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  • Weekly Thoughts (Page 52)

Sincerity of Communication

Weekly Thought – June 16, 2015

Fred’s reputation as a communicator remains strong. Regularly we hear from those who say, “I heard Fred speak and what he said really stayed with me. He took a complex idea and made it comprehensible.” Fred likened his speaking style to passing a pot. “An idea needs a handle just like a pot does to successfully move it from one to another.” He used one-liners and illustrations to create this transfer tool. The website breakfastwithfred.com has hundreds of these one-liners in its leadership library.

Sincerity of Communication

When we really want to communicate we must accept our responsibility of using language the other understands.

Non-believers, for example, and particularly those with no Christian background hear much of our revered standard phrases as “pious babble.” Even our tone of voice can turn them off. Without thinking we affect the “seminary brogue” so widely that even when surfing the TV we can tell a sermon with just a word or two. In my day the Billy Graham style dominated most American pulpits. Of course, that has changed, but there is still a rhythm and tempo which identifies many preachers. Opening up clear communication requires we take an inventory of our vocabulary.

Using terms like “blessed hope” or “saved” mean so very much to those in the community of faith, especially the evangelical branch. Outside those circles they tend toward “deer in the head lights” expressions on faces. Using lingo is actually a form of laziness. Committing ourselves to effective communication requires discipline, integrity, and hard work.

We must have enough passion to communicate to motivate us to learn the language of the audience and use it meaningfully. Too often we get frustrated when another’s inability to understand us, rather than accepting the responsibility of being understandable. Have you ever seen an American in another culture try to get someone to understand English? Invariably they speak louder and louder, repeating over and over as if repetition and volume will create understanding.

Sincerity of communication must be a hallmark in any communication, but especially with those of Christian faith. And we must be careful not to use our assumed personal connection with God as a persuasion tool. When someone claims God as their personal source of knowledge and action, I am somewhat skeptical. When someone cannot give me sound thinking other than an emotional, “God told me,” I wait for more substance. Too often, the statements that follow prove hollow and even wrong.

One of my cardinal principles for communication is: Speak to express, not impress.

This week think about: 1) How can I achieve better communication at home, work, church? 2) Where am I lazy and fall back on lingo rather than enlarging my vocabulary? 3) What motivates me to express, not impress?

Words of Wisdom: “We speak to express, not impress.”

Wisdom from the Word: “The one who is wise in heart is called discerning, and kind speech increases persuasiveness.” (Proverbs 16:21 NET Bible)

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Service on HIS Schedule

Weekly Thought – June 9, 2015

Fred evaluated constantly. Maturity was his consistent goal. He believed growth came through “association, travel, and reading.” Whenever he was with someone, he tried to learn from them.

His good friend Charlie “Tremendous” Jones was well-known for his assessment: “Except for the people you meet, the places you go, and the books you read, you will be the same person in five years that you are today.” He and Fred certainly tracked well on that idea, didn’t they?

Service on HIS Schedule

Years ago, Dick Halverson, former Chaplain of the Senate, and I conducted a retreat for lay people. He gave me great freedom when he said, “Do you realize Christ did not have a daily planner? He simply when about doing good. When the woman with the lingering sickness stopped Him as He was on the way to raise Lazarus, He stopped and took care of her needs. He didn’t say, ‘Wait a minute, I am on my way to raise the dead and that is more important than your ongoing issue of blood.’ He stopped to touch her.”

Jesus used each opportunity to do good. When we believe God engineers our circumstances, He sets our priorities.

That phrase “Jesus went about doing good” has been a game changer for me. Our Christian service isn’t about setting lofty goals and striving for “maximum Kingdom impact.” Years ago there was a management theory called “Management While Walking Around.” I found the style helpful when I was assessing operations. You can pick up more in the midst rather than ensconced in the corner office. Our spiritual life is the same. We can see God’s hand in our day to day as we “go about.”

As I get older, my perspective on God’s involvement in my circumstances becomes clearer and clearer. I see His engineering in my daily life. When I was young, I was a great planner. I still believe in planning organizational activities. However, I’ve learned to leave great flexibility in my spirituality service. I see instances that seemed insignificant at the time were actually not so unimportant. Conversations that appeared to be casual might have great impact.

I had breakfast with a young professional man and gave him one thought which he wrote down. He later told me “That re-vectored my life.” I certainly wasn’t talking with him with the intent of making that long term impact. But, I was sitting down with him to listen and to respond appropriately.

God wants dedicates, not volunteers. The dedicated person gives us control, saying “I’m available to you. You do what you want with me.” The volunteer signs up for special service. The volunteer makes himself available on his own terms.

Joy in the Christian life comes when we open our hands and start seeing our daily walk as the means of active Christian service. Measuring impact is not our job – faithfulness is.

This week think about: 1) When has God used me in the ordinary? 2) How much do I believe in God’s sovereignty? 3) What will it take for me to give up control of my “spiritual impact?”

Words of Wisdom: “When we believe God engineers our circumstances, He sets our priorities.”

Wisdom from the Word: “I will walk among you, and I will be your God and you will be my people.” (Leviticus 26:12 NET Bible)

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Success, A Slippery Slope

Weekly Thought – June 2, 2015

Fred defined success as the ratio between gifts given and gifts used. He saw the personal nature of this measurement. He refused to use wealth, position, or status as gauges for attaining success.

Thank you again for your ongoing support. When you email, call, or visit our Facebook group and page, we are uplifted and strengthened. The Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute page on Facebook contains pictures, blog entries, and information about the activities.

Success, A Slippery Slope

Our society is permeated with the success syndrome. Recently, I heard a young motivational speaker proclaim, “Fake it ‘til you make it!” He meant to establish an image of success and then work the daylights out to get there. Somehow this seems like pedaling fast to catch up with yourself.

If we let others define our success, it is truly a slippery slope. If we follow Christ’s example, then we simply go about doing good. Once a young preacher said to me, “I can be happy just being a man of God, but that isn’t enough for my family… it isn’t enough for my board… they want me to be successful and make the church successful.” Heartbreaking, wrong-headed thinking.

I suggest to any Christian who wants to be successful he explore scripture and find a model of someone who focused totally on being successful. I can name five or six who operated with this motivation – and they all failed or were cursed. Remember the man who offered the apostles money for their spiritual gift. Maybe he intended to help people, but he wanted the credit instead of giving it to God. The apostles wisely said, in effect, “Go to Hell!”

Mother Theresa said she would not accept any honors because it took time away from her work. She did not say it was wrong for her work to be recognized, but only that it was a distraction for her. Caring for the dying was more important than receiving the Nobel Prize. She knew inner success.

Breaking Psychological Barriers

Roger Bannister did more than run the first four-minute mile in history. He broke a psychological barrier. Almost immediately others started doing what hadn’t been done before. They, too, broke the four minute barrier. Training didn’t do it. The time span between Bannister and the others was noticeably short.

Leaders need to recognize and break psychological barriers for their people.

One of the greatest I have seen is the power of the church to show people who believed they couldn’t find peace see what life can be when caught in the web of His grace. Christ broke the ultimate barrier: He rescued us from death and gave us entry into life eternal.

This week think about: 1) What is my greatest success recently? 2) How have I devised my own definition of success? 3) Who models psychological barrier breaking for me?

Words of Wisdom: “Leaders need to recognize and break psychological barriers for their people.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Get dressed for service and keep your lamps burning;” (Luke 12:35 NET Bible)

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Used or Using?

Weekly Thought – May 26, 2015

Fred regularly prayed to be “useful, helpful, and productive.” He strongly believed in the recognition of gifts and the purposeful employment of them. Two of the friends Fred mentions (Torrey Johnson and Ron Glosser) are in heaven with him. They each taught him much about the Lord’s service.

Our 2016 schedule for the Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute is nearly complete. Three of the four schools have definite dates. We sincerely covet your prayer support. Thank you.

Used or Using?

I met Torrey Johnson when he first started Youth for Christ. At that time, I was asking certain people I highly admired for their autographed picture. I kept them in front of me, not as a sign of my relationship with them, but as a reminder of their character qualities. Torrey sent one back with the inscription, “To Fred, God’s man in God’s place.” I never felt I could hang it on the wall. I kept it in my desk drawer.

I was always condemned by how seldom I actually felt I was God’s man in God’s place. During the times I sensed He was using me, I felt very small yet very secure. When I was playing for my own team, I felt insecure and uncertain because I was depending on my own strength.

Recently I was talking with my dear friend Ron Glosser, former CEO of the Hershey Trust. He is a truly delightful person. I asked him the usual question, “How’s it going, Ron?” He answered in the best possible way that simple question could be answered when he said, “Fred, I feel God is using me.”

What a wonderful feeling to realize God is using us rather than our using God. So long as we keep that spiritual dimension in our leadership, people will see God in us.

Two great epitaphs come to mind. Steve Brown, great friend and President of Key Life Network, told me he found the small gravestone of Fanny Crosby, the hymn writer. She reportedly wrote 6,000 hymn lyrics. Her music continues to bless the Christian church after all these years. Blind from an early age, she often used words alluding to sight in her writings. Someone once said, “Aren’t you sad you can’t see?” Her answer: “If I had the choice I would choose blindness because that way the very first face I would ever see is that of Jesus!”

Fanny Crosby’s epitaph reads: “Aunt Fanny – she did what she could.” The other epitaph of note is that of great theologian A.W. Tozer which simply says, “He was a man of God.”

Editor’s note: Fred’s epitaph is only three words, but powerfully express his desire for usefulness: “He stretched others.”

This week think about: 1) When do I feel God using me? 2) What do I want on my gravestone? 3) Who represents Godly character in my life?

Words of Wisdom: “What a wonderful feeling to realize God is using us rather than our using God.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not rely on your own understanding. Acknowledge him in all your ways, and he will make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3: 5,6 NET Bible)

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Tongue Management

Weekly Thought – May 19, 2015

Fred thoroughly enjoyed challenges. He moved a refrigerator by himself once just to see if he could figure out the principles of leveraging. He accepted mental experiments, as well. In his later years when he was bed-bound, he stayed awake all night thinking of punch lines to jokes. At 2:00am, he finally fell asleep.

Your ongoing support and encouragement mean much to us. We gratefully accept the challenge to bring you bite-sized portions of Fred’s wisdom week by week. Please pray for the Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute teams as they begin their preparation for the 2016 schedule.

Tongue Management

Historians credit the discovery of fire as one of the most critical for civilization. Its positive properties are many, but unmanaged it is destructive. Scripture refers to the tongue as similar to fire. Management of this organ starts with the heart. Our speech comes from our inner thoughts and desires.
For the tongue to have freedom, the spirit must have purity. It must be purged of ego, greed, hostility. The poisonous word comes from the toxic heart.

Years ago I was asked to be interim music director for a small church in suburban Nashville. When I agreed, the pastor asked me to sign a covenant stating I would not criticize anyone while I was there. I agreed to do it almost as an experiment, for it was so contrary to my general disposition. After a few months I realized I never felt more community than I did there. As I look back, I realize it was the fact of refusing to say anything negative about anyone that made the difference. I could face any person there with complete freedom because I had never said a hurtful word about anyone.

The Wrong Question

How tired I get of hearing people question the goodness of God by saying, “How could a loving God let my dear one die with cancer?” Disease came with the fall, not the callousness of God. The question is, “What evil did we bring on ourselves when Adam and Eve sinned?” We live in a fallen world bearing the consequences of disease, disastrous choices, and disabling habits. To question the character of God because we either don’t understand or don’t accept is immature thinking. We can struggle with the outcomes, but we must correctly ask the questions. Too seldom do I hear Satan blamed. He has become the practitioner of transference, ascribing to God his nefarious activities. Out eternal enemy is Satan but he, like some of our political leaders, is a great spinmeister and gets us to perceive either God or other believers as our enemy. The question we must always be asking is, “How can we know God for who He is?”

This week think about: 1) How well do I manage my tongue? Do “tongues of fire” defeat me more than I like? 2) What would a week without a critical remark look like? 3) What am I learning about the nature of God right now?

Words of Wisdom: “For the tongue to have freedom, the spirit must have purity. It must be purged of ego, greed, hostility. The poisonous word comes from the toxic heart.”

Wisdom from the Word: “If someone thinks he is religious yet does not bridle his tongue, and so deceives his heart, his religion is futile.” (James 1:26 NET Bible)

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Everyone is Motivated

Weekly Thought – May 12, 2015

Fred’s interest in how people think and act enabled him to serve his management consulting clients well. He operated intuitively, understanding the principles of body language, word choice, and behavior. He also studied human nature through reading, associations, and constant observation.

The Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute is an outreach of the BWF Project, Inc. which began as a way to “relevantly communicate the lifework of Fred Smith, Sr.” We now extended the work throughout the country by touching Christian college campuses with our focus on “stretching and blessing the next generation of leaders… to the glory of God.”

Everyone is Motivated

We use motivation as if it were only a forward motion at various speeds. This is a misunderstanding.
Those who are doing nothing are motivated to do nothing. Those who are active are motivated by activity. If we are to stimulate people with the desire to do nothing, we have to overcome the fundamental motivation to do nothing. Forward motion isn’t automatic.

I was told by a corporate president who manufactured railroad engines that the biggest problem was getting enough power to start the train rolling. Aircraft designers have to build in enough power to break the pull of gravity before they can ascend.

As leaders we need to recognize that inertia is motivation-based, not just the lack of motivation.

Creating Thirst

Dr. Howard Rome, the eminent psychiatrist, once told me: “Fred, you don’t understand motivation until you understand thirst. Motivation is satisfying a thirst.”

When Howard said that, I thought about the church. Many pastors are presenting water to non-thirsty members. The person who doesn’t want to understand scripture doesn’t listen, even to the very best teaching. Pastors who are thirsty to teach and preach the Bible must find listeners with the desire to hear. This may be one of the great frustrations in preaching.

In any situation, we must first recognize the lack of thirst and strive to create it before we can provide the satisfactory quenching they will gladly receive.

The Power of Passion

The respected church consultant, Lyle Schaller, has said, “If a pastor does not have a passion for the mission, he can forget the rest of leadership.” A passion to make a worthwhile difference is indispensable to effectiveness. Passion and vision need to work together. Passion energizes vision, and vision disciplines the passion. The clearer the vision, the greater the passion.

This week think about: 1) How clear is my vision? 2) What motivates me – to activity and inactivity? 3) When do I operate most effectively within my passion?

Words of Wisdom: “The clearer the vision, the greater the passion.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be satisfied.” (Matthew 5:6 NET Bible)

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A Real Fire

Weekly Thought – May 5, 2015

Fred and Mary Alice married in June, 1937. Without money, a honeymoon was impossible. They boarded a trolley in downtown Nashville, rode to a Krystal burger restaurant and shared a slider, the little bite-sized menu item. In some ways, his mini-essays are wisdom sliders – bite-sized servings of thought.

A Real Fire

A.W. Tozer remarked that his flame might be small but it was real. It is important that the fire be authentic. One can start a forest fire with a single match, but can’t light a bonfire with a poster of a match, no matter how blazing the flame. A picture of a blowtorch remains a picture. The counterfeit life becomes old but the zeal of the dedicated life cannot be quenched.

Healthy Attrition

A certain attrition rate in leadership is healthy. The armed services actually look for a wash-out percentage… the Army has seven; the Marines have fourteen and it is rumored some drill sergeants think it should be as much as twenty-five percent!

We don’t focus on disqualifying people, but we should not keep people in our organizations who self-disqualify either by lack of character or gifts.

Making people aware of their shortcomings isn’t easy, but is crucial. I say this knowing how painful discouragement can be. It happened to me. I started out in voice lessons, hoping for an operatic career. Fortunately, I had an honest teacher. One morning after a lesson he said, “Fred, you have everything to be a successful vocal artist. You work harder than any of my other students; you have a great desire to sing well. You are only lacking one thing – talent. You are sacrificing to study with me. You can’t make it professionally, so don’t waste your life trying.”

He was so right and so courageous. He blessed me with his honesty. I went into business where I was talented.

Helping someone discern their gifts is one of the great joys. Assisting men and women to exit as well as enter careers is an act of wisdom.

Seminaries should discourage poor leaders before they assume pastoral positions and demonstrate their inabilities. Always remember what Spurgeon told his young preaching students: “Young man, if you can’t speak, you weren’t called to preach.” Certainly God can develop skills that are immature, but rarely does He call us to work for which He doesn’t gift us.

This week think about: 1) Who helped me recognize my strengths? 2) Where am I trying to follow a dream that may not be mine? 3) How real is my fire?

Words of Wisdom: “We don’t focus on disqualifying people, but we should not keep people in our organizations who self-disqualify either by lack of character or gifts.”

Wisdom from the Word: “For the gifts and the call of God are irrevocable.” (Romans 11:29 NET Bible)

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Political Positioning

Weekly Thought – April 28, 2015

Fred enjoyed taking an idea and chasing it down. As we enter into his “blogosphere” with his mini-essays, we get a glimpse of this mental exercise. Golf was one of his great loves, so inspiration from this sport is very natural.

We appreciate all who are part of the BWF community. Your interest, your encouragement, and your support are gratefully received.

Political Positioning

To place an individual in a position outside his gift for political purposes is leadership prostitution.
God has endowed each person with gift that will glorify Himself. When we use the person for our own political security without regard for their gifting we are taking something that should be honoring God and taking it for our own benefit.

I refuse to work outside my gift even though I have received a great deal of pressure to assume work expectations out of loyalty to my friend, the leader.

I have listened to many Sunday School teachers who definitely lacked the gift of teaching. They were organizational loyalists and caved into the pleadings of a friend who needed to fill the teaching roster. Sadly, even religious associations promote some to leadership out of expediency or “they deserved it” thinking. When they have none of the gifts necessary they either flail or fail. Or, they carry the title and someone else does the work. (more…)

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It Works

Weekly Thoughts – April 21, 2015

Fred blogged before blogging was cool (or even a word). Often in the middle of the night he awoke, grabbed his tape recorder, and created what he called “mini essays.” They capture a thought in post-size pieces. Two of them are shared and more will come. Fred is regarded as “timely and timeless” because his thinking fit way before and way after his time.

THANK YOU for praying as we begin the planning for the 2016 Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institutes.

It Works

Recently I attended a Guideposts seminar on “The Power of Positive Thinking in Business.” Attending was a very bright woman executive who was EVP of a large corporation. During the break she wanted to visit.

In the conversation she said, I used to be a Methodist but now I’m an all-out New Ager because it works for me. She said it with such emphasis, conviction, and triumph I wanted to learn more of her story but the break ended.

When I hear leaders claim God’s blessings on their efforts because “it works” I question their thinking. Many times we rationalize questionable methods as practical because “they work – human methods”.

Is “working” the real test of spiritual endeavors? My friend Warren Hultgren, the former pastor of the First Baptist Church of Tulsa, OK, pointed out to me that “working” is a faulty measure. After all, Moses got water after striking the rock twice… it looked like it worked. But he was denied access into the Promised Land for his disobedience. (more…)

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Education Matters

Weekly Thought – April 14, 2015

Fred highly regarded education. Unable to attend college, he spent a lifetime studying. Often when he spoke at colleges he laughed about having to wear a “choir robe” because he had no doctoral hood. He exemplified a true student who encouraged others in the pursuit of wisdom.

The BWFLI schedule is developing well. Please continue to pray for us as we begin the planning.

Education Matters

President John F. Kennedy, addressing an assemblage of Nobel laureates at the White House, and said, “I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent and human knowledge assembled for a White House dinner since Thomas Jefferson dined alone.”

Education is not solitary. One of the reasons we get together is to pool our knowledge and experience. The purpose isn’t competition, but coordination. Each of us in the room knows something that the others do not. The stimulating challenge is the sharing until you realize what you did not know.

Our political environment demonstrates the necessity of true education. In a cynical moment Robert Louis Stevenson said, “Politics is the only profession for which no preparation is thought necessary.” In today’s complex world this opinion is proven false.

Aristotle believed that proper governance depended on the education of the youth. But what they learn is critical. Through formal education, each generation can build on the knowledge of the prior. I believe this is only true if we accept the principles that the knowledge produced. If we deny the principles, then we are starting to reinvent the wheel. And the preparation needed for leadership is lacking. (more…)

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