Rewards of Perseverance (Part 3)

Weekly Thought – October 14, 2014

Fred focused on understanding his giftedness and challenged others to do so. In mentoring a group of young high achievers he asked over 200 questions over the years of breakfast meetings. They are on the website www.breakfastwithfred.com. One of them is simply, “What is my uniqueness?” Four words which generate hours of contemplation and agitation. Fred made a close connection between giftedness and purpose; one’s being a manifestation of the other.

This week’s email is part three of a series describing the Rewards of Perseverance. The first three are: 1) Character 2) Maturity and 3) Experience. The next two are: 1) Finding purpose and concentration and 2) Self-knowledge.

Rewards of Perseverance (Part 3)

One of the advantages of adversity is the finding of purpose and concentration. Douglas MacArthur on V-J Day said, “It is my earnest hope that from this solemn occasion a better world shall emerge.” Trouble focuses the mind.

Some of us are trying to get away from difficulties. The sailboat needs breezes to move; the human being needs the winds of adversity for motivation. Our valleys test our ability to forget revenge and practice forgiveness. (more…)

Rewards of Perseverance (Part 2)

Weekly Thought – October 7, 2014

Fred believed in organized thought. He listened to those who came to see him and quickly assessed their mental clarity. He often asked people to write down their ideas, proposals, or issues. He repeated to them what his mentor Maxey Jarman said to him, “Fred, writing burns off the fuzziness in our thinking.” On the other hand, Fred resisted writing for publication. He felt it “concretized his thoughts and gave him no room for adjustment or growth.” We at BWF are thankful he bowed to the leadership of those who encouraged him to capture his mental musings on paper.

This week’s email is a continuation of the rewards reaped through perseverance.

Rewards of Perseverance (Part 2)

Perseverance isn’t abstract, nor just a reward in itself. There are tangible beneficial results. Two previously covered are character development and maturity. The next one is extrapolating principles,

1) Extrapolating principles from experiences is extremely helpful. We all have a storage system for information, and for experiences, as well. When we learn to store them as principles and not just random happenings we are creating a knowledge base. Principles never change, but techniques do. (more…)

Rewards of Perseverance

Weekly Thought – September 30, 2014

Fred’s ability to cut through fluff astounded some, and disturbed others. His preference for truth could be unsettling. But oh, how helpful it was. In speaking of tough times he observed, “One mistake Christians often make is assuming going through hard times equals automatic spiritual growth. After the furnace, some walk out as giants; others melt down to midget-size.” The next two emails are excerpted from his thinking on perseverance – and its rewards.

Thank you for praying as we seek to “stretch and bless the next generation of leaders… to the glory of God.” We are asking for discernment, open doors, and eager invitations. The work continues to grow and our eagerness does, too.

Rewards of Perseverance

“So we must not grow weary in doing good, for in due time we will reap, if we do not give up.” (Galatians 6:9)

My Mother lived this verse before five boys and a preacher husband. She modeled perseverance in and out of season. We reaped the rewards of a Mother who endured.

In writing and speaking about perseverance, I repeatedly say, “Perseverance is a process.” It is a process, not just for the exercise, but for the rewards. They are both satisfying and enduring. (more…)

Growing in the Spirit

Weekly Thought – September 23, 2014

Fred firmly believed in the process of sanctification. “He has a purpose for us – to be transformed into the image of His own dear Son, Jesus. He uses the ups and downs of life to conform us.” Throughout Fred’s life he witnessed the working of God – often through most difficult situations. He loved Andrae Crouch’s song, “Through It All.” His last words on this earth were “I’ve learned to trust in Jesus; I’ve learned to trust in God.”

How has Fred stretched you? How have the Weekly Thoughts strengthened you? During this next 12 months we are encouraging you to share these ideas with us. September 1st was the anniversary of Fred’s 99th birthday. We are taking the next 12 months to celebrate all God has done through Fred and BWF.

Growing in the Spirit

Learning to appreciate God’s silence is part of our spiritual growth. The quiet comes in some of the hardest places – the places we want him to shout out to us. We wait and wait, as David the Psalmist said. Then He answers.

God’s delays are not God’s denials.

We are to be patient. True faith does not require sight or sound. In these quiet times, we know it is our faith that pleases Him. Oswald Chambers, my most revered theologian, says “God honors us with silence.” (more…)

Spiritual Growth

Weekly Thought – September 16, 2014

Fred watered. He loved talent and loved nurturing (but not hovering). Harold Myra, the retired CEO of Christianity Today International, enjoyed the benefit of mutual mentoring. He and Fred were truly “iron sharpening iron.”

Rising Above a Toxic Workplace: Taking Care of Yourself in an Unhealthy Environment (Northfield Publishing) is a new collaboration among three experienced and wise men: Gary Chapman, Paul White, and Harold Myra. It boldly presents the problems in business and ministry arenas. It creatively and clearly advances solutions, as well. It is helpful, as Fred would say!

Spiritual Growth

Several years ago, a friend of mine was in deep financial trouble. Bankruptcy was a distinct possibility. He asked his pastor to pray for him. Before the pastor began, he said, “I will pray if you will promise me you won’t be mad at God even if you declare bankruptcy.” My friend agreed, and has repeatedly said he believes this was the first step in his spiritual growth.

Not only should we avoid getting mad at God in adverse times, but we should avoid the “spoiled brat” syndrome, expecting God to break the rules and make exceptions just for us. “Why me? I’ve been a good Christian. I don’t drink, smoke, or chase women.” This high profile executive showed up at all the Christian events, but had a most immature view of himself and God. The definition is in who we are in Christ, not in what we don’t do. Too many Christians want God to put them in a holy bubble, protecting them from life’s problems. A more mature attitude is, “Why not me?”

The Marines expect and want the toughest jobs in the service. The old Catholic mystics viewed spiritual growth as the opportunity for tough assignments.

In troubling times, it is important to develop the right image of God. We tend to draw our own imagery based on what we need Him to look like. A clear understanding of God in the Bible keeps our head straight. While lecturing at a conservative seminary, a student approached me and said, “God has me just where He wants me to be.” “Where is that?” I asked. “Broke,” was his quick reply. Believing his image of God was faulty, and wanting to be helpful, I answered him. “We have a son. If I felt he was saying I had him right where I wanted him, and that was broke, then I’d be very disappointed.”

Don’t blame God for the consequences of your own irresponsibility.

God loves us. We persevere because we know His presence and rest in the relationship. Ray Stedman, the venerable teacher and pastor of Peninsula Bible Church, told me his life turned around when he found out that “God is for me.”

This week think carefully about: 1) How clear am I on my relationship with God? 2) When did I realize God is for me? 3) What tough assignments have I undertaken?

Words of Wisdom: “Don’t blame God for the consequences of your own irresponsibility.”

Wisdom from the Word: “You are my source of strength! I will sing praises to you! For God is my refuge, the God who loves me.” (Psalms 59:17 NET Bible)

Keep It Alive

Weekly Thought – September 9, 2014

Fred believed a healthy person cultivated friendships with younger people, so aging didn’t rob of all relationships. He also understood the natural life cycle required an active involvement in managing the process. An article for Leadership Journal carried the title, “Old but not Older.” That was Fred!

Keep It Alive

Aging is a prime example of redefining achievement – the phrase I use to describe the process of refocusing energies to avoid falling into the pit during pits or plateaus.

Erik Erikson, the prominent 20th century psychologist and psychoanalyst, created the phrase “identity crisis.” His work centered on the wholeness of the human being. His remarks about aging have been most helpful to me. He counseled others to move the deterioration to the periphery as they aged.

In other words, the core of who we are never changes. The things we can no longer do are moved to the outside of our life and don’t define us. Let me give you a personal example. My physical condition changed my schedule, severely reducing my travel. This transition could have caused great stress. I could have moaned and groaned, but I took Erikson’s advice. I looked at my gifts and created other venues for making a contribution like teleconferences, personal visits by others to my home, a website, and local speeches.

I like to say “service is the rent I pay for occupying space on earth.” As I age, these alternative ways to experience achievement and productivity help me keep my rent paid up.

The loss of mobility, agility, ability, and responsibility are tough. No one wants to surrender their independence. I made a choice and adopted the attitude “Delightfully dependent.” I moved the deterioration to the perimeter. (more…)

Redefine Achievement

Weekly Thought -September 2, 2014

Fred considered his ability to think one of his gifts. His abundant notes scribbled on everything from matchbooks to church offering envelopes supported this belief. Recently a spiral notebook was uncovered containing outlines for Sunday School lessons at Park Cities Baptist Church in Dallas, a school board, and other speaking venues. One section outlined four months of thoughts. For each day a one line subject is assigned. His goal was to devote thinking time each time to an independent concept. The breadth of these musings is amazing. For example, Jazz versus classical music, family values, or marks of mentoring. There is no text – just the notation.

Thank you for praying as we strive to share the fruit of his thinking with others. We appreciate your prayers, your emails, and your financial support.

Redefine Achievement

A noted organizational development expert recommends to his clients they segment their lives into business units. He tells them to see themselves as CEO with each area a corporate division. In this model, they have direct reports for the physical, financial, spiritual, relational, career, and intellectual division of their company. Quarterly reports are required. It is great if all divisions are profitable, but when they aren’t, strategic plans are developed to ensure a healthy bottom line. For example, when a report is submitted showing a 10 pound “overage,” the physical division is running in the red. A plan for weight loss is immediately put in place. The other divisions with positive results get the “attaboys.”

When the career division is deficient, we often think the game is over. But another way to look at this is to look for accomplishment in the other areas. I call this reattaching our egos. During rough, dark times our egos take a beating. It is critical to control our egos during these seasons. (more…)

Overcoming Loss

Weekly Thought – August 26, 2014

Fred constantly looked for ways to make forward progress. The identification of problems and growth areas began the process. Defining solutions had to follow to avoid falling into negative patterns. When he spoke about the loss of confidence and relationships as the basis for pain, he immediately followed up with suggestions for recovery.

The Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute has taken teams to 10 Christian institutions. Nearly 70 men and women have contributed to these leadership blitzes focused on “stretching and blessing the next generation of leaders… to the glory of God.”

Overcoming Loss

How can you persevere through professional and personal loss? Here are three ideas which have worked for me. See if they strike a chord with you.

1) Build new support systems

Unless we can recognize the difference between business associates and genuine friends we will be disappointed and hardened when things change. One man going through a serious financial downturn wisely listed his friends who would not be affected by his money failures. He and his wife concentrated on spending their time with those on their “authentic” list. We should be mature enough to avoid disillusionment when social relationships grow cold as mutual benefits decrease.

2) Stay in the loop

Keep up contacts and activities even when enduring difficult times. You might have to alter your social habits because you don’t have the discretionary income for golf, the expense account for pricey lunches, or exotic vacations, but you can creatively stay in touch. I find writing letters, sending clippings, making phone calls, and looking for local opportunities keep my mind active and the energy up. My physical incapacity eliminates many of the ways I connected with business and personal contacts. Finding alternative methods is essential and actually mentally challenging. The temptation to draw back during setbacks is damaging. My Mother used to say, “This, too, shall pass.” Cutting off relationships during low periods endangers the eventual comeback. (more…)

Positively Painful

Weekly Thought – August 19, 2014

Fred wrapped up his earthly assignment on August 17, 2007 at 9:15am. His life was devoted to faithfully stewarding his gifts for the benefit of others. His thinking on perseverance enabled many to navigate choppy waters. This week’s email is an excerpt from a Sunday School lesson for Highland Park Presbyterian Church. He talked about the pain of progress.

On September 12 and 13, 2015 we will celebrate the 100th anniversary of Fred’s birth. We will be sharing his impact on others. If you wish to participate, please email us answering the question: “How did Fred stretch you?”

Thank you for supporting us in prayer, encouragement, and financial assistance.

Positively Painful

Plan for pain – it will come. Don’t be shocked; don’t be thrown off course. James tells us, “Don’t be surprised when various trials come.” A well-conceived plan makes us ready for action.

In my experience, one of the primary causes of pain is loss. Here are two of the most prominent:

1) Confidence – An officer of a failed corporation sat at breakfast and told me he was a phony. “I didn’t have the capability everyone credited to me.” I stopped him saying, “I wouldn’t sit and listen to anyone else lie about you, so I won’t let you do it, either.” That is exactly what he was doing. He lost his confidence, but not his ability. I have a sign in my office to remind me: “You haven’t failed – only your plans have.”

Having an objective view of the experience allows us to accurately assess our situation. In doing this, we operate from the current reality, allowing us to make solid judgments. A totally subjective approach results in withdrawal or the cockiness of false confidence. (more…)

Plan for Pain

Weekly Thought – August 12, 2014

Fred once read that root canals without anesthetic were a form of WWII torture. When his dentist told him one was in his future, he decided to see if he could have endured the pain. SO, he did it without anesthetic! He made it, giving the dentist one of those “let me tell you about my crazy patient” stories. Fred recalled the experience, telling others it only took his nervous system six months to recover.

Plan for Pain

Bob Richards, former Olympic gold medalist, and I lectured together. I listened in as he interviewed other Olympians. “What do you do when you hurt?” Each one of them had a specific routine for the painful times. I was curious and asked him later, “Why did you ask that?” Quickly, he replied, “No one wins the gold without hurting.” They expected it and planned for it. It was part of the perseverance plan on the road to the victory stand.

Marathoners anticipate “hitting the wall.” A business associate began running 26+ mile races in his 50th year. His first one was at White Rock Lake in Dallas. The runners call it “Running the Rock,” and know exactly where they will experience the great depletion of mental and physical energy. As he ran it year after year, he knew the mile marker and trained to break through it.

Our daughter, Brenda, entertained her young grandson, Andrew at a play area. She watched him try over and over to climb atop the tree-like molded plastic form. He slipped, fell, bruised his knees, but kept going after it. She decided he had tried enough, and suggested they play somewhere else. He looked her square in the eye as he hung a few feet from the top. “Gram, do you know what a champion is? Until I get to the top I won’t be a champion.” He knew the pain of perseverance and the cost of championship.

My friend Robert Schuller often said on national TV, “no pain, no gain.” That’s true, but without genuine perseverance there can be pain with no gain. I am interested in your gain, and I want you to plan for pain as you develop. (more…)

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