Grounded in Hope

Weekly Thought- July 2, 2019

Fred lived in a state of realistic hope. He disciplined himself to take neither a darkly pessimistic, nor hyper optimistic viewpoint. He challenged others to “wait to worry.” He was a fact-based thinker which allowed him to live in hope while keeping current on the situation and not drifting off into the wish mentality.

2019 is an exciting year for BWF. The revisions on You and Your Network are being done. We are working with Tracey Jones, President of Tremendous Leadership Books. A manuscript for What’s Next is in process, as well. And, of course, the vital and necessary updates on the websites are beginning. Please continue to pray for these projects and if led, please help us financially underwrite these efforts.

Grounded in Hope

The three key words in the closing verses of 1 Corinthians 13 are “faith, hope, and love.” Is the Apostle Paul making a climactic statement that hope is more than faith and love is greater than hope? Certainly, it is one of the controlling emotions in our lives. Faith is largely present, hope is largely future, and love transcends all time. Hope is our belief in the future based on Christ who holds it. Hope is not for the seen, but the unseen much like faith.

As the philosopher said, “a man can stand almost anything as long as he has hope.” When hope goes and hopelessness becomes the ruling emotion, suicide is often the course. Scripture says, “Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is like a tree of life.”

I have a Polish physical therapist whose job is to stretch my muscles back into usefulness after months and months of being bed-bound. I find when he counts out loud I have hope of his quitting because I know the routine and know when the end is coming. When he doesn’t I don’t have the confidence that the end is in sight. Hope energizes patience. It gives reason for tenacity. It promotes discipline in accomplishment.

The source of hope is not hoping in hope, but in putting hope in something larger and more permanent like Scripture, or our belief that our life has purpose – even when we don’t see it. Hope requires a definable object. Hope for the Christian is eternity – the “blessed hope.” That opens the door for us to hope while here on earth. Mary Alice’s favorite hymn was “Take the Name of Jesus With You.” She rocked our three children and sang that song. As we said goodbye to her, the family stood together and sang that hymn. One of the phrases refers to the hope we have in the name of Jesus which is “the hope of earth and joy of heaven.” Another favorite hymn line is : “my hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’s blood and righteousness.” That is hope anchored in reality and truth.

Hope also provides peace for those of us who require objectivity. We can take hope in a changeless God. He can be the standard because he doesn’t waiver. We can hope in who He says He is because he means it.

This week think about: 1) Where is my ultimate hope? 2) How do I distinguish hope from wishing? 3) What allows me to live with hope?

Words of Wisdom: “Hope energizes patience. It gives reason for tenacity. It promotes discipline in accomplishment.”

Wisdom from the Word: “And hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.” (Romans 5:5 NET Bible)

The Value of Network

Weekly Thought – June 25, 2019

Fred and Mary Alice married on June 25, 1937 in Nashville, TN. He loved to say, “We had $5.00 when we married. And if she had saved more we would have had more since it was her $5.00. They rode a trolley downtown and shared a Krystal hamburger for their honeymoon. They celebrated 67 years in 2004 just months before Mary Alice’s death. They truly understood and lived ‘til death do you part.

2019 is the year of reconstruction and repair. The breakfastwithfred.com website has served faithfully, but its functionality is showing severe wear. Would you consider contributing to the website update project? Thank you.

The Value of Network

Networking has various levels and definitions. I want to talk about the qualities of healthy relationships within your personal network.

First, establish mutuality. I maintain the strongest friendships have a foundation of mutual benefit, meaning we can be equally helpful to each other. For example, Jack Modesett and I talk frequently on the phone sharing ideas, quotations, and articles. He knows my major interests and I know his. When each of us sees something we know the other would appreciate, we make a point of sharing it. Mutual benefit.

Second, check out chemistry. By that I mean finding out if you have the same values and philosophy of life. For example, if one is fundamentally selfish and self-focused, this will not fit well with another who sees other-focused as a core value.

Third, assure confidentiality and trust. There are different degrees of relationship in networks. The essential nature of deep relationships leads to knowledge of intimate details. Therefore, the need for absolute confidence and trust is critical.

Fourth, take the necessary time. My mentor, Maxey Jarman, said he could not afford the time to have many friends. In my own relationships I take this responsibility seriously. I will not shoot from the hip or give a top of mind and quick reaction without adequate preparation and thought. My friends count on me to take the time to be their friend. I, also, know my inner circle devotes time to my questions.

Fifth, diversify expertise. I want to have many different areas of expertise in my personal network. For example, when I have a business decision one of the men I call is Lee Roy Mitchell because I am confident in his acumen and experience.

Networks are helpful on minor, as well as major issues. For example, I may simply need the name of someone my memory won’t recall as quickly as I would like. My networking Rolodex includes a most helpful variety of people.

A good network keeps the members apprised of events that would be interesting or helpful. Over the years I enjoy tearing out articles from magazines or newspapers and attaching a small “thought you would be interested” handwritten note before sending it out.

This week carefully think about: 1) Which point sparks my interest? 2) Who in my network helps me grow? 3) What do I need to strengthen my network?

Words of Wisdom: “I maintain the strongest friendships have a foundation of mutual benefit, meaning we can be equally helpful to each other.”

Wisdom from the Word: “This saying is trustworthy, and I want you to insist on such truths, so that those who have placed their faith in God may be intent on engaging in good works. These things are good and beneficial for all people.” (Titus 3:8 NET Bible)

Family Budgeting

Weekly Thought – June 18, 2019

Fred and Mary Alice devoted themselves to fiscal soundness. Growing up in economically depressed situations, they never outgrew their belief in financial responsibility. His thoughts on family budgeting fly in the face of incurring debt and hoping to out run the creditors.

Family Budgeting

Budgeting is done each year. I look back at the prior year, seeing how much money was spent on each category, then decided what amounts needed to be assigned for the present year. Planning always allows for outgo to be less than income. Items like savings, giving, and investment are integral parts of the overall budget.

We separated our needs from our wants from the very beginning. We needed safe transportation so we bought a used car, never a new one. We needed a comfortable home in a secure neighborhood, but never a luxurious one. Mary Alice fed us well, so we minimized our eating out.

Originally, at the beginning of our marriage we set our lifestyle to live on 80% of our income (which was $208 per month); 10% to savings and 10% to tithing. As the income grew we lived on a lower percentage and increased our savings, giving, and investment. Never did we live above our income.

We never bought on the installment plan because we wanted to make interest on our money, not pay it. We determined to pay cash for all luxuries. Mary Alice was given operating money for her part of the budget. She had a separate checking account she managed and I never controlled. We divided the budget into percentages, not dollar amounts. Mary Alice took 25% to run the household. My 75% covered all other expenses, including housing, transportation, insurance, savings, contributions, vacations, and my own personal expenses.

We focused on realistic needs, not wants. And even as our income increased we didn’t increase our spending, but rather increased our saving, giving, and investment. Eventually we lived on 50% of our income.

When our children were in college we bought a second home in Southern Pines, NC. Our friends were all shocked for they had no idea we were financially capable of that expenditure. Living at a 50% level provides freedom.
I want to say a word about my philosophy of money. Money is important, extremely important. I think of it like blood. I make blood to live, but I don’t live to make blood. Money is option. With it you have opportunities; without it your options and opportunities are greatly reduced. Money doesn’t determine your worth. The amount of money you have represents accumulation, not a measure of worth. Savings provide moral freedom. I knew as a young man how critical it was to have enough saved that I could walk away from a job that asked me to do something illegal or immoral. And finally, materialism is often an idol. Giving is the drain plug for greed.
My budget plan isn’t set in concrete. This is just the way Mary Alice and I did it. It worked well for us and I hope you find a philosophy that works well for you.

This week think about: 1) Do I have a philosophy of money? 2) What is my definition of enough? 3) How does money influence my lifestyle decisions?

Words of Wisdom: “And even as our income increased we didn’t increase our spending, but rather increased our saving, giving, and investment.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Your conduct must be free from the love of money and you must be content with what you have, for he has said, ‘I will never leave you and I will never abandon you.’” (Hebrews 13:5 NET Bible)

Too Strange for Arithmetic

Weekly Thought – June 11,2019

Fred believed in the sovereignty of God. His acknowledgement of God’s overarching power and control was a fact of life for him. It did not allow him to shirk his human responsibilities, however. He was wise, discerning, and hopeful. He was pragmatic, intellectually astute and bottom line, as well.

The work has begun on updating the breakfastwithfred.com website. Also, Tracey Jones and her publishing company are working with BWF to do a reprint of You and Your Network. This is a busy year for BWF. Your prayerful support is greatly appreciated. And if you can financially support us as we undertake these large projects, we will accept the gifts with gratitude.

Too Strange for Arithmetic

I got a call from a church on the West Coast where I had spoken for many years at their annual men’s retreat. By this time my physical condition didn’t allow me to travel. They wanted me to do a call which would be broadcast to the audience. Over these years I had built a very close friendship with the group and appreciated this effort.

The retreat was in the mountains. When it came time for the call reception was very spotty. They had multiple technical difficulties with the entire telephone system. Even though their sound men were first class, the retreat center would not help them by letting them use the camp’s phone setup and lines. Without a line they were unable to achieve the conference call which would make this work.

The camp told the church that the lady who lived across the road complained about everything they did and didn’t want to upset her by the use of a temporary generator.

Just as the technicians told the hosts it was impossible a man and his son walked in to register for the retreat. His job was with the phone company! Strangely enough, they had gotten off work, driven up in the work truck which contained all the necessary tools, and spurs for climbing the pole. But the neighbor was still standing in the way.

They went across the road and asked if they could use her phone line for a brief call, explaining the relationship between the group and me – as well as telling them about my being bedbound.

She graciously invited them in, agreed to what they wanted, gave them lemonade, and hugged them when they left. Mission accomplished. When they called me I could hear them clearly and the sound guys said the transmission was top notch.

So many things happened against the odds that we knew the Lord got the credit. Many times His work defies human mathematics. Since then I have seen other occurrences to the point that those around me talk about events being “beyond arithmetic.”

Non-believers may call these “coincidences,” but we who understand the sovereignty of God see them as evidences of His active presence in our everyday lives.

This week think about: 1) When have I had a “beyond arithmetic” experience? 2) How quickly do I acknowledge the hand of God in my day to day? 3) What can I do to trust Him more this week?

Words of Wisdom: “Many times His work defies human mathematics.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Acknowledge God’s power, his sovereignty over Israel, and the power he reveals in the skies!” (Psalm 68:34 NET Bible)

Probing Questions

Weekly Thought – June 4, 2019

Fred enjoyed people who were interested in him, but not curious about him. His questions are a way of expressing that without being invasive. Many of the questions he asks in the mentoring section of the leadership library are helpful for personal evaluation. Here are several with Fred’s casual responses which give you insight into his thinking. He sat down as we threw the questions to him and responded from his deep well of experience and thinking.

June is a month for our schools to begin summer schedules. Join with us on the prayer network as we lift them up before the Lord.

Probing Questions

1) Question: What irritates me? Fred: Small talk and wasted time are two major irritants. And to be frank, I probably have an ego irritation when I feel I have been under-appreciated. This is wrong, but it is true. There is always the irritation of incompatible associates. In my experience, love solves the rub of these irritants.

2) Q: What situations make me feel insecure? Fred: Fortunately (and thankfully) my belief in the gifts I have been given enhances my confidence. When I was young I had no social or educational advantages, but I knew God had given me the ability to think, to communicate, and to network (even before I had any idea what that meant). An evangelist believed in me and said, “Fred, take the gift God has given you, and use it, and you will stand before great men.” That was his paraphrase of Proverbs 18:16. As long as I stay within my gifts I have confidence. I am sure if I wandered randomly outside those areas, I would experience insecurity. Another key: when I feel small with God, I feel confident. When I feel large without Him, I am insecure.

3) Q: What do I do to be liked? Fred: I had much rather be respected than merely liked. When I am respected I can be a leader while just being liked makes me pleasant to be around, but doesn’t really qualify me for leadership. I am eager for certain people in my life (special friends, family) to like me, but I am fortunate to have little or no need to be liked by a great number. I defined myself to myself and that has supported me through periods of favor and disfavor. I found liking myself in key areas of my life and respecting the way I am growing is important – much more than the opinions of those who may not really know me. Self-respect is critical to my health. One additional thing: When I die I want my family (especially my children) to love me, not need me. I want the relationship to be one of mutual respect, not their dependence on me.

This week think about: 1) How would I answer any of these questions if asked? 2) Which question triggers some self-evaluation? 3) How am developing my ability to ask questions?

Words of Wisdom: “When I feel small with God, I feel confident. When I feel large without Him, I am insecure.”

Wisdom from the Word: “When the queen of Sheba heard about Solomon, she came to challenge him with difficult questions.” (1 Kings 10:1 NET Bible)

Discipline of Communication

Weekly Thought – May 28, 2019

Fred knew his gifting included communication. His life verse was a paraphrase given to him by an evangelist when he was a teenager… “Take the gift God has given you, and use it, and you will stand before great men.” (Proverbs 18:16) He worked his entire life honing his skills, stewarding his gift, and using them well.

Would you like to participate with BWF in researching how to use Fred’s material in the decision making process? Please email at Brendaasmith@aol.com

Discipline of Communication

Every leader spends a great deal of the day communicating. Many books are written on the techniques, but the emphasis should be on the spirit, not just on the technique. The why, and the who are essential to creating an effective strategy for how and when. If two people want to talk together, it is almost impossible to fail. One of the hindrances to effective communication is the self-centered motivation. Too many are influenced by their desire to impress, not express.

My friend Zig Ziglar speaks before great audiences inspiring and motivating healthy action. When building teams it is essential to understand how to use communication to the highest degree. Jim Collins wrote about going from “good to great” in your organization. Having properly, genuinely motivated employees is a benefit of good communication.

Most leaders are adequate talkers, but inadequate listeners. The ability to listen creatively and positively depends on the leader’s skill development on four levels: 1) the meaning of the words. Often vocabulary is an evidence of experience, education, and background; 2) the choice of words. I have friends with impeccable word usage. They have a wide, diverse repertoire which allows them to be very specific; 3) the sounds of the words. Words are emotionally charged. We can pick up what is going on just by hearing the tone, and rhythm; 4) the sight of the words. I would say this falls into the body language category. What we say is actually seen in our bodily reactions. When we think we are not communicating, our bodies are sending messages.

Most people listen negatively which is simply keeping silent, or reloading while the other one is shooting. Acquiring the skills of active listening guides the talker both in the giving of facts and a display of emotion which permits the listener to evaluate on more than a surface level.

An important point I want to make: communication is mistakenly confused with agreement. I often hear people comment about the solution to all relationship, management, and social problems is “communication.” The emphasis on talking with each other is the answer which will bring agreement. NOT SO! In my experience there are times that fully understanding what the other person is saying brings more disagreement and conflict. Listening, hearing, and understanding are critical to communication but not synonymous with agreement and concord.

This week think about: 1) How well am I doing with communicating to express, not impress? 2) Which of the listening skills is my strength, weakness? 3) What comes to mind as a communication goal this week?

Words of Wisdom: “We should speak to express, not impress.”

Wisdom from the Word: “A wise person’s heart makes his speech wise and it adds persuasiveness to his words.” (Proverbs 16:23 NET Bible)

Appreciating Tension

Weekly Thought – May 21, 2019

Fred refused to accept ideas at face value, processing everything. Challenging the status quo sharpened his mind. One of the examples is his view of stress. When the modern culture recommended the total reduction of stress, he worked through it identifying positive and negative stress. His thoughts helped others understand how best to handle pressure.

Thank you for supporting the ongoing work of BWF Project. The weekly thoughts reach over 5000 weekly; the campus events touched nearly 20,000; and the two websites give access to a robust source of Fred’s writings. As the updating process begins, we would appreciate your financial help – and prayer, as always.

Appreciating Tension

Successful leaders learn to appreciate tension. I am convinced positive stress is a wonderful thing. Where else would we get the energy to carry out our responsibilities? Even creation shows us the value. Botanists talks about turgor which is the pressure which keeps flower stems upright. Droopy blooms have suffered the loss of this healthy pressure. Without tension there is inadequate ambition to achieve success. Couch potatoes rarely lead.

Stress must be managed, but that is the point: manage, don’t eliminate. Learning to appreciate it, not fear it is the key to productive use of pressure. As a consultant I once asked a young employee as I studied the client’s company. “How long have you been working for this company?” He answered with “Ever since the boss threatened to fire me!” He definitely lacked the fire-in-the-belly necessary for leadership. He was wilted.

I sometimes hear wives complain about how tired their husbands are at night. I know I am biased, but my experience with leaders (male and female) is that living with tension is part of the price paid for success. I am thankful for Mary Alice who has always supported me. My reply to the desire for a non-tension environment is quite simple: “you can’t have the earnings of a race horse with the placidity of a mule.”

A psychiatrist friend of mine (social, not professional, mind you) was sent to Guadalcanal to interview a variety of soldiers. Some had performed heroic deeds; others had shrunk from battle, even deserting. His research was to discern the reason for the behavior. He told me both groups actually were motivated by the same thing: fear. However, those seen as heroes ran forward and the non-heroes ran backward. The same thing is true in business or ministry leadership. We either face our problems as challenges, or we draw into the shell of inertia.

Our assignment is to understand and use positive tension as a tool for productivity. Stress by itself is not naturally bad. We need to capture the value in order to make forward progress. Eliminate all stress? No. Manage and appreciate tension. Definitely.

This week think about: 1) Am I correctly categorizing the stressors in my life? 2) Where am I running backwards? 3) How can I demonstrate capable management of stress?

Words of Wisdom: “You can’t have the earnings of a race horse with the placidity of a mule.”

Wisdom from the Word: “For God did not give us a Spirit of fear but of power and love and self-control.” (2 Timothy 1:7 NET Bible)

Successful Aging

Weekly Thought – May 14, 2019

Fred finished well just two weeks before his 92nd birthday. He thought much about aging and created a strategy for navigating the process. He wrote an article for Leadership Journal with the title “Older, but Never Old.” He lived out those words, for sure.

Successful Aging

My serious interest in aging began with Erik Erikson’s remark: “The challenge of old age is the management of deterioration. Applying the art of management gives one control over the process.” In other words, move the deterioration toward the perimeter of life and focus on the areas of strength and vitality. Avoid the used-to-be syndrome. Too many of my friends refuse to analyze their current strengths, but continue living with the past glories. As I became bedbound I knew my traveling was eliminated. But I still had my mental faculties and my voice, so my daughter arranged for weekly events for people who sat around my bed and listened to me discuss what I had been thinking about during my three dialysis sessions each week. It became affectionately known as “Fred in the Bed.” It was a management technique.

Part of the monitoring of successful aging is asking questions. For me, I break the questions into two categories: positive and negative. Of course, these are designed for my own personality, temperament, character, and temptations. For illustration, I list some of the questions I ask myself:

Love: Where do I fall on the loving scale? How do I avoid benevolent dictatorship?

Patience: How patient am I? Do I accept the difference between excellence and perfection?

Tolerance: Am I Biblically tolerant? Do I know the difference between love and apathy?

Unselfishness: How unselfish am I? How do I implement “in honor preferring one another?”

Commitment: What is my level of commitment to work, family, faith? Am I capable of having passion without crossing over into obsession?

Flexibility: Can I develop a technique without sacrificing stability and principle?

Control: How often do I camouflage this tendency? Do I exhibit dictatorial or victim behavior?

Cynicism: Do I discount the current reality by wanting things to stay the same to make me comfortable?

Greed: Is my desire an appetite or a fire? Do I remember a fire is never satisfied?

Selfishness: How often do I see others as serving me rather than an opportunity to serve?

Concretized: How realistic am I about change?

When I do my self-audit I ask another person for counsel and accountability. This person must be chosen carefully. I am not looking for a critic; I am looking for a coach.

This week carefully consider: 1) What is my strategy for aging? 2) Who models successful aging? 3) What questions should be I be asking myself?

Words of Wisdom: “The end of the process is successful aging – staying young while getting older.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Then Abraham breathed his last and died at a good old age, an old man who had lived a full life. “ (Genesis 25:8a NET Bible)

Firestarter Questions

Weekly Thought – May 7, 2019

Fred’s mentoring questions are a compilation of conversations with the AM/PM group. It met in the morning and was initiated by Peter McNally, thus AM/PM. As they met month by month he would throw a question on the table. On www.breakfastwithfred.com there are over 300 of them for consideration. They serve as a personal exercise, as well as for a group. Fred was asked to give an impromptu answer to his own questions. Here is the unedited text.

BWF Project is excited about the new edition of You and Your Network. It will be available by fall, 2019. The research for What’s Next will continue year long. We invite you to participate in the interview process. Contact us at Brenda@bwfli.com

Firestarter Questions

1) Question; What changes would I make if I could live my life over? Fred: I doubt I would make any changes if the circumstances and options were the same. If I were given hindsight, then certainly I would have taken advantage of many more opportunities. As the wag said, “If I had my life to live over I would live over a delicatessen.” I don’t believe it is profitable to worry about such unchangeable things as our past.

2) Q: What psychological barriers have I permitted in my life? Fred: Psychological barriers can either be temporary or long-lasting. We outgrow the temporary ones. For example, one can be controlled by what others think of us. As we mature, we can overcome this one and have a healthy view of ourselves. The long-term ones are mostly character flaws. We must first recognize them and then develop a plan and time frame to reduce their influence on us. The long-term ones will take serious work, but can be minimized.

3) Q: How much does advertising influence me? Fred: I wish it influenced me less than I am afraid it does. However, I am allergic to nonsensical advertising. In fact, I consider the mute button on the TV remote as one of the greatest inventions of the modern age. Therefore, I mute most commercials. I read the advertisers believe we must see an advertisement nine times in order to become conscious of it. I hope that is true, because I seldom watch an ad more than one time. I am immunizing myself. I saw a survey of the American population saying they are far more influenced by Madison Avenue than by the church. George Gallup wrote a book titled, The Saints Among Us. He says only 10% of those claiming to be born again are really influenced by their faith.

4) Q: Do I have a healthy sense of humor? Fred: As long as I can genuinely laugh at myself rather than laughing at others I will have at least a moderate sense of humor. Much of today’s humor is sick. It does not promote healthy mental attitudes. I always look for any humor in any situation, often finding it. Most of my life I have studied humor because I think it is a vital element. I would like to be able to laugh at only those things which are genuinely funny. Humor should be a bridge between people rather than an obstruction. I have a very intelligent friend who every Sunday morning called one of his friends to read the comics together. We are admonished in scripture to be careful about taking ourselves too seriously. I believe in humor as Gods lubricant in life and certainly as a happy reality.

This week think about: 1) What makes me laugh? 2) What affect does stress have on my sense of humor? 3) How can I discipline my humor to keep it clean and appropriate?

Words of Wisdom: “I don’t believe it is profitable to worry about such unchangeable things as our past.”

Wisdom from the Word: “After three days they found him in the temple courts, sitting among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions.” (Luke 2:46 NET Bible)

Experience to Experiment

Weekly Thought – April 30, 2019

Fred tweeted long before twitter was a concept. He called them “one-liners.” His friends, his associates, even his family carried these “Fred Saids” in their minds as bywords. In diverse situations one of his wise bites always popped up. This week’s thought is an example.

BWF Project is looking for men and women who want to share their story of dealing with “What’s Next” Fred’s writings on mentoring, networking, and persevering form a foundation for decision making. If you want to participate in this research, please contact us: Brenda@bwfli.com

Experience to Experiment

When in a difficult situation, it is helpful to establish an experimental mindset. You can negotiate and navigate the experience without falling into an emotional pit. For example, I once took a stop watch to the dentist’s office – not to see how much he was charging me per minute, but to see how much time I actually spent in pain. Without the stop watch to verify and validate, I would have said I hurt 50% of the time. But the objective data said it was a short time. I ran the watch only when I was in serious pain – four seconds! Yes, four seconds of tough stuff.

Another dental experience took awhile to fully turn into an experiment. I read about one of the tortures during World War II was conducting root canals without anesthetic. I decided to see if I would have endured. By the way, my dentist thought I was crazy and made me sign a disclaimer that it was in no way his suggestion! I made it through, but my family told me it took about 6 months for me to appear normal again!

We used this experimental syndrome to our advantage in working with a direct sales force whose big problem was door slammers. (This was in the days when door knocking was an accepted sales technique). We gave the sales force a chart of different door slammer personalities. For example, they had quick, loud, apologetic, indifferent, offensive, polite, indignant, etc. When someone slammed the door in their faces they simply checked the appropriate type box. By turning their experience into an experiment they turned personal rejection into an objective exercise.

I offered this system to a waitress at a local restaurant I frequented. The breakfast diner atmosphere drew a variety of patrons. I noticed several of the customers were gruff and even rude. I told her to make a card with columns and categories such as friendly, interested, polite, grumpy, and downright rude. One morning I sat at the counter listening as a customer berated her. When she came to refill my coffee I asked about it. “Oh, him? I was glad to see him because I was missing a downright rude and he filled my card!” She turned her experience into an experiment.

This week think about: 1) What am I facing that needs a shift from experience to experiment? 2) How does moving from subjective to objective make me more effective? 3) Who needs to hear about this system?

Words of Wisdom: “By turning experience into an experiment personal rejection can be turned into an objective exercise.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Indeed, if you call out for discernment – raise your voice for understanding.” (Proverbs 2:3 NET Bible)

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