in the churches of God for your perseverance and faith in all the persecutions and afflictions you are enduring.” (2 Thessalonians 1:4 NET Bible)

Singing the Song

Brenda’s Blog – August 29, 2017

“That’s why we sing”

The bluegrass gospel group The Purple Hulls performed at the Big Sandy Music Hall in Texas last night. These twin sisters play multiple instruments, compose, and sing. Their professionalism is enhanced by their personable, authentic delivery. Fingers flew as they switched from banjo to guitar to mandolin and back again – over and over for two hours.

Their final number included the line “That’s why we sing.” Driving home I considered these words and started musing about my “why I sing.” Isn’t this a beautiful way to begin developing a purpose statement? Rather than impersonally listing strengths and weaknesses, wouldn’t it be fun to simply say “Why do I sing?”

Years ago I heard someone say, “Don’t die with your music in you.” As a Christian I don’t believe God takes me out until He has accomplished His purposes and finished His work. But I do know I have choices about the way I spend my time, use my gifts, and invest my money. I would like to leave shooting for a high C. As an alto moving toward tenor, this would indeed be a stretch!

The old gospel hymn says “I sing because I’m happy; I sing because I’m free. His eye is on the sparrow and I know He cares for me.” That is a good reason to sing.

Our song should express who we believe we are designed to be by God. Our song should resonate with praise for our Maker. The more we sing, the more convinced we should be about the fit. “This is my story, this is my song” wrote Fanny Crosby. Owning our song strengthens us.

Let’s sing our songs with fervor. Let’s eagerly vocalize our purpose.

Be Ye Doers

Weekly Thought – August 22, 2017

Fred encouraged results. He appreciated process and activity, but focused on the outcome. Those who came to him with lots of talk but nothing else found him to give little comfort. His training by Maxey Jarman deeply impacted his own path and that of many others.

Be Ye Doers

Make results your measure for activity. A friend had this wall motto: “Results is the only excuse for activity.” It sounds obvious, but amazingly few people are really results oriented. Most are satisfied with activity and best effort. They forget there are no medals for “best try.” Results count, not activity.

The best way to stay focused is to keep asking, “What am I really trying to accomplish?” My friend Baxter Ball, VP of Mobil put it into an arithmetical symbol “+4.” When he said, “Just give me the +4 he wanted to deal without any embellishments…” he wanted the nut of the matter. Don’t ask me where he got it. I just knew what he meant when he said it!

Many regale others (especially bosses) with the details of exhausting activity: how many miles they traveled, how tough the job is, how many hours they worked, etc. expecting this to make up for lack of activity. It is my experience that those who use activity to produce results downplay the preparation and highlight the outcome. Reports of poor production are often prefaced with excuses and rationalizations.

One of my more caustic friends was listening to a young executive tell how tired he was. The young employee went through how much trouble he had on the job, how difficult it was, and what unexpected problems arose. In the midst of this my friend interrupted, “Please show me the baby and don’t tell me about the labor pains.” I totally grabbed that and my children, business associates, and others who come for counsel will hear it if they start wandering down the activity trail instead of showing results.

I ask you, was my friend discourteous? No, not one bit. He was teaching results and not effort. Unfortunately, for many individuals and companies, this lesson is never learned. As an aside, I believe parents who reward and award where results do not exist are doing a disservice to their children. There is a clear line between parental encouragement and building a fantasy world of expectations. Children who try but do not accomplish will never be high achievers. A parent should learn how to find a child’s areas of strength and guide them to productive activity, not just activity.

On my wall is a plaque given to me by Mason Roberts when he was President of Frigidaire. “Having done my best today, it will be easier to do better tomorrow.” Each night as he left the office he would tear off a day on his desk calendar, thank God for the day and assess his progress. If, however, he didn’t feel he had accomplished enough, he would hang up his hat, sit down, and work until he felt comfortable enough to leave. For Mason, results mattered.

This week think about: 1) How can I manage myself to focus on results, not just activity? 2) What hinders my progress? 3) Where do I need to discipline my activity to produce more results?

Words of Wisdom: “Reports of poor production are often prefaced with excuses and rationalizations.”

Wisdom from the Word: “And there are different results, but the same God who produces all of them in everyone.” (1 Corinthians 12:6 NET Bible)

Trading Hat

Weekly Thought – August 15, 2017

Fred took his last earthly breath at 9:15am on August 17th. The afternoon before his last words were “I’ve learned to trust in Jesus; I’ve learned to trust in God.” He loved the gospel hymn “Through It All.” His daughter read to him each day. The hymn story that day was “When They Ring Those Golden Bells.” “They will ring for me soon” was his comment. Then later he mouthed the words to Andrae Crouch’s well-loved song.

Trading Hat

An executive generally play three positions simultaneously. Each requires separate skills. First, as a member of the boss’s team. On this team the role is as a peer among others at this same level.

Second, as the quarterback of the team of direct reports. On this one the role of peer is inappropriate. The final decision belongs to the quarterback. The huddle is great and useful for advice, but in 30 seconds the quarterback must have the play called and action underway. Most huddles don’t use a vote.

Thirdly, as a coach to younger and more inexperienced men and women coming up through the organization. This should be a natural process as upward movement occurs. As a coach, the role is secondary to the younger employee’s own quarterback and team. Confusion occurs if the coach tries to take the place of the quarterback.

At Fort Monmouth one of the officers described the unique genius of the American soldier as the ability to move from corporal to sergeant to lieutenant quickly on the field of battle without formal training or ceremony. The speaker pointed out that this distinguished them from other fighting forces which lacked this flexibility.

A good team member with less talent will make a greater contribution to the corporation team effort than a maverick with greater talent. The “individualist” causes problems which interrupt the steady progress. When one focuses on personal gain and visibility to the detriment of the team organizational chaos results. Sometimes extraordinary talent must be sacrificed for the good of the well-performing team. Often in sports hot shots make a team suffer when they won’t sublimate their own numbers for the good of the team.

Another challenge to a well-run team is rhythm. When certain members want to rethink decision ad infinitum (and even ad nauseum) hinders progress. It is important to understand the roles and the responsibilities – and how final decisions are made. Understanding when input is accepted and when it is no longer received is part of the successful pattern of team work.

This week think about: 1) How many teams am I on? 2) Which role do I handle most effectively? 3) Who am I coaching currently?

Words of Wisdom: “A good team member with less talent will make a greater contribution to the corporation team effort than a maverick with greater talent.”

Wisdom from the Word: “May the Lord your God be praised because he favored you by placing you on the throne of Israel! Because of the Lord’s eternal love for Israel, he made you king so you could make just and right decisions.” (1Kings 10:9 NET Bible)

What Makes You Super

Brenda’s Blog – August 15, 2017

“Superheroes have bumps…”

With a smile and great hope my son Jeff asked his five year old daughter, “Do I look like a super hero?” All Dads are bigger than life in the eyes of their little girls, so he expected a “Yes, Daddy!”

Instead, she just looked at him with an expression of surprise, “Oh, Daddy – you don’t look like a superhero – they have bumps on their arms and you don’t!” You could hear the wind rush out of the paternal balloon.

It made me think… how do I identify the super heroes? Do I look for the bumps on their arms? Do I look at the costumes they wear or the powers they seem to possess? Do I spend time looking at the external?

Scripture tells us we look on the outside, but God looks on the heart. How do we judge others? How much time do we spend examining someone’s heart? The world puts emphasis on “stuff,” but that isn’t a fail-safe measure. Dad used to tell people when they casually asked “how much is he worth?” they were actually asking about accumulation, not value. Our worth is established by our heavenly Father, not our stock broker. Bigger bumps don’t mean greater character.

My granddaughter has a genuine super hero for a Dad. He is a man of integrity, strength, faith, and love. His bumps will be seen through his legacy as a husband, father, and pastor. Let’s strive for bumps that are eternal.

Plan Your Progress

Weekly Thought – August 8, 2017

Fred’s thinking aided men and women for decades. He didn’t “shoot from the hip,” even though his style seemed extemporaneous. He invested hours considering questions from others who asked for his help. This week we excerpt some of his ideas on getting ahead in business.

Please continue praying for BWFLI as we develop the BWFLI Mentoring Roundtable which will roll out in 2018. We are organizing his mentoring questions, articles, and Fred Saids on the subject for use in focused campus events.

Plan Your Progress

File your flight plan carefully. It isn’t enough to have a personal plan for progress. It is also important to know how and with whom to file. Don’t assume the boss knows what you want for the future. Tell him or her carefully. They may think (and probably do) you want to do anything the company wants you to do. If you have a preference, then it is best to let it be known enough in advance not to work an inconvenience on the corporation at the time a change comes up. Be clear on what promotions, what segment of the business, or even location you prefer. Be willing to be inconvenienced for the business. But also recognize there is always a strong possibility your goals and that of the company can be coordinated. Don’t assume everyone knows.

Be sure your personal plan is written out. Often I’ve asked people what they want and their answer is, “Something better.” They wanted me to define it for them because they had not taken the time and effort to do it for themselves. Personally, I don’t believe I have ever had a boss who was more interested in my progress than I was. And certainly they didn’t have a greater responsibility for it than I did. Therefore, I needed to work the plan out in writing and as specifically as possible.

Senior executives have a clearer view of the overall strategy and the road ahead. There is a more satisfactory fit if they know what you want. Most will be impressed if they see you have thought it out. However, you don’t want to express these plans in a way which appears self-serving, or threatening.

And a warning: don’t give out more of the plan than is reasonable for the foreseeable future. If you want to be President, it is usually better to get to Vice President first! Too much advance talking can bring envy, opposition, and frustration. Keep a great deal of flexibility in any plan. Give out only those parts to those who can help at the appropriate time.

Be sure your plan is of mutual benefit to your employer. A selfish plan is dangerous. If it is totally selfish, then keep it to yourself. Selfish plans require manipulation and they don’t usually work out naturally. I found those with singularly focused on self-serving goals often failed to succeed in the long run.

This week think about: 1) Is my personal progress plan in writing? 2) How clear am I at work about my career goals? 3) Who should be included in my planning?

Words of Wisdom: “Be sure your plan is of mutual benefit to your employer.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Do not withhold good from those who need it, when you have the ability to help.” (Proverbs 3:27 NET Bible)

Death’s Lessons

Weekly Thought – August 1, 2017

Fred’s use of “I am convinced” evoked confidence. His children were sure whatever followed those words were bedrock truth. He often took subjects and outlined his beliefs. In preparation for the memorial service honoring the life of a friend’s son, he laid out what death taught. At the end of the list he made a final comment to his secretary Margie Keith before she typed the material: “I believe” should be changed to “I know.” Fred was convinced.

Be looking for details on the BWFLI Mentoring Roundtable. This new initiative will help our Christian schools develop “what’s next” strategies.

Death’s Lessons

Death congeals my beliefs:

1) I believe in eternity. We don’t simply cease to exist; we go somewhere. My father, mother, and sister are somewhere called eternity. And where they are, they are free from death. The last enemy has been conquered.

2) I believe in justification through faith in Christ. I know of no one who has lived so purely in this time frame to merit eternal life. It is a gift.

3) I believe death is our enemy. It can hurt us, but not devastate us.

4) I believe in the Comforter. I have experienced the comfort and peace that passes understanding. Furthermore, I have the testimony of truthful friends who have this same experience. I feel order even in this chaos.

5) I believe in the healing power of tears. Tears wash clean like a spiritual detergent.

6) I believe good can come from hurt – even a hurt this deep. Death can be turned to life through the power of God.

7) I know this long, dark night will eventually end. I know it both by faith in His promise and through past experience.

8) I believe the dead in Christ will be reunited. I believe in the hope of joining together in heaven otherwise we would grieve “as those without hope.”

9) I believe this life is the practice and the true game comes in eternity – some leave the practice field early.

10) I believe those who die “now know as they are known.” To me, that is the most exciting part about death. Just to know what has only been seen through a glass dimly is the hope of earth and joy of heaven.

This week think about: 1) What do I believe about death? 2) How clear am I on the Christian’s afterlife? 3) Who needs me to encourage them with the hope of heaven?

Words of Wisdom: “I believe should be changed to I know.”

Wisdom from the Word: “For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor heavenly rulers, nor things that are present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in creation will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8: 38,39 NET Bible)

Answering The Call

Brenda’s Blog – August 1, 2017

“Come before winter” – Apostle Paul

Rick Southerland, BWF’s media director, emailed me: “The August 1st blog post will be your 100th – make it something good.” No pressure, right? So, I thought about nifty spins on 100 – without success. Then I did what I tell others to do – write about what God is teaching you.

For months I planned (and re-planned) a trip to West Virginia to see a dying friend. Details kept changing and I kept working for the ideal schedule. I wrote her saying I wanted to be there with her. I kept hearing Paul’s words from prison to Timothy repeating, “Make every effort to come before winter.” Paul knew if Timothy and Mark didn’t arrive in the next few months he would not see them on this earth. He certainly didn’t doubt the eternal reunion, but he longed for their physical presence.

My friend died a few days ago. She was surrounded by her family and many friends who loved her. She was not sitting in a cold dungeon, aching for the comfort of friends. But I didn’t get there before her winter. Yes, I will see her again in heaven – but I missed the opportunity to hug her, tell her I loved her, and thank her for all her life meant to me.

Why do I choose this for such a milestone? Simply because it points out the fragility of life and the moments which pass quickly. Life gallops these days – no slow sauntering along. We are caught up in the rush of daily-ness. Perhaps it is good to stop regularly, catching up with those we love and taking a reading on the status of our relationships.

Appreciation doesn’t have to be formal. A casual visit, a short card, a quick phone call – all give us an opportunity to be grateful. Notice the commonality in that list? They are all old school forms of communication. At some deeper level, our social media culture doesn’t satisfy the longing Paul expressed for human interaction.

Winters don’t have to be death. They can be emotional losses, physical struggles, business setbacks, or spiritual crises. Our friends send out “come before winter” signals. It is our joy and privilege to respond with the love of Jesus.

What is God teaching you right now? What is He writing on your heart? Who needs to hear it? And blessings on you as you answer the “come before winter” calls in your life.

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