BWFLI
  • Facebook
  • Home
  • Blogs
    • Brenda’s Blog
      • Brenda’s Blog
      • About Brenda A. Smith
    • Weekly Thoughts
    • Breakfast With Fred
      • What is Breakfast With Fred?
      • About Fred Smith, Sr.
      • Breakfast With Fred website
  • BWFLI Roundtable
    • BWFLI Launches the Roundtable
    • Introduction-Schedule-Bios
    • Ron Glosser-Fred Smith chapter
    • Perseverance Book
    • 200 Mentoring Questions
    • Jarvis College BWFLI poster
    • Alice Lloyd College poster
    • Lindsey Wilson College poster
  • Leadership Online
    • Leadership Team
  • About Us
    • What is BWFLI?
    • What is Breakfast With Fred?
    • About Fred Smith, Sr.
    • About Brenda A. Smith
    • Contact Us
  • Please Donate
    • Click Here to Donate
    • Why Give to BWF Project, Inc.?
01 BWFLI-ETBU Team 02 Cliff Shiepe ETBU 03 Midnight session ETBU 04 Bill Glass ETBU 05 Emily Prevost-Brenda Smith ETBU

BWFLI team stretching and blessing the next generation of leaders at East Texas Baptist University

Cliff Shiepe, best-selling author, inspires students

ETBU students gathered at midnight to discuss “What’s Next” and job market tips

Former All-American, All-Pro Bill Glass stirring the athletes

ETBU Steering Committee Chair Emily Prevost and BWFLI President Brenda A. Smith sharing a celebratory moment

  • 01 BWFLI-ETBU Team

    BWFLI team stretching and blessing the next generation of leaders at East Texas Baptist University

  • 02 Cliff Shiepe ETBU

    Cliff Shiepe, best-selling author, inspires students

  • 03 Midnight session ETBU

    ETBU students gathered at midnight to discuss “What’s Next” and job market tips

  • 04 Bill Glass ETBU

    Former All-American, All-Pro Bill Glass stirring the athletes

  • 05 Emily Prevost-Brenda Smith ETBU

    ETBU Steering Committee Chair Emily Prevost and BWFLI President Brenda A. Smith sharing a celebratory moment

Two Bucks of Blessing

Brenda’s Blog – March 21, 2023

“I want to bless you. There is one caveat: you cannot spend this. You may keep it as a reminder of how He blesses, or you may give it away to another to bless them.”

A woman sat down next to me at the leadership meeting. Immediately we clicked. Her warmth, enthusiasm, and obvious leadership experience told me this was going to be a good day. When lunchtime came we found seats by ourselves as the remainder of the group filled up the nearby tables. We began discussing the morning’s speakers, our takeaways, and then our stories.

She spoke of nearly 70 years of career accomplishments, family highlights, and a strong emphasis on her faith. After that she began telling me about the impact of scripture on her, particularly the wisdom books. She continued to talk about the vision for empowering others through the words of scripture. The details about open doors, ah-h moments, and the sense of God’s tailwind carried us through Texas barbecue and way into the afternoon program. The lunch tables filled, and emptied as we sat there.

We finally headed for the parking lot nearly two hours later. She stopped me and said, “You have blessed me by listening. You allowed me to talk through some of the cloudy places in my dream. I want to bless you.” She opened her purse and pulled out a stack of crisp, new bills. Feeling very embarrassed I protested. Then she handed me a brand new $2.00 bill.

“I keep these with me all the time. When I am blessed by the Lord through someone I give them one. It isn’t a tip, it is my way of saying, ‘thank you for being used by God to bless me.”

Her admonition followed about the way to use it. I will keep that $2.00 bill as a sweet reminder of the precious time on a day when nothing like that was expected. And even more, it will prompt me to thank others for blessing me.

That bill touched a deep place in my heart. When I was young my widowed paternal Grandmother with very few financial resources would send each of her numerous grandchildren a birthday card with a $2.00 bill enclosed. As a child I thought little of it – I discounted the value of such a small amount. But as I grew older I knew it was treasure because it was the “widow’s mite” indeed. She blessed me.

Read More

Thinking Clearly About God

Weekly Thought – March 21, 2023

Fred would often say “there’s magic in believing if you don’t believe in magic.” He firmly believed in the power of the Spirit, but he did not support superstition and what he called “over spiritualizing.” In a speech given forty years ago he gave illustrations of healthy, mature thinking about God’s direction in our lives.

Thinking Clearly About God

After I spoke at the Reformed Seminary one of the students said to me, “Mr. Smith, God’s got me just where He wants me.” When I asked him where that was he answered, “Broke.” I told him my wife and I have a son and I would feel very disappointed if he said I had him just where I wanted him when he was broke. I don’t really see that as the proper image of a heavenly Father.

I think I told you of the lawyer who came to see me about five years after becoming a Christian. He said, “God is disciplining me. I became a Christian and decided to make my practice of law a ministry rather than a profession and so I have been letting Christians pay me what they felt I was worth.” I replied, “You’re broke, aren’t you?” He was surprised at my response. I told him the Lord wasn’t disciplining him – “you are suffering the consequences of your own stupidity.” Then I gave him $2500 to pay his bills. He went back into the practice of law as a professional and grew a successful firm. He had spiritualized a bad decision.

I believe problems should be analyzed. I don’t believe we should over spiritualize but understand the concept of cause and effect. While I do not think the problem should be spiritualized. I am going to surprise you and say I do feel the answer should be.

Let me give you four examples of spiritualizing correctly. The key is letting faith do these four:

1) Create a positive environment in which you feel the problem can be solved. I have never found an answer that I didn’t believe had a solution.
2) Faith gives us concentration, and we can’t reach our potential until we concentrate;
3) Faith gives us energy, for it is so much easier to work with a problem you feel you can solve than one you can’t.
4) Faith affects our attitude. It lets us accept winning or losing with equilibrium after we have done our best.

To me, spiritualizing the answer isn’t making up some spooky ritual or strange way of thinking, but it is bringing into our solutions the divine help which is available to us through the Spirit. It is not asking for miracles or devising irrational ways of thinking but asking for His divine presence in the process.

This week think about: 1) How careful am I to keep my mind disciplined to avoid wrong views of God? 2) What is my process for finding answers? 3) What role does spiritual help play in decision making?

Words of Wisdom: “I don’t believe we should over spiritualize but understand the concept of cause and effect.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Yes, I find delight in your rules; they give me guidance.” (Psalm 119:24 NET Bible)

Read More

Humor for All Seasons

Weekly Thought – March 14, 2023

Fred was a student of humor. In fact, he was a philosophical analyst of its use – and abuse. He wanted to write an entire book on it, but didn’t. However, he put thoughts down as part of an interview which is excerpted this week.

Humor for All Seasons

Humor is a good way to stay connected with me. One of my long time friends’ networks sends clippings, cartoons, and funny stories. We find a quick smile is a fine way to communicate. There are days when a good cartoon is the right fit.

I feel strongly it is good to use humor to take responsibility for relieving embarrassing, tense, or combative situations. When you can do good it is important to use humor correctly. In these situations you could be improving relationships, giving time for parties to think, and probably giving a psychological break. These are healthy uses.

Someone who insists on telling a story whether it fits or not, or serves a purpose or not is abusive. This is taking up the time of others without bringing something positive to the situation. A person who tries to be funny is usually a humor abuser. I have been in social events when one attendee dominated with puny attempts at being humorous. He was not adding to the atmosphere – he was doing nothing but wanting attention and control. A friend of mine told me he was the kind of man who would say, “Here I am doing all the talking and telling you all about myself when what I want is for you to be talking… about me!”
I can tell much about a person’s character, and especially humility. Self-deprecating humor can be helpful, but it has to have a point. Father Hesburgh, President of Notre Dame tells of the time during the 1960s and the Hippies. When demonstrators tried to take over the campus he met with the leaders. He offered his hand but the man refused. After the conversation the Dean who met with them said, “Father, I would have kicked them in the pants. Why didn’t you?” The President said, “My job isn’t to kick students but to educate them.” He took a backseat to pull the stinger.

Humor is an excellent asset. Like any other, it must be valued and developed.

This week think carefully about: 1) How do I use humor in business, family, social activities? 2) When do I laugh most heartily? 3) Who do I know who uses humor well?

Words of Wisdom: “Humor is an excellent asset. Like any other, it must be valued and developed.”

Wisdom from the Word: “He will yet fill your mouth with laughter, and your lips with gladness.” (Job 8:21 NET Bible)

Read More

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Brenda’s Blog – March 7, 2023

“The difference is that they respect us.”

You would probably guess a long while but before identifying the source of that comment. It was a State Jail speaking of the guards. The incarcerated young man had much experience with correction institutions.

Currently serving in a private, corporately owned facility the remark came when asked to give advice for new guards. “Too many of them lean on their power, their toughness, and their spitefulness. They can be effective without dehumanizing and demeaning. The difference in this place is that the guards treat us like human beings, not animals. I guess, the bottom line would be… they respect us.”

Aretha Franklin famously made respect a part of the American vernacular, spelling it out letter by letter.

Theologians tell us we are created in the image of God. We are not a random gathering of molecules, but a purposeful creation worthy of dignity and respect. It isn’t always easy to see this in everyone, but when we do we can change lives.

Have you ever eaten in a restaurant and not even looked into the face of the server? In needing something we are asked, “Who is your server?” Not able to answer that we fail the second question, “What do they look like?” Practicing respect can begin in the smallest encounters.

You surely have been in a line of frustrated travelers waiting for news on a cancelled or delayed flight, right? Is it a peaceful, respectful place? Absolutely not! The airline employee with no ability whatsoever to change the circumstances bears the brunt of angry, often abusive customers. What a difference you could make in that person’s day (week, month, year…) if your response is respect, civility. Controlling our attitude under stress is an early step in expressing respect.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T is the recognition of another’s value and acting on it.

Read More

Winning and Losing

Weekly Thought – March 7, 2023

Fred observed the social environment long before it became the thing to do. He understood the “cultural moment” before anybody put those words together to describe where we live. He lived watching the correlation between Biblical principles and modern American culture. The influence of winning and losing is this week’s topic (probably written in the 1950s or 1960s).

Winning and Losing

Winning is a national addiction. Preachers, athletes, businessmen must have visibility and success. Criminals who commit bold crimes and get national coverage garner publicity and get strangely recognized. All of us must be winners – it is a national duty.
We love winners and likewise we dislike losers. We regard losing as a contagious disease so we distance ourselves.

Yet, there is a time to lose. You can be objective as you think about it. I sat down and jotted down for myself four reasons to lose:

1) When winning costs my self-respect, it is better to lose. I think of self-respect as the little guy who lives deep down inside of me. When I wake up at 3:00 am I check with him. If it is thumbs up, I can go back to sleep. But if he won’t talk to me and doesn’t believe the excuses I give, I know I am in trouble. It is critical that I stay in the clear with the little guy.

2) If winning costs me my health that is too much. I have seen too many men who stayed on jobs that have killed them, but their pride kept them in the job. No job, no success is worth that price. I made the decision in advance I would not pay it.

3) No amount of success is worth my family… they are more valuable than any other success. I frequently hear older men tell me they sacrificed their families for their business achievement. They wanted success more than happy families. The loss of family was one of the payments they paid to purchase personal success.

4) Success is too costly when it severs my relation with God. This life is not the game – this life is the practice for the game that is to come. God owns the stadium and I would like to play on His team… forever. If I have to choose between my God and my success that choice has already been made: “Here I stand, so help me, God.”

This week think carefully about: 1) How serious am I about self-respect, health, family, and faith? 2) Which of these points hits home for me? 3) Who can I encourage to consider the cost of success?

Words of Wisdom: “We love winners and likewise we dislike losers. We regard losing as a contagious disease so we distance ourselves.”

Wisdom from the Word: “For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life because of me will save it.”(Luke 9:24 NET Bible)

Read More

Rights versus Responsibilities

Weekly Thought – February 28, 2023

Fred clearly differentiated between rights and responsibilities. He saw asserted rights taking people apart while his visual for responsibilities was lamination which pulled pieces together into one, making it stronger. He viewed operating from “it’s my right” position a sign of immaturity. Maturity and strong character lived with a sense of responsibility.

Rights versus Responsibilities

As a leader I have the responsibility for certain tasks and I must take an active role for execution. In fact, sometimes I will take the same action for results from a responsibility position as could be taken as a matter of rights. What is the difference? Motive and maturity. Responsibility has a selfless tone to it while rights carry a selfishness. This shows up in the attitude.

For example, the players in the huddle may be a scene of discussion – even disagreement- but when it comes to the call the quarterback makes the decision. Why? Because it is his responsibility, not because it is his right to do so.

We hear a lot about human rights. This was not the great gift of America it was a matter of human responsibilities. Often we speak about the success of the “American experiment” because it provided freedom. I don’t think so. I am convinced it was the first time in human history that freedom and a sense of responsibility came together simultaneously. Freedom was the environment and responsibility was the operational attitude. That is what gave us our enormous productivity.

The belief that God gave everyone a talent and one day we would account for its use was foundational.

These two concepts will always be in tension, but responsibility should be the primary motivator while rights take the secondary place. When I look at my responses to situations I find that generally I am more concerned about my rights when I feel that someone is taking advantage of it – when someone’s playing me for a sucker. That is unpleasant (to say the least) for me. In those situations I have a responsibility to behave maturely, but exercise my responsibility to not be played. Mahatma Gandhi was not exercising his rights as much as he was emphasizing his responsibility to create a society built on righteousness.

Motive, again, is the key. Generally, rights are about getting; responsibilities about giving.

This week think about: 1) When do I operate from rights rather than responsibilities? 2) How can I measure my attitude in tense situations? 3) What standards am I using to assess my maturity?

Words of Wisdom: “I am convinced it was the first time in human history that freedom and a sense of responsibility came together simultaneously. Freedom was the environment and responsibility was the operational attitude.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Aaron and his sons will go in and appoint each man to his service and his responsibility. (Numbers 4:19 NET Bible)

Read More