Weekly Thought – February 18, 2020

Fred developed a reputation for his thinking on money. He taught his children money was “option…that it was a tool, not an idol.” He and Mary Alice lived out those principles. He was asked to address a large Baptist group of laymen on the topic of stewardship. Knowing “stewardship” usually connotes money, he covered three other major areas before even broaching the topic of money. This week’s email is an abbreviated version of his thoughts about giving.

Money Sense

When I was asked to speak on stewardship I know you expected the entire address to be on money, specifically giving money. However, the topic is much broader and I want to spend the first minutes outlining three other areas:
relations, identity, and talents. Then I will briefly give you my thinking on the stewardship of money.

I resent a great deal of the teaching on money. It strikes me that those people who refer to being “blessed” with money would be much better off to say “entrusted.” Those who talk about being blessed give me the feeling they feel God has chosen the right one and He couldn’t have made a better decision. I think it is an affront to the poor.

Likewise, I think it is wrong to teach that we can bribe God. Too many feel tithing puts them in a better position with God – that He owes them. I believe the tithe was a scheme to allow the rich to get out of significant giving. However, it is a very good starting point.

I have a good friend who pastors a well-to-do church. A member of his congregation made an appointment to see him with a “serious spiritual problem.” “Pastor, when I was poor I gave faithfully. As my wealth increased my struggle with giving the 10% increased. It has become a severe obstacle.” My friend responded immediately, “Let’s pray.” Eagerly the man bowed his head as the prayer began, “Father, you know how our brother here struggles with the problem of giving from such a high income. Would you please reduce it until he is comfortable giving 10% again?” At this point, the man jumped up, “NO! Pastor – that isn’t what I wanted,” as he hurriedly retreated.

When I was working 6 days a week making $6 I gave $.60. My income has increased many times that, but if I hadn’t given that $.60 I couldn’t give 6 figures now.

Let me give you three points on giving:

1) I never enjoyed giving until I started giving more than 10%. Recently I have been engaged with a friend who struggles with alcoholism. I learned about recidivism and staying sober for 20 years then relapsing. Those who fight for abstinence never reach the freedom of those who reach the joy of sobriety. Those who dutifully fight to give 10% may never enjoy it. Those who give out of love forget about the percentage, net/gross, or any other thing. They have the joy of giving.

2) Giving is the only drain pipe I know for our greed. I am convinced it is the answer to the greediness of our soul. We are fundamentally sinful and I believe God gave us the privilege of giving to detoxify our soul.

3) Giving is the ultimate freedom. My mentor Maxey Jarman gave millions of dollars to Christian ministries. At the end of his life he encountered severe financial difficulties. “Maxey, have you ever thought of the millions you gave away?” “Of course I have, but do you realize I never lost a dime of what I gave away – I only lost what I kept.” Many who are waiting to give money ought to be giving it right now. When we have it in our hands to give, that is the time. We don’t know how fast that money can be gone and we lose the privilege of giving.

This week think about: 1) When I think about stewardship, what immediately comes to mind? 2) How joyful am I in my giving? 3) What gifts should I be making now?

Words of Wisdom: “It strikes me that those people who refer to being ‘blessed’ with money would be much better off to say ‘entrusted.’”

Wisdom from the Word: “The one who loves money will never be satisfied with money, he who loves wealth will never be satisfied with his income. This also is futile.” (Ecclesiastes 5:10 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – June 18, 2019

Fred and Mary Alice devoted themselves to fiscal soundness. Growing up in economically depressed situations, they never outgrew their belief in financial responsibility. His thoughts on family budgeting fly in the face of incurring debt and hoping to out run the creditors.

Family Budgeting

Budgeting is done each year. I look back at the prior year, seeing how much money was spent on each category, then decided what amounts needed to be assigned for the present year. Planning always allows for outgo to be less than income. Items like savings, giving, and investment are integral parts of the overall budget.

We separated our needs from our wants from the very beginning. We needed safe transportation so we bought a used car, never a new one. We needed a comfortable home in a secure neighborhood, but never a luxurious one. Mary Alice fed us well, so we minimized our eating out.

Originally, at the beginning of our marriage we set our lifestyle to live on 80% of our income (which was $208 per month); 10% to savings and 10% to tithing. As the income grew we lived on a lower percentage and increased our savings, giving, and investment. Never did we live above our income.

We never bought on the installment plan because we wanted to make interest on our money, not pay it. We determined to pay cash for all luxuries. Mary Alice was given operating money for her part of the budget. She had a separate checking account she managed and I never controlled. We divided the budget into percentages, not dollar amounts. Mary Alice took 25% to run the household. My 75% covered all other expenses, including housing, transportation, insurance, savings, contributions, vacations, and my own personal expenses.

We focused on realistic needs, not wants. And even as our income increased we didn’t increase our spending, but rather increased our saving, giving, and investment. Eventually we lived on 50% of our income.

When our children were in college we bought a second home in Southern Pines, NC. Our friends were all shocked for they had no idea we were financially capable of that expenditure. Living at a 50% level provides freedom.
I want to say a word about my philosophy of money. Money is important, extremely important. I think of it like blood. I make blood to live, but I don’t live to make blood. Money is option. With it you have opportunities; without it your options and opportunities are greatly reduced. Money doesn’t determine your worth. The amount of money you have represents accumulation, not a measure of worth. Savings provide moral freedom. I knew as a young man how critical it was to have enough saved that I could walk away from a job that asked me to do something illegal or immoral. And finally, materialism is often an idol. Giving is the drain plug for greed.
My budget plan isn’t set in concrete. This is just the way Mary Alice and I did it. It worked well for us and I hope you find a philosophy that works well for you.

This week think about: 1) Do I have a philosophy of money? 2) What is my definition of enough? 3) How does money influence my lifestyle decisions?

Words of Wisdom: “And even as our income increased we didn’t increase our spending, but rather increased our saving, giving, and investment.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Your conduct must be free from the love of money and you must be content with what you have, for he has said, ‘I will never leave you and I will never abandon you.’” (Hebrews 13:5 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – April 24, 2018

Fred once counseled “You never really know a person until you have counted money with them.” His generosity was never trumpeted. He gave to specific needs, not naming opportunities. He once said one of his questions for heaven was why ministry and money were so closely connected.

Three Giving Points

Giving can be a complicated discussion, but there are three simple points I have found:

1) I never enjoyed giving until I started giving more than the tithe. Recently, I have been close to a dear friend with a drinking problem. In fact, he spent $50,000 (in 1980 dollars) in one clinic. He is a man of substance and international reputation. He has shared the material he has on the subject. One of the most intriguing studies shows that someone may be sober for 20 years then go back to drinking. I wondered about the reason. It was actually very simple: those who went back were staying sober by following the rules and consistently working at it. Those who reached the “joy of sobriety” were much more inclined to stay sober and rarely go back. Those who stress and strain to give a tithe never really enjoy it. Those who give out of love rarely get caught up in the “gross or net,” “tithe or offering” debates. They reach the joy of giving.

2) Giving is the only drain I know for greed. If we want to drain the greed out of our souls, I think we can only do it by giving. Since I grew up poor I understand that environment. And since our financial condition has greatly increased I can appreciate the dynamics of the monied. The sin of the poor is envy and the sin of the rich is greed. We hear much about the sin of greed, but I think envy is much less productive, giving only ulcers. However, Christians should not be known as greedy (or envious). Giving pulls the plug on the desire to excessively accumulate.

3) Maxey Jarman taught me money can be temporary. After he gave millions of dollars to missions worldwide his financial situation seriously deteriorated. I asked him if he ever thought about the millions he had given away. “Of course I have, but do you realize I never lost a dime of what I gave away – I only lost what I kept.” For those who are waiting to give money, this should be a great inspiration to give now.

I do not believe God is fundamentally interested in your money, but in your maturity. If you will show me your calendar and your checkbook I can write your biography. I will know how you spend your time and money. Where those resources are is where your treasure resides.

Some people try to substitute service for giving and others try to substitute giving for service. Neither can be done – both are required for maturity. You are being dishonest and Christian growth doesn’t come through a dishonest process.

This week think about: 1) How much joy do I find in giving? 2)What measure do I use to gauge my greed factor? 3) How loosely do I hold onto things?

Words of Wisdom: “I do not believe God is fundamentally interested in your money, but in your maturity.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Your conduct must be free from the love of money and you must be content with what you have, for he has said, ‘I will never leave you and I will never abandon you.’” (Hebrews 13:5 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – May 23, 2017

Fred’s practical approach gave him an objectivity that helped many. He rarely got caught up in seeing something from one vantage point – he liked to consider all angles. And, he didn’t make judgments about decisions (unless they were clearly un-Biblical or downright stupid!) His ability to look at giving through a neutral eye made him an excellent counselor.

Would you all pray for BWFLI as we begin our new initiative: the “What’s Next” conference in 2018 and the “What’s Next Roundtables”… both will explore mentoring, networking, and everyday living faith in depth.

Typology of Gifting

When I look at gifts I try to break them down into categories. Sitting on boards and being close to ministries has given me ample opportunity for this research. Money and ministry are inextricably tied together – often to the dismay of all concerned.

Giving is more than turning over ownership of an asset.

1) Gift as gift. The purest gift is the one that is anonymous. We know about the gift, but the giver is held in anonymity. We think of these not just in amount, but in motive. The classical Biblical example is the widow who quietly gave without throwing the coins into the metal container with pomp and noise. I find that it is sometimes easier to donate smaller amounts anonymously rather than the larger. My friend and mentor Maxey Jarman told of a fundraising dinner which gave people the opportunity to stand up and make open pledges. He said one gentleman stood up, introduced himself, his wife, named his business, gave its location, and then loudly proclaimed they were giving $5000 anonymously!

2) Purchase posing as a gift. In this situation the giver buys recognition or social position. I know of an extremely successful fundraiser who hosts a club for like-minded donors. The catch: You have to give $10,000 each year to belong to the club. I think it would be more accurate to think of this as an expense, rather than a gift. Being known as a member of this club sets one above others. The price of admission really isn’t about giving. Another friend promised a ministry $20million in stock, but kept ownership in order to vote the stock and control the corporation. Ironically, by the time his gift was received by the ministry the value had dropped from $50/share to $1.

3) Attention. This may be crass, but I know people who have discovered the power of being a potential major donor. They receive all the benefits and privileges of those who give but without actually donating. Sadly, too many organizations are afraid to offend such people with “great giving capacity” and treat them with deference.

4) Investment. Donors often speak of their giving in terms of ROI (return on investment). Kingdom work is often difficult to put through a metrics and measurements exercise. Do not misunderstand me. I want ministries to operate with the absolute best practices, for that is excellent stewardship. But there is an element to God’s work that doesn’t fit into a neat formula. I once asked a friend to give to a struggling minister doing excellent, but small, work in the inner city. He quickly informed me he didn’t give to small things. He gave only to those who had the capacity to change the entire system, not just a piece of it.

The philosophy of giving to get back is an example of investment thinking. The human multiplier effect fails when applied to God’s work. He does give an increase, but not because we have manipulated Him.

This week think about: 1) Where is my heart (and my head) when I give? 2) Who can I talk with about proper giving? 3) How can I be helpful to ministries as they think about money?

Words of Wisdom: “Kingdom work is often difficult to put through a metrics and measurements exercise.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Be careful not to display your righteousness merely to be seen by people. Otherwise you have no reward with your Father in heaven.” (Matthew 6:1 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – May 16, 2017

Fred was allergic to fluff. He didn’t appreciate those who tried to bamboozle him with lofty, spiritualized financial appeals. And, he didn’t want to be anyone’s “center of influence.” His gift of discernment gave him an objectivity which enabled him to give with insight and wisdom.

Giving to BWFLI is a way you can participate in the “stretching and blessing of the next generation of leaders… to the glory of God.” We ask for your help as we continue our campus work.

Intentions of the Heart and Purse

Not everyone gives for the same reason. Over the years I have known men and women who give high dollar gifts… and those who give the $5.00 donations. Billy Graham once said their ministry operated on the $5 gifts from men and women who stood with them in prayer.

Here are a few (certainly not an exhaustive list, but one that will get you thinking) I have noticed:

1) Tax deduction. “I prefer to give to the church rather than to the government.” Our tax laws currently favor charitable giving, but this may not always be the case. Giving as a tax strategy is usually more mental and emotional.

2) Peer pressure. A well-known CEO had the reputation of being a major fundraiser. In actuality, his gift were relatively small, but he had the ability to “suggest” to those who worked for him and did business with him that certain charitable organizations would be helped by their money. Often I get letters from non-profits listing their donors in descending monetary order. Some consultant told them most people like to do “what other people like them” do.

3) Emergency response. Another strategy is sending out SOS letters to donors under the banner of “we need your help NOW!” There are those who quickly respond to such pleas and feel they are jumping in to hold up the organization at a critical time. The problem with this is the sense we get when we see retail stores holding “going out of business “sales for years on end. Non-profits which hope to spur giving with SOS alerts risk creating doubt.

4) Legacy. Some foundations give when the understanding their name will be attached prominently to the gift. A fundraiser friend of mine always looks at “naming opportunities” when he first enters a facility. There is nothing wrong with giving to an organization and receiving public recognition. But one must be careful about the possibility of manipulation.

5) Obedience. If done out of respect and love, this is an excellent motive. If it is fear driven, then it is weak. A new Christian with great wealth was told by others he would be punished by God and stripped of his assets if he didn’t give super generously to the church. Obedient giving is not to obligate God but to obey Him.

6) Gratitude and love. Christian gratitude should start at Calvary and show itself in our consistent love. True love is extravagant, spontaneous, and natural.

7) God’s glory. When we give for His glory, we must be careful not to try to share the glory because God says He will not share with anyone. To give for His glory drives others to see Him for who He is.

This week think about: 1) What do I think about when I give? 2) How extravagant am I in my love for God? 3) What gives me the greatest joy in giving?

Words of Wisdom: “Obedient giving is not to obligate God, but to obey Him.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Each one of you should give just as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, because God loves a cheerful giver.” (2 Corinthians 9:7 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – May 9, 2017

Fred’s generosity covered financial support, but also the use of wisdom, time, and presence. His thoughts on giving were often sought by those who wanted to be good stewards. His ability to “sit loose to things” (a phrase he gleaned from Oswald Chambers) allowed him to give with great freedom.

Thank you for your ongoing support as BWFLI continues to impact Christian college and university campuses. Since our first event in 2008 we have brought 16 teams in contact with over 15,000 students. Your continued friendship through prayer and financial giving is greatly appreciated.

Giving With Joy

Money is an important scriptural concern. It shapes life in America as much or more than any other single item.

Here are several principles to consider for personal giving and also while leading others to give with integrity.

1) Giving may be harder than earning. A lifestyle of giving away money may be both difficult and dangerous. I say difficult because profitable stewardship requires a new and often more difficult discipline than making the money. It is dangerous because many temptations confront those with money to give.

2) Giving must move from duty to joy. The sheer administrative monotony of philanthropy can steal the joy. Administration is constant and often kills the delight. Freedom comes in crossing the line from duty to joy. Theologically, freedom comes in moving from works to grace.

3) Generous giving is a lifestyle. This involves more than the money or appreciated assets, techniques, or programs. It involves our spiritual maturity. How often am I willing to pray, “Lord, prosper me financially in proportion to my spiritual maturity?” What a snare if we try to bribe God with financial gifts to rationalize our failure to offer Him our spiritual gifts.

4) Motive is imperative. Biblical wisdom tells us “Out of the heart are the issues of life.” In the New Testament the story of Ananias and Sapphira warns us of wrong motives. As you remember, they claimed to donate 100%, but in actually held some back for themselves. They were greedy for credit and it cost them their lives. Their sin wasn’t in the reduced gift – it was the increased greed.

Obedient giving is not to obligate God, but to follow Him. We need to give – He doesn’t need the money. The glory which accrues to Him is the goal – along with our maturity.

This week think about: 1) How serious am I about my giving? 2) When I consider my stewardship do I just think about money? 3) What will increase my joy in giving?

Words of Wisdom: “Theologically, freedom comes in moving from works to grace.”

Wisdom from the Word: “And you, Solomon my son, obey the God of your father and serve him with a submissive attitude and a willing spirit, for the LORD examines all minds and understands every motive of one’s thoughts. If you seek him, he will let you find him, but if you abandon him, he will reject you permanently.” (1 Chronicles 28:9 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – November 15, 2016

Fred often told his children he and Mary Alice were not interested in leaving large sums of money to them. “I don’t want you to expect something that isn’t coming. Your Mother and I want to leave a legacy, not an estate.” Their children learned the value of saving, buying quality, and staying out of debt. Money was never the measure of a person’s value. He appreciated the options it brought, and respected the responsibilities, but never worshipped at the altar of wealth.

Money Talk

The truth about money has been known for a long time. Aristotle called it “barren” – not because it doesn’t bring benefits, but because the emotions it evokes are among the lowest on the hierarchy of values. These feelings don’t measure up to the nobler, finer emotions drawn out by patriotism and faith. The man or women whose greatest emotional energy is reserved for money knows nothing of the higher emotional life.

Money can bring fun – even happiness – but not joy if it is only “money for money’s sake.” It has no intrinsic ability to elevate the intellect or spirit. In fact, the love of gold often blocks the love for all else that is higher and more meaningful. How pale the struggle for wealth becomes when compared to the struggle for freedom, the search for truth, the war for principles, or the fulfillment of the noblest passions.

However, money is one of life’s greatest necessities. To disparage money per se is to demonstrate an ignorance of life and its rules. I often say that I think about money like I think about blood. I make blood to live – I don’t live to make blood. The same thing is true about money for me. I make money to live, but I certainly don’t live to make money.

In my view, money has always represented option. I have been poor and I have been financially comfortable – I prefer the latter. But having money and loving money are poles apart.

The options money make possible are part of its utility. Without it, there are limited choices; with it, choices are opened up. The interesting thing about money and choices is that having many options doesn’t necessarily mean we are capable of always making good choices.

And having money doesn’t necessarily create good character. When someone comments, “Do you know Joe? He’s worth millions!” I always respond: “He may have accumulated millions, but that doesn’t determine his worth.” The stewardship of great wealth requires discipline and the recognition that what you have isn’t the same as who you are.

This week think carefully about: 1) What is my relationship to money? 2) Do I have money or does money have me? 3) How can I use my financial resources to multiply God’s work?

Words of Wisdom: “Having money and loving money are poles apart.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Of what use is money in the hand of a fool, since he has no intention of acquiring wisdom?” (Proverbs 17:16 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – August 4, 2015

Fred took Oswald Chambers’ admonition to “sit loose to things” quite literally. He never allowed possessions to hold him hostage. There were few things that needed replacing if enough duct tape were properly applied.

Thank you for your consistent encouragement and support. Your words of gratitude help us in our work. Your illustrations of how Fred’s thoughts strengthened you gratify us and undergird the BWF Project.

Things Are Important

Practical excellence starts with our relationship to things. Most of our time, energy, and thought are involved with the material. So, we must ask ourselves: “Are our possessions hurting or helping us?”

Accumulation has a philosophy. Social historians look closely at a culture in relation to its artifacts. Understanding their material remnants tells a vivid story about the people and the way they lived. When there was written history, it is often eclipsed by the study of what the people accumulated. It is like the difference between saying and doing.

I often laughingly consider what archaeologists will piece together about us when they find piles of non-biodegradable butter tubs!

Ads tell us we can have it all! Sadly, too many buy into the idea that lacking the latest and greatest gadget labels one as a failure. I once read a sign saying, “If you can’t count it, it don’t count.” Foolishness. I tend to believe the more things I own, the more they own me. Ask my family about my different hobby phases and they will quickly tell stories of boating gone awry or temporary woodworking projects which turned into oddly permanent fixes.

Buying the good life is another mistaken idea about things. I have been poor and I have been not poor, and certainly not poor gives me more options. But it didn’t create a substantial life – character choices does that. I have seen way too many who thought the good life consisted of stuff, but they ended up mediocre, spoiled, rich brats. Growing up I saw men and women in the mill district of North Nashville who had very few things, but knew what good in life meant.

A word about money in the Christian world. It can gain someone recognition quickly. Big givers climb the pyramid of fame with jet speed. Ironically, some of those with reputations for giving hold tightly to their assets but promise them for future gifts. A very wise man once said, “There is no better job than being a big potential donor.”

Christians must hold the proper view of things. Scripture tells us much that is valued in this world will be burned up as “wood, hay, and stubble.” We cannot neglect the importance of things, but we must never put our trust in them. And of course, we must always “sit loose to things” as Oswald Chambers says, for they are never ours to keep, but just to manage.

This week think about: 1) How tied am I to my things? 2) What things in my life define me? 3) When archaeologists dig up my “things,” what story will they tell?

Words of Wisdom: “Growing up I saw men and women in the mill district of North Nashville who had very few things, but knew what good in life meant.”

Wisdom from the Word: “For what benefit is it for a person to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his life?” (Mark 8:36 NET Bible)

Weekly Thought – October 1, 2013

Fred’s financial wisdom and practice were well known.  One of his life-long friends commented recently on his sage counsel to a group of Dallas businessmen:  “Keep a year’s living expenses in savings and if possible live on half your income.”  “We were all shocked when he said that because most of the people we knew lived right up to the hilt supporting a high profile life style.  No one thought about reducing their standard of living to the one Fred and Mary Alice chose.”

“Money can be a tool or an idol” is one of Fred’s pithy sayings.  To those who give in the support of BWF, BWFLI, and the Weekly Thought, we want you to know it is most certainly a tool for the furtherance of this ministry.  Thank you.

Joy Through Financial Integrity

Those inundated by financial worries seldom exude a joyful attitude.  Our value system is exemplified by our relationship to money.  I laughingly told someone, “You never know a person until you count money with them.”  It brought a smile, but I was dead serious.  Scott Peck wrote about the underlying flaw in the American character – the failure to delay gratification.  We see this throughout our culture, but none so clearly as in our use of money.  Buying on time and using credit were unfortunate additions to our financial system.

We are so anxious for the fruit we pick it before it is ripe.  Oswald Chambers defined lust as “I must have it now” and how true that is of our instant satisfaction society.    (more…)