Weekly Thought – February 3, 2026

Fred often counseled distressed couples: “Even when you can’t feel like you are in love, you can treat each other with civility.” He was a fan of Scott Peck’s writings. One of his favorites was A World Waiting To Be Born: Civility Rediscovered. Fred grew up without material sophistication, but was rich in graciousness.

Incivility to Civility

Scott Peck says, “Our illness is incivility, the morally destructive patterns of self-absorption, callousness, manipulativeness, and materialism.” For some time I have studied the emotions of incivility. Here are four that are eroding our civilization:

1) Anger – You can randomly ask any American, “What are you mad about?” and get a quick response. There’s a depth of ire in our society. Unfortunately, I think a great deal of it is being fostered by the demagogues of special interest. Sadly, much of it is the result of spiritual malnutrition. Anger is eating us up, from the inside out. It is the “sweet wine of poison.”
2) Aggression – I don’t mean competition. I like to use the definition from Dr. Will Menninger: “The willingness or even the desire to hurt someone.” I hear aggression dismissed as a response to stress. No, stress results from aggression. We see it on the road everyday. We even see it in the grocery. Mary Alice and I were in the grocery last week and I watched sweet, elderly ladies turn into Rambo creatures driving carts like military tanks.
3) Discourtesy – We are generally courteous to our friends. We treat strangers and too often, our family, with discourtesy. How does this square with the scripture’s admonition to offer hospitality to strangers? Discourtesy in our families doesn’t make sense, but it is very prevalent. I don’t buy that adage, “You hurt the ones you love.” Baloney!

When George Washington was fourteen he made a list of 110 items which denoted a civil life. Here are “Fred’s Four” which, when used regularly, take us a long way. These four help the gears mesh without the scraping sounds of incivility.

1. “Please” – Have you noticed when you use this simple word your phrase changes from command to request?
2. “Excuse me” – We are quick to transfer fault to someone else. When we genuinely accept responsibility, we lubricate our social interactions.
3. “Thank you” – Have you ever heard someone truly and authentically express appreciation? It gives me a warm feeling and makes me want to pass it on. It’s a verbal bridge between individuals.
4. “After you” – Billy Graham and I spent a few days together. I mentioned how he deferred to me at each doorway. He was surprised and when we talked about graciousness, he attributed this trait to his father. Heartfelt deference is a powerful habit.

This week think about: 1) What am I mad about right now? 2) Is the “after you” attitude part of my mindset? 3) What can I do to promote civility in my family this week?

Words of Wisdom: “Heartfelt deference is a powerful habit.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Do not be angry and frustrated! Do not fret! That only leads to trouble!” (Psalm 37:8 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – January 20, 2026

Fred’s reputation for strategic thinking on spiritual matters began early in his life. This week’s thought is an excerpt from an article in Decision magazine (Billy Graham Evangelistic Association), June 1963. The bio identified him as a “Baptist layman, a native of Tennessee, and a nationally known business speaker.” At the time he was 48 with 44 years of influence to go.

Good or Bad?

In all of life there is always one key question. Airplane engineers need to answer: lighter or heavier than air? Donut shops need to answer: on-the-way-to-work or on-the-way-home side of the street? We as individuals have to answer: “What is the tendency of man: good or bad?”

Do people tend to be good with a high potential for bad or do they tend to be bad with a high potential for good? Until we get the answer to this fundamental question, we can never understand ourselves or the universal need for the Gospel.

As an executive, I never have to teach supervisors to fight with their employees. Never have I had to run a course on “goofing off.” As a parent, I never find the need to teach my children the word “no!” or discourage them from sharing too much. Left alone, an organization always tends to deteriorate. Because of this, we are constantly building up, encouraging, and challenging others toward constructive ends.

Experience teaches me people tend to be bad, even though they have a tremendous potential for good. I feel safe in trusting my experience because it squares with the Bible. Knowing this, what is our responsibility? It is seeking to bring others to Christ. This is Billy’s message night after night.

Conversion is basic to man’s ultimate progress. It turns him around and focuses his radar on the Lord. Conversion changes the human pull of gravity from Satan to God. This is what happened to Saul of Tarsus: he had the same drive and intensity as before, but now his motivation is God-ward. The motive changed. After conversion comes the need for challenge. Scripture doesn’t talk about saved sitters. The Apostle Paul said his life was about “apprehended that for which I was apprehended.” The deterioration of natural man is overcome by the invigoration of new life.

This week think about: 1) What am I seeking to apprehend? 2) How do I view the nature of man? 3) Who do I know who needs to think about this?

Words of Wisdom: “I feel safe in trusting my experience because it squares with the Bible.”

Wisdom from the Word: “He is the one who saved us and called us with a holy calling, not based on our works but on his own purpose and grace, granted to us in Christ Jesus before time began.” (2 Timothy 1:9 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – January 13, 2026

Fred attempted to capture everything he thought or found of interest in his reading and hearing. His work pattern for most of his life was sleeping, waking up at 2 a.m., working until 5 a.m. and then either going for donuts on his motorcycle, or in later years, going back to sleep. Consequently, there are thousands and thousands of pieces of paper in BWF files.

Oswald and Me

I find no difficulty in naming my most significant book. It is Oswald Chambers’ My Utmost For His Highest.

I have read it since December 1955 when Grant and Orean Howard gave it to Mary Alice and me which started a chain of our gifting it to others. My mentor and friend, Maxey Jarman, wrote “I’ll always be grateful for the introduction that you gave me to Oswald Chambers.” We plant seeds when we give vital books; we see delightful and fruitful harvests from these gifts.

His thought has become part of my reflexive thought. As the mind of Christ transforms us, so do the minds of our favorite authors. They take up residence in us.

Let me give 5 key thoughts that influence my attitude toward life given by Chambers.

1) Sit loose to things. Enjoy them, work for them, use them, but sit loose to them.
2) Lust says I must have it now. Psychiatrists tell us the most common evidence of American immaturity is the inability to delay gratification. Lust is refusing the natural rhythm of life and failing to mature.
3) Scripture is too often abused. Chambers says, “So often we sharpen a verse of Scripture and jab another with it.” I see those who know chapter and verse use it to intimidate the less instructed.
4) If we do not stand in small things, we will fail in the large. It is so easy to think we would be true and courageous in the weighty matters when we are making exceptions to the Christian code in smaller daily routines.
5) Go through the white funeral. The physical death is the black funeral, but the death self is the white funeral. Out of this comes the complete resurrection of life, unhampered by the problems of human ego and self-righteousness.

My Utmost For His Highest is not just entertaining, nor even exciting – it is compelling.

This week think about: 1) What books influence me? 2) Who has molded my thinking? 3) What book have I shared with others?

Words of Wisdom: “As the mind of Christ transforms us, so do the minds of our favorite authors.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Let the wise also hear and gain instruction, and let the discerning acquire guidance!” (Proverbs 1:5 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – December 23, 2025

Fred enjoyed analogies to express principles. He recognized illustrations everywhere which made their way into his speaking, teaching, and writing. When asked about the timeless, yet timely nature of his communication he replied, “Principles never change – just the illustrations.”

Ample Amps For A Productive Life

We are always warned by the electric company to avoid overloading the circuits. This is good advice, even though I wonder about the value of multiple plugs on Mary Alice’s kitchen outlets. Because she would never fill a plug with five or six appliances simultaneously, there is no danger of maxing the circuitry. We get in overload trouble by using more at one time than common sense would dictate. Maxing out is an exercise in poor decision making.

The same thing happens in our lives. We get overloaded by having too many demanding involvements, emotional experiences, or commitments of time – all at one time. When we do so, we blow a fuse! It isn’t how many connections you have on a circuit, it is how many are used together. The potential for overload is key. Sometimes we can take on multiple activities so long as none of them requires too much “juice” or too many are demanding power simultaneously. When each of the activities competes for our energy, the current is overloaded and we are in danger. It is not the number of tasks, but the net energy required that determines the point of overload.

We draw different amounts of current depending on the emotional or physical output required. For example, I used to speak to very large audiences, and it took practically no energy because the input was matched by the output. If there had been no positive input, such as friendly reactions, laughs, agreement, body language expressing interest, and appropriate applause from the audience it would have taken a great deal more output from me.

You must reach a balance where the amount that you give and the amount you receive are equivalent. In other words, it is a zero sum energy game. We burn out when we are not sharing the energy load in the task, whether intellectual, emotional, physical, or spiritual. A young friend told me an older man once told him it was time for him to stand on his own, not ride piggyback!

This week carefully consider: 1) In what condition is my circuitry (Intellectual, emotional, physical, spiritual)? 2) What tasks drain energy and lead to overload? 3) What part am I playing in carrying the load in my family, workplace, and church?

Words of Wisdom: “It is not the number of tasks, but the net energy required that determines the point of overload.”

Wisdom from the Word: “‘Not by strength, nor by might, but by my Spirit’ says the Lord who rules over all.” (Zechariah 4:6 NET Bible)