Direction not Goals

Weekly Thought – November 5, 2013

Fred sat on a tombstone when he was in his twenties thinking about the direction he wanted for his life. To codify his thinking he wrote out an epitaph: “He stretched others.” He said, “I enjoyed seeing people productive and growing.” His tombstone in Dallas, Texas bears those three words for indeed, he did!

“Thank you for last week’s email. I really needed to hear that and I am sure many others did, too.” The Weekly Thoughts are sent as an encouragement and as a way to allow Fred’s work to keep on stretching others. As you know we are currently having a critical fundraising drive and your help in large and small contributions is needed.

Direction not Goals

Choosing a life direction is more important than just focusing on goals. Enticing short term goals can take one off course and in a faulty direction. Mature success and satisfaction come in the direction we move, not in the goals we attain.

I oppose setting an ultimate goal for one’s life, in the sense of a specific, definable, measurable, figure-oriented place in life — the place for arrival. This puts too much importance on one decision. This closes off the serendipity of life which leads to magnificent adventures.

I have known too many executives who set a title as their ultimate goal only to realize that the joy was in the challenge of achievement, not the actual job attained. The old song says it well, “Is this all there is?” I laugh at the picture of the man spent a lifetime climbing a ladder only to realize at the top it was leaning against the wrong wall. (more…)

Clarify Your Thinking

Weekly Thought – October 29, 2013

Fred’s understanding of human nature resulted from lifelong study and observation. He found patterns in thinking and behavior. He talked of the modus operandi – the method of operation. He strongly believed in finding the basis from which our life’s philosophy derives.

The tenth year of Breakfast With Fred is nearing its completion. In these years a website, a book, hundreds of weekly thoughts, and eight Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institutes have touched thousands worldwide. Beginning during Fred’s lifetime, the work goes on striving to expand, deepen, and preserve. Thank you for supporting us. We are reader-supported and we are currently having a critical fundraising drive. Your help is needed.

Clarify Your Thinking

Behind every plan of action, every commitment of time, and energy should be a solid philosophical base. From it comes our answer to “why?” Why should I be a leader? Why should I pay the price of success? Why not stay where it is comfortable? Why push ahead risking failure?

Is it just for ego? Or do I feel I have been given a talent, an opportunity, and I don’t want to miss to excitement of worthwhile accomplishment? Do I see this accomplishment can be made in any period of my life? (more…)

Who You Are Meant to Be

Weekly Thought-October 22, 2013

Fred was blessed with a network of friends who strengthened him and lived out the “iron sharpening iron.” He gathered a cadre of truth-tellers who walked in integrity. He knew who he wanted to be and chose an inner circle of those who, like him, understand their gifts and their missions.

As October nears a close, we thank you for your support. These Weekly Thoughts are a unique way of continuing Fred’s legacy. Please continue to share ways they are meaningful and helpful. Breakfast With Fred is reader-supported and we are asking you to support us with donations large or small at this important time. If you receive encouragement from these emails, we need the encouragement from you in the form of your support.

Who You Are Meant to Be

We are in a time when ne’er-do-wells (particularly young ones) persist in saying, “Love me for myself!” When I hear that I think of the sign in the store, “Sold as is.” That always denotes damage to the product or something that reduces value. I want to see people striving to fulfill their gifts, not sitting idly by accepting “as is.” (more…)

You and Your Network

Weekly Thought – October 15, 2013

Fred enjoyed connecting friends with others. Way before networking was a commonly accepted business practice, Fred understood its value. And it was always for mutual benefit, never for manipulation or selfish ends.

As you are reading this, the Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute team of 21 will be “stretching and blessing the next generation of leaders…for the glory of God” at East Texas Baptist University. Thank you for praying for God’s work. Breakfast With Fred is reader-supported and we are asking you to support us with donations large or small at this important time.

You and Your Network

Networking is the way most things happen. Great achievers have always understood the necessity of organized assistance.

Successful businesses depend on a network built of suppliers, customers, government agencies, stockholders, employees, and management.

The human body is probably the oldest network — the many parts are connected. The foot depends on the eyes to keep from stumbling… and the eye depends on the eyebrow to keep sweat from running down. (more…)

Joyful Health

Weekly Thought – October 8, 2013

Fred believed in his body’s ability to heal itself, sometimes to the “I can only speak personally”, but I have found when I have the right attitude my body has great recuperative power. When our children complain of a humdrum life I tell them; “There’s nothing wrong with you that a little excitement won’t cure!” Fred was severely immobilized in his last four or five years. He was quoted in a national magazine: “I am not disabled; I am delightfully dependent.” He had a joyful attitude.

Please continue to pray for the BWFLI team that is heading to East Texas Baptist University on October 22nd. Thank you for ongoing encouragement and support.

Joyful Health

Joy can live in a sick or disabled body…the spirit can overcome the physical limitations. Joy can also reside in a body that is well-respected, protected from abuse.

Very few people miss a vacation due to illness. Most of the school children who are sick to their stomachs are often “sick of school,” or afraid to face a pressured situation. I have no scientific survey to prove this, but I would daresay a class led by an exciting and loving teacher experiences less absenteeism. (more…)

Joy Through Financial Integrity

Weekly Thought – October 1, 2013

Fred’s financial wisdom and practice were well known. One of his life-long friends commented recently on his sage counsel to a group of Dallas businessmen: “Keep a year’s living expenses in savings and if possible live on half your income.” “We were all shocked when he said that because most of the people we knew lived right up to the hilt supporting a high profile life style. No one thought about reducing their standard of living to the one Fred and Mary Alice chose.”

“Money can be a tool or an idol” is one of Fred’s pithy sayings. To those who give in the support of BWF, BWFLI, and the Weekly Thought, we want you to know it is most certainly a tool for the furtherance of this ministry. Thank you.

Joy Through Financial Integrity

Those inundated by financial worries seldom exude a joyful attitude. Our value system is exemplified by our relationship to money. I laughingly told someone, “You never know a person until you count money with them.” It brought a smile, but I was dead serious. Scott Peck wrote about the underlying flaw in the American character – the failure to delay gratification. We see this throughout our culture, but none so clearly as in our use of money. Buying on time and using credit were unfortunate additions to our financial system.

We are so anxious for the fruit we pick it before it is ripe. Oswald Chambers defined lust as “I must have it now” and how true that is of our instant satisfaction society. (more…)

Giving Yourself

Weekly Thought – September 24, 2013

Fred said “Be A Blessing” would be the family motto if there were one. He believed self-focus was a dead end. His counsel to others was always, “get excited about something bigger than yourself.”

Gratitude for faithful friends who support Fred’s ongoing ministry and the development of expanded outreach is deeply felt by the board of BWF Project. Your encouraging words energize us. Your financial support allows us to continue. Thank you for standing with us.

Giving Yourself

The essence of joy is the willingness to give oneself into forgetfulness. Trying to “forget yourself” is nearly impossible, but developing the disciplined habit of giving ourselves to a cause or person allows us the privilege of determined forgetfulness. John Wannamaker said, “The most important lesson I have learned is that I have the least trouble with myself when I’m giving myself to a worthwhile cause.”

One evening I was sitting in the lobby of the old Gibson Hotel in Cincinnati. Two writers were sitting within earshot and I thoroughly enjoyed their conversation. The younger asked, “If you had your life to live over, what would you do with yourself?” Without hesitation, the other replied, “I’d find something big enough to give myself to.” (more…)

Joy for the Journey

Weekly Thought – September 17, 2013

Fred published You and Your Network in 1984 at age 69. He refused many earlier offers to capture his thoughts. His friend Jarrell McCracken, then President/Founder of Word Publishing, corralled him and this great little book came to life. Nearly 30 years later people refer to it and benefit from its wisdom.

How grateful everyone at BWF and BWFLI is for your prayerful encouragement and support. Your emails, your calls, your financial contributions all contribute to the joy in the journey we experience.

Joy for the Journey

When I speak of “joy for the journey” I am not talking about surface happiness which comes and goes like the wind. I like to think happiness is a bubbling brook and joy is a deep aquifer. It is the profound sense of adequacy grounded in the sufficiency of Christ. Joy is more than fortuitous circumstances. Joy is necessary when life is out of joint. (more…)

Productive, Not Happy

Weekly Thought – September 10, 2013

Fred’s children learned early to avoid requests in “happy language.” Making an argument for money to spend on something because it made one happy was sure to lose. On the other hand, pleas for memory makers or growth experiences received a much more favorable argument. “Helpful” “productive” “effective” were strong Fred words which exemplified his lifelong desire to stretch others.

Palm Beach Atlantic University and Taylor University are both working with the Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute to provide venues which will indeed “stretch and bless the next generation of leaders…to the glory of God.” We are thankful for their friendship. Please pray for God’s blessing.

Productive, Not Happy

I once wrote myself a note criticizing my compulsion to be productive. “Fred, at this age, why can’t you just be happy with who you are and forget about all that productivity stuff?” As I composed an eloquent treatise on the benefits of happiness over productivity I realized it is impossible for me (and probably any other leaders) to sacrifice productivity at the altar of happiness. It just isn’t built into our DNA. In a strange way, productivity results in happiness, but singularly focusing on happiness does not result in productivity.

The more I wrote, the clearer it became that aiming at personal happiness alone is basically selfish. I am not condemning happiness as evil, but it has a strong self-centered element to it. On the other hand, the desire to be productive is other centered. It is grounded in the desire to do something of value that contributes to the general well-being.

To me, much of the reward of leadership is the sense of productivity. Producing something through others and for others that otherwise would have not occurred without the leader’s actions is gratification of the highest order.

By the time I finished writing my summary read: “Leaders would rather be productive than happy.”

Productivity is not the same as activity. Ironically, leaders are sometimes more productive when they are not doing. Sometimes their most significant contribution is instilling vision, thinking about direction, and engendering enthusiasm. These things are often done in casual settings, not formal meetings. The influence of leadership is not limited to organizational pronouncements.

The opportunity to build into the life of an organization or an individual is one of my great joys. As a consultant to major corporations, I strategize at high levels. But I also am able to sit down one on one to do productive thinking with those who need a sounding board. Helping people think through decisions, work through problems, or outline a plan of action creates a sense of high productivity and the use of my leadership gifts.

“Fred, why can’t you just be happy and forget about productivity?” Because God gave me a gift to steward and work to do which makes me productive…that’s why.

This week think about: 1) How productive am I right now? 2) What brings me joy? 3) Who models happiness through productivity for me?

Words of Wisdom: “Leaders would rather be productive than happy.”

Wisdom from the Word: “just as I was in my most productive time, when God’s intimate friendship was experienced in my tent,” (Job 29:4 NET Bible)

Leading and Learning

Weekly Thought – September 3, 2013

Fred thoroughly enjoyed Charlie “Tremendous” Jones. One of Charlie’s famous statements was: “Except for the books you read and the people you meet, you will be the same person in five years that you are today.” Fred believed association was key to the healthy development, as was reading. He believed in personal growth through the iron sharpening iron method.

As you pray for the BWFLI event at East Texas Baptist University, would you ask the Lord to direct the preparation both on campus through the leadership of Dr. Emily Prevost and the team members who will be arriving October 22^nd? They go to initiate conversations and create connections.

Leading and Learning

One of the high points for me was being part of a gathering that included Ray Stedman and fifteen of the country’s top preachers. The topic of discussion was the future and encouragement of effective expository preaching. Heady stuff for this layman!

During one lunch, I was moved most deeply moved. Stephen Olford said, “My brothers, I am weary of celebrity religion. I have had my share of recognition, but if when I die my family doesn’t say, ‘There was something of the Spirit of the Lord in that man,’ I have failed.” Spontaneously, a solid round of amens circled the lunch table. Finishing well came into clearer focus at that moment.

These leaders had developed the process that turns knowledge into wisdom. Again, I saw the truth that great leaders do not seek to impress others. Their commitment to the Lord and their leadership position melds into maturity. Interestingly, leadership requires maturity, but it also produces it. As we know, maturity is one of the rewards of leadership.

For those who have the talent to lead, leadership provides great fulfillment. I can think of few things more frustrating to one with leadership gifts than the denial of the opportunity to lead. This doesn’t mean needing to be in charge or take control. It means the opportunity to use their gifts and talents. Can you imagine the pitiful situation if a Rubenstein had never touched the keys of a Steinway?

Running the race and finishing well includes leading for those so talented. Being all God created them to be requires taking hold of these responsibilities. When Paul told the Ephesians each of us was designed for particular work and moreover, God had already created those opportunities for the use of that design, he included leadership. Leadership is God’s workmanship.

I am convinced the much desired “well done” is the response prompted by the full and satisfactory use of the God-given gifts. It has no measure in worldly goods, social status, or popular acclaim. It is simply the good and productive use of those gifts so long ago bestowed. When people ask me my definition of success I tell them: “the ratio of gifts given to the gifts used.”

This week think carefully about: 1) What is my success ratio? 2) Who am I leading? 3) What is my unique gift?

Words of Wisdom: “Leadership is God’s workmanship.”

Wisdom from the Word: “I know, my God, that you examine thoughts and are pleased with integrity. With pure motives I contribute all this; and now I look with joy as your people who have gathered here contribute to you.” (1 Chronicles 29:17 NET Bible)

«‹55 56 57