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  • 2017 (Page 6)

Giving With Joy

Weekly Thought – May 9, 2017

Fred’s generosity covered financial support, but also the use of wisdom, time, and presence. His thoughts on giving were often sought by those who wanted to be good stewards. His ability to “sit loose to things” (a phrase he gleaned from Oswald Chambers) allowed him to give with great freedom.

Thank you for your ongoing support as BWFLI continues to impact Christian college and university campuses. Since our first event in 2008 we have brought 16 teams in contact with over 15,000 students. Your continued friendship through prayer and financial giving is greatly appreciated.

Giving With Joy

Money is an important scriptural concern. It shapes life in America as much or more than any other single item.

Here are several principles to consider for personal giving and also while leading others to give with integrity.

1) Giving may be harder than earning. A lifestyle of giving away money may be both difficult and dangerous. I say difficult because profitable stewardship requires a new and often more difficult discipline than making the money. It is dangerous because many temptations confront those with money to give.

2) Giving must move from duty to joy. The sheer administrative monotony of philanthropy can steal the joy. Administration is constant and often kills the delight. Freedom comes in crossing the line from duty to joy. Theologically, freedom comes in moving from works to grace.

3) Generous giving is a lifestyle. This involves more than the money or appreciated assets, techniques, or programs. It involves our spiritual maturity. How often am I willing to pray, “Lord, prosper me financially in proportion to my spiritual maturity?” What a snare if we try to bribe God with financial gifts to rationalize our failure to offer Him our spiritual gifts.

4) Motive is imperative. Biblical wisdom tells us “Out of the heart are the issues of life.” In the New Testament the story of Ananias and Sapphira warns us of wrong motives. As you remember, they claimed to donate 100%, but in actually held some back for themselves. They were greedy for credit and it cost them their lives. Their sin wasn’t in the reduced gift – it was the increased greed.

Obedient giving is not to obligate God, but to follow Him. We need to give – He doesn’t need the money. The glory which accrues to Him is the goal – along with our maturity.

This week think about: 1) How serious am I about my giving? 2) When I consider my stewardship do I just think about money? 3) What will increase my joy in giving?

Words of Wisdom: “Theologically, freedom comes in moving from works to grace.”

Wisdom from the Word: “And you, Solomon my son, obey the God of your father and serve him with a submissive attitude and a willing spirit, for the LORD examines all minds and understands every motive of one’s thoughts. If you seek him, he will let you find him, but if you abandon him, he will reject you permanently.” (1 Chronicles 28:9 NET Bible)

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Overcoming, not Overwhelming

Weekly Thought – May 2, 2017

Fred believed we have much to learn from our enemies. He also believed we are known by not only the friends, but also our enemies. He also believed in external and internal opposition. “Sometimes we are our own worst enemy.”

Overcoming, not Overwhelming

Pilgrim’s Progress by John Bunyan tells the story of Christian and his trek to the Celestial City. Along the way are the City of Delight and the Valley of Despair. He starts on his way, determined to persevere, but the enemies actively pursue him. Successful perseverance comes by overcoming the enemies cleverly disguised, and customized to fit each traveler and each situation.

Many of our obstacles may be external, but the most serious are generally internal. When I was a director of the S.H Kress Company, I visited the stores and asked the manager about his problems. If he described them as externally driven, I doubted his managerial capabilities. If he discussed the internal problems, I knew we had a manager with potential for progress. This manager defined situations he could do something about. Certainly, there were external threats, but most were out of his control.

Each step of the perseverance process comes back to building good mental disciplines. Fighting the enemies of endurance requires good habits. Start with a reflex, and then train it into a habit. Habits are our friends.

A couple came to see me saying, “We have a problem.” As I listened, it became clear she had nothing to do with the creation of the problem. Yet, she maturely accepted ownership as half of the marriage partnership. She could have easily said (and I have heard it many times before), “This stupid husband of mine, much against my advice, lost our money.” But she didn’t. And, eventually they worked together to find an answer. She knew that resolution, not recrimination, was the road to solution.

How easy it is in rough times to point fingers and shift blame. From childhood we learn to respond like a quick draw sharpshooter.”It’s not my fault.” Our third grandchild is a boy named Jeff. He was born behind two strong-willed sisters. One day when he was still a pre-schooler our daughter heard him mumbling to himself. She got close enough to hear, “Not my fault, not my fault, not my fault.” “Jeff, what did you do?” “Nothing – I’m just practicing for when Heather and Meredith blame me.”

This week think about: 1) What reflexes am I honing into good habits? 2) What are the customary pitfalls on my journey? 3) How do I assess my external and internal threats?

Words of Wisdom: “She knew that resolution, not recrimination, was the road to solution.”

Wisdom from the Word: “You have joy, Israel! Who is like you? You are a people delivered by the Lord, your protective shield and your exalted sword. May your enemies cringe before you; may you trample on their backs.” (Deuteronomy 33:29 NET Bible)

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One Day at a Time

Brenda’s Blog – April 25, 2017

“Daily use will prevent soap scum, hard water, and other stains.”

The Clean Shower dispenser sits on my shower seat. I see it every day and finally it connected with me on a spiritual level.

In a Christian’s life what can be used daily to prevent scum and stains? What do we need to apply day by day to protect us from the building up of yuck?

A clean relationship with the Lord and others comes through regular application of prayer, Bible reading, meditation, and fellowship with believers. These need to be sprayed generously and regularly to avoid the pollution of this world.

If I miss days in my shower, the work to restore the cleanliness requires more work. If I miss days of conversing with God through Bible study, prayer, and communion with others I start seeing the soap scum gathering around the edges of my soul. I can never lose my salvation, but I can lose the joy of my salvation.

As I squirt Clean Shower I need to remember to cover the corners of my spiritual life, as well.

For me this means starting the day out with the recital of The Lord’s Prayer. Not because it is a personal prayer, but because it is a “we prayer” – praying for the entire Body of Christ. It connects me with others as I ask our great God to provide, and protect.

Then I put on the spiritual armor. This is crucial to avoid the hard stains of the world. I put on the helmet of salvation, the breastplate of righteousness, the truth belt, the peace shoes, stand behind the shield of faith, and then take in my hand the sword of the Spirit which is the word of God… then having done this I pray at all times in the Spirit.

There is no absolute guarantee that sin and slime won’t affect me, but daily doses of spiritual disciplines will certainly reduce the long-term effects.

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Ideas on Motivation

Weekly Thought – April 25, 2017

Fred consciously motivated people. He spent hours thinking about those in his network and how to stretch them. He thought of himself as a conduit for several of his friends who were speakers. As he read, listened, thought, he would put “material” into mental files to be accessed when he talked with any of these three people. He wanted to be part of their growth – and the use of their great gifts.

Ideas on Motivation

One of the ways I motivate people to think is always carrying blank cards in my pocket. When anyone says something worth writing down, I do. For years I tried to keep mental notes of memorable lines and then jot them down later. Then I realized the positive effect of asking someone, “May I write that down?” Often I get the response, “I didn’t know it was that good!”

People love to be quoted and doing so motivates them to think better. One of the nicest compliments you can earn is “He makes me think smart when I’m with him.” It’s a sign you are motivating people to think.

One of my early bosses had a way of saying nice things about his employees which would get back to them. True things which were nice. We appreciated it and worked hard to keep on doing things which he could notice. People work hard to uphold a good reputation.

Ask “what is special about this person?” For example, some people have a way of focusing on the positive in people. That can give you an opportunity to say “Here’s a person who looks for the best in others.” It not only strengthens the person, but gives them an idea of what you value.

I have consciously augmented my wife’s reputation as a creative listener. She is. I began doing it to comfort her because she was ill at ease in social situations and felt that she had little to say. We would come home and she would lament, “All I did was listen.”

One night at a dinner party, she was sitting next to a powerful top executive. His wife, seated next to me said, “Oh, I feel sorry for your wife having to sit next to my husband.” I replied, “He will talk his head off.” “You don’t know him at all then.” “No, I don’t know him, but I know my wife.” Sure enough, this man with the surly reputation did talk his head off. I am sure his wife wondered what in the world happened to him. What happened was Mary Alice. She had the ability to listen dynamically, to make people feel comfortable, and smart. She didn’t compete with him, and he thoroughly enjoyed the evening.

Effective leaders work to develop motivational strategies. They spend time thinking about specific techniques which are sincere motivation, not shallow manipulation.

This week think about: 1) Who is one of the best motivators I know? 2) How can I know the people around me and motivate them more strongly? 3) What is my motivation to motivate others?

Words of Wisdom: “People work hard to uphold a good reputation.”

Wisdom from the Word: “For everything that was written in former times was written for our instruction, so that through endurance and through encouragement of the scriptures we may have hope.” (Romans 15:4 NET Bible)

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Motivation or Manipulation?

Weekly Thought – April 18, 2017

Fred refused to sacrifice his integrity for the sake of winning. He believed in the value of moving people to action, but never tricked them into action which only benefited him. His dear friend Zig Ziglar dedicated his life to inspiring and motivating others. They shared the joy of seeing the wood catch fire.

Motivation or Manipulation?

There is a critical difference between motivation and manipulation. One is getting people to do something from mutual advantage. The other is getting people to do what you want them to do, primarily for your advantage. If the person benefits, it’s purely a secondary goal.

Manipulation carries a hidden agenda; motivation carries an open agenda.

We all agree that motivation is good and manipulation is bad. But sometimes only a fine line separates the two, and it’s difficult to know which side of the line you are standing. The issues aren’t always clear-cut. Intent is the key. What could be motivation in one instance could be tainted by self-interest and turned into manipulation.

A psychiatrist friend chided me one night by saying, “You businessmen mistake manipulation for motivation. The difference is you can substitute the word “thirst” for motivation, but not manipulation.” That got my mind working. He was saying unless you are satisfying someone’s thirst, you are probably manipulating rather than motivating. What a simple, yet effective, measurement. Bottom line for me: I can motivate with integrity when I am bringing to consciousness a genuine thirst in another.

Whenever we try to motivate without the other person’s knowing what we are doing we need to be very careful. We can try to bring out a latent desire a person doesn’t even know exists. But we must always keep in mind: 1) recognize how close we are to manipulation; 2) set a checkpoint, and be willing to stop if an authentic thirst doesn’t develop; 3) never resort to immoral means even for righteous ends.

My good friend Zig Ziglar reminded my daughter one time to be sure and understand the difference between the “need to” and the “want to.” He was saying to her she must move away from her clear vision of what someone needed until she satisfied their own desire and want.

Remember the little boy whose obedience was not willing? “I may be sitting down on the outside, but I’m standing up on the inside.” Manipulation often results in silent rebellion. True motivation is a path to growth and maturity.

This week think about: 1) What motivates me to take action? 2) How do protect myself from manipulation? 3) Who can I help find their “thirst” this week?

Words of Wisdom: “Bottom line for me: I can motivate with integrity when I am bringing to consciousness a genuine thirst in another.”

Wisdom from the Word: “This is the reason I do my best to always have a clear conscience toward God and toward people.” (Acts 24:16 NET Bible)

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Precious Memories

Brenda’s Blog – April 11, 2017

“Make a memory with me tonight.”

My sweet 94 year old friend Nance sat across the table at our weekly night out. Suddenly she started singing: “Make a memory with me tonight. I will put my arms around you and hold you tight; So tomorrow we will say ‘Wasn’t it a delightful yesterday?’”

WOW! What a moment.

When we were growing up, memories were high value items. My parents always talked about “putting deposits in the memory bank.” As we became parents (and now grandparents) we carried on the tradition. The accumulation of material possessions took second place to the opportunity of sharing stories, experiences, and time.

Before we close our eyes each night, perhaps it would be good to take a minute and check on the deposits made in the memory bank. We don’t need six figure additions – the little ones add up. And sometimes, just an email, text, phone conversation, a cup of coffee together, or a hug can build a solid account.

Reviewing the memories is one of the dividends. Reliving the experiences brings happiness and usually, laughter. Sometimes the harrowing times become the foundation for precious remembrances. Dad used to say to us, “The things you cry about today you will laugh about tomorrow.” Obviously, this applies to non-life threatening, or serious relationship crises. They don’t fall into this category, but the time the dog rolled in mud, ran into the house, and leaped on the couch definitely does! Memory material!

Nance’s husband of nearly 70 years left for heaven two years ago this month. She misses him, but she relishes the stories and the memories they made night after night – and yes, he did hold her tight!

What deposit did you make today? What will help you stop tomorrow and say, “Wasn’t it a delightful yesterday?”

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Training Touchstones

Weekly Thought – April 11, 2017

Fred developed ideas, strategies, and people. He loved seeing growth and progress. He also appreciated the value of measures and metrics. Wanting to know if the process worked led him to define criteria for the effectiveness of training.

Thank you for your consistent, prayerful support of the Breakfast With Fred Leadership Institute. Our next event is April 18, 19, 2017 at Greenville College in Greenville, IL. Please pray for the team members who will be traveling to campus to “stretch and bless the next generation of leaders… to the glory of God.”

Training Touchstones

The development of others is a strategic element in good leadership. Bringing others along to grow the organization is part of the mission. As training moves along, here are five ways to measure progress:

1) Is this person’s job fitting well with his or her talents? If not, I never be successful in fully developing the potential. It is my responsibility to assess the long range outcome and make sure the job and the talent match.

2) How much willingness to do the job am I seeing? I want to see if the person is enthusiastic about the opportunity to grow. Training has to be more than just an interesting way to pass time. And if I suspect the trainee is thinking, “Well, I’ll do it if you want me to, but I’m not really keen on it” I already know not to expect much.

3) How consistent is the person’s effort? Long-term, not sporadic engagement is what I want. It is the day in, day out effort that benefits both the organization and the employee. A friend once told me, “The amateur performs well when he feels like it. The pro performs well whether he feels like it or not.”

4) What are the objective results? I find many people want to tell me about activity, carry on conversations, give me excuses but produce little or nothing. I like to measure what has actually been done. Some people get by for years talking a good game but doing little. In our family we have a saying “Show me the baby, don’t tell me about the labor pains.”

5) Is this person willing to be evaluated? I am not going to spend time developing someone who resists having his results measured. In the same way, I do not want to attempt to train someone who will never ask for help. If a person knew all the answers, they would not need the training. I see too many whose egos won’t allow them to learn from others.

This week carefully consider: 1) How can I use these questions in my development of others? 2) What do I use as the measurement of personal progress? 3) When do I do my most effective training?

Words of Wisdom: “The development of others is a strategic element in good leadership.”

Wisdom from the Word: “A disciple is not greater than his teacher, but everyone when fully trained will be like his teacher.” (Luke 6:40 NET Bible)

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Maximizing Effectiveness

Weekly Thought – April 4, 2017

Fred’s understanding of people created a high demand for his consulting services. He was particularly effective in labor negotiations, sales/marketing campaigns, and board restructuring. He had a clear view and a sound mind when it came to the productivity of organizations. Fred’s ideas were utilized throughout his 60 year business career. Later on Jim Collins popularized these concepts with the “right people in the right seats” language of Good to Great.

Maximizing Effectiveness

The secret of any organization’s success is choosing the right people to play key roles. I recently read about business executive Bernard Tapie who became famous in France by taking over failing corporations and turning them into successful money makers. He developed an empire of 45 companies. His secret: whenever he assumed control of a failing business he immediately brought in his fifteen member management team to reorganize. They worked like a well-oiled machine and repeated the process over and over.

One of the most important aspects of successful leadership is putting together a group of people to carry out the mission. Great athletic coaches know they must have talent to win and so take an active role in the recruiting process. Teams that just happen get happenstance results.

In the small organization staffing can be particularly vexing. But it is extremely important. A costly mistake in smaller operations is thinking they can get by with inferior employees because they aren’t large. Actually, the opposite is true. In a firm of one hundred employees, if one doesn’t pull their weight, it is a loss of 1% productivity. If a company has only 3 employees, one who is unproductive represents 33% of the workforce.

Attracting the right people requires enthusiastically selling your organization to quality prospects. Julian Price who built Jefferson Standard Life Insurance Company surprised the industry by his ability to draw outstanding men and women to a small, regional company in the South. It was small, but mighty in its people pull. In interviewing he would say, “We are going to build a mighty company here. Don’t you want to be part of it?” The challenge of growth and the promise of a future brought many to Greensboro, North Carolina.

Leaders should not be timid about going for the most qualified who bring to the organization the skills needed for growth. When we believe in our vision and our mission it becomes a critical endeavor and one worth sharing. People want to be part of something exciting. Finding the right people to fulfill the dream is the privilege and responsibility of leadership.

This week carefully consider: 1) How strong are my recruiting skills? 2) What is the profile of my ideal team member? 3) When do I enjoy pulling together on a project?

Words of Wisdom: “Teams that just happen get happenstance results.”

Wisdom from the Word: “The one who works his field will have plenty of food, but whoever chases daydreams lacks wisdom.” (Proverbs 12:11 NET Bible)

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Taking Time

Weekly Thought – March 28, 2017

Fred approached every element of his life from a philosophical and theological position. He constructed a system of thought which served as the underpinning. His study of time is a good example.

Taking Time

As Donald Bloesch puts it, “Busyness is the new holiness.” Lack of time is a status symbol, and to me, that is backwards. If you really are somebody, you are in control of your time.

Personally, I think optimizing opportunities and talents is in a sense bringing redemption to everything around me – that is the valid reason to use time well.

These are my philosophical cornerstones:

1) I am a created being and therefore responsible to the Creator for my life.

2) Time is simply life’s clock. Time is a tool – a means in life – never an end. Time is not something to be pursued for its own sake, but for what can be done with it.

3) Since my life is measured by time, I have a responsibility to control it. Most of us don’t let other people spend our money; likewise, we should limit their power to spend our money.

4) I have been given the same amount of time each day as everybody else. The great achievers of the world don’t have any more hours than I do. It is simply untrue to say, “I don’t have enough time.” What is not the same for everybody is energy. Unless I recognize my level of energy and realize that it comes in ebbs and surges, I won’t use my time well. I won’t accomplish all that I could.

5) I also believe that anything I cannot accomplish in the time I have is apparently not my God-given responsibility to achieve. God is not going to hold me accountable for what I cannot do because of genuine lack of time.

6) When I know the ultimate purpose of my life, I can know whether I’m using my time properly. If I do not know that ultimate purpose, I have no way of judging my efficiency. Only God and I can know for sure whether I’m wasting or using.

I decided a long time ago that my ultimate goal in life was to stretch other people. I wanted them to live better, fuller, bigger, more noble than if they hadn’t met me. This is my redeeming call.

This week think about: 1) What is my purpose? 2) How do I assess the use of my time? 3) Where is God using me to stretch others?

Words of Wisdom: “Personally, I think optimizing opportunities and talents is in a sense bringing redemption to everything around me – that is the valid reason to use time well.”

Wisdom from the Word: “God gave Solomon wisdom and very great discernment; the breadth of his understanding was as infinite as the sand on the seashore.” (1 Kings 4:29 NET Bible)

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Hide and Seek

Brenda’s Blog – March 28, 2017

“How much is under your bed?”

In my childhood and teen years I loved to read. I cherished my library card and used it readily.

Only one problem: I had great difficulty returning the books. And when I knew they were overdue, I would hide them under my bed until my Mom demanded they surface and return to their rightful owner – the public library.

This became a metaphor as I grew older. Some people talk about sticking their head in the sand. Not me, I stick it “under the bed.” I put unresolved issues, undone chores, and unattended to duties in a safe, dark place from which they cannot arise and haunt me.

But they eventually do. Like the kind library police who came to the door with a list of books and a demand for their return. In those days they didn’t have those “freebie forgiveness days” when all fines were erased. No, my avoidance technique meant I paid the fines out of babysitting money and puny allowance allotments.

What are the things that are secreted away just because they are either too difficult to handle, too troublesome to manage, or just too overwhelming to attack? Every once in a while I actually face up to them and give them an airing in the light of day. When I do they are usually dealt with in such a short time I wonder (time and time again) why I pushed them away and didn’t just get them done.

In life coaching there is a great term for these items – “tolerations.” We put something on a to-do list, then move it to an even longer one… and so forth until it becomes a perpetual undone. If something is on the to-do list for a day – great. If it is still there after a week it has become a toleration – something we put up with but don’t deal with. They weigh us down as surely as if we were adding layers of weights to our clothing. Tolerations are only removed when they become intolerable.

Let’s climb under the bed and clear out that tattered to do list which grew into moldy tolerations.

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