Brenda’s Blog – February 25, 2025
“When I am 80 I will start cleaning out my house.”
I was 70 when I made that remark thinking 10 years was light years away. Now I am standing eyeball to eyeball with 81 and the house is still warmly filled top to bottom with a lifetime of mementos – and no empty spaces.
I remember pontificating on aging (before I was aged) about the principles of “growing older but never old” to use one of my Dad’s well-known phrases. How clear it was in my 60s. One of my points was the necessity to learn the “pleasure of purging.” What a laugh. My advice: always remember our kids don’t want our stuff, but need our stories. Doesn’t that sound easy? Even fun?
Now I look around and calculate whether I could possibly live long enough to empty shelves. More to the point – what will I do with all the memories stored on those shelves when the occupants are gone? It isn’t just stuff, is it? The moments they represent become the puzzle pieces of a full life.
Cleaning up and out is part of this transitional season… a necessary part. It is too easy to rearrange, form higher stacks, or ignore. How did I begin this yet unfinished task?
1) Set a date to start – probably not 10 years out. Then start.
2) Create a strategy – identify items of legacy importance, box up the “gathering dust” articles and place in the do without pile, ask for wisdom to gift items as memory-makers to friends or institutions.
3) Pray for patience, insight, discernment, and perseverance – there are many stops and starts.
4) Prepare for the joy of passing on stories, and yes, even some stuff. The gift of giving isn’t just about money, but about life lessons, Christian faith, wisdom, and encouragement.
5) Surprise yourself (and your family) as you hold lightly to a lifetime of accumulation, knowing what you have isn’t who you are.