Free Time That Counts

Weekly Thought – October 28, 2025

Fred did not “goof off.” His mentor, Maxey Jarman once sent him a leather Eames chair – the ultimate in luxurious lounging. He pulled it out on to the back deck, reclined, and covered himself with a very large IBM blanket emblazoned with the word THINK. He had one of the children capture it on their Kodak Brownie camera and sent a photo to his mentor.

Free Time That Counts

Many times our leisure determines whether we are going to be mediocre or successful. A Christian should use leisure constructively to build, not to abuse. Weekend carousal is not an option. Volunteer work and healthy diversions are positive activities to include.

Leisure gives us time for reading, studying, traveling, and ministering. We are to invest our time, not spend it. I want my leisure time to pay dividends like any other good investment. An excellent hobby can provide relaxation and a bit of spice for life. Recreation should be re-creation. Our pleasures should restore our energy and create pleasant memories.

For many, recreation is just the opposite. For example, a nurse sat in the adjoining seat on my flight from Miami to Chicago. I asked her whether she was coming home or going to work. She said she was returning from a long weekend of partying in the islands. Her eyes looked like two red traffic lights. She was going home to her job so she could recuperate from her vacation. This sounds backwards, to me. As I see it, she made a big payment for this leisure time without hope of any future dividend.

My friend Jed Thompson uses his vacation time to work on a boat on the Amazon River, bringing with him dentist and technicians who volunteer their time. As well, they bring dental and medical supplies. They go up and down the area ministering to the local people – first to their health needs and then to their spiritual ones. Another family I know takes part of their summer vacation to go to the poorest areas in the world to serve Christ. These as well as those who participate in mission projects to erect buildings, put on vacation Bible schools, join in with Habitat for Humanity, and other groups like Samaritan’s Purse understand a way to invest their time and energy, not just spend them.

Service to others is a pleasure unknown to the selfish. In William Barclay’s prayer he asks for pleasure in his leisure. This only comes through the giving of oneself to something bigger.

This week look at your schedule and ask: 1) How well do I steward my leisure time? 2) What comes to mind when I think about the difference in investing and spending my time? 3) Who can benefit from my example of investing time wisely?

Words of Wisdom: “Service to others is a pleasure unknown to the selfish.”

Wisdom from the Word: “O LORD, restore our well-being, just as the streams in the arid south are replenished.” (Psalm 126:4 NET Bible)

The Last Word

Weekly Thought – October 21, 2025

Fred asked questions… Of others and of himself. Their son Fred, too, has the gift of questioning. This week’s thought is based on a conversation between the two of them.

The Last Word

When I was 28 I sat in a cemetery thinking about what I wanted my family to put on my tombstone. “He stretched others” came to mind and it hasn’t changed for my entire life.

Recently our son Fred asked me, “If you had only one more talk to make, what would be the subject?” Intriguing question, don’t you think? As we all face our mortality, we think more seriously about the impact of our speech and our example. We know our time to influence others is limited. Just as Fred asked me, I started asking others. I find it a worthy question.

I was then challenged to describe the process of answering the questions. A good friend said, “Everyone hasn’t thought about these issues as much as you have, Fred. Give me some help on processing my own answers.” So here are some questions that I thought about in forming my own.

1. What one fact do I feel has affected my life the most?
2. What one thing final thing would I say to my children and grandchildren?
3. What is the one statement that most deeply stirs me?
4. What is the one thing I could say that would affect my hearers the most?

Whether it’s one last speech to make, one last song to sing, one last book to write, or one last time around the family dinner table, it makes a difference when you know what you would want your final expression to be. In defining this, you find out a lot about who you are and what your life’s purpose it.

Editor’s note: (In case you were wondering about Fred’s answer to his son… “The nature of God and the nature of man: is man basically good with a tendency toward sin, or basically sinful with a possibility for good?” He added: “The answer to this question influences all human relationships and commerce.”

This week carefully consider: 1) What would I want my last words to be? 2) How would these words impact those around me and others to hear of my death? 3) Who is asking me good questions?

Words of Wisdom: “As we all face our mortality, we think more seriously about the impact of our speech and our example.”

Wisdom from the Word: “I have competed well; I have finished the race. I have kept the faith.” (2 Timothy 4:7 NET Bible)

Leading By Example

Weekly Thought – October 14, 2025

Fred chose his mentors and models carefully. From a young age he identified characteristics he wanted to emulate then attached them to men and women who personified them. Maxey Jarman, CEO of GENESCO served as an example throughout most of Fred’s life. He served as a teacher, spiritual guide, sponsor, and friend. Fred, in turn, dedicated himself to stretching others until his very last breaths. NOTE: On October 18, 1915, Mary Alice Swann was born. Hers was a life of dedication to the Lord, her family, and friends. Truly a woman of virtue.

Leading By Example

Role models personify who we would like to become. My wife, Mary Alice, had three women in her early life who laid out the path she wanted to walk. The first was her high school teacher, Miss Brown. She was stately, dignified, and totally ladylike. Mary Alice saw in her what she felt a Southern lady should be. Next was her Bible teacher, Mrs. Keane, who taught a group of young mothers to understand the Scriptures. Her cup overflowed with love and grace from the Lord to those young women. Mary Alice would say, “She is what a Christian should be.”

Then there was Miss Gordon, a tiny, immaculately groomed woman in her eighties. Although raised in wealth she spent a great deal of her time reaching prisoners for Christ. On occasion we would take her to church. Other times we would simply visit. We “sat and warmed our hands in the fire of her love,” as Gert Behanna’s words. Miss Gordon personified the quiet power of victory. When she died, it was a short step from here to heaven… much like Mary Alice’s own passing.

Mary Alice found in these three women role models for her adult life. They influenced her not by what they had but by who they were, just as Mary Alice influenced others by her own life.

Observation and identification are the important elements in role-modeling mentoring. I knew who I wanted to be and I identified those who personified those values. They didn’t have to be personal friends. In fact, when I was young they were not, but I observed them and knew they were the person I wanted to be.

Often the role model is unaware of his or her impact on another. Sometimes there is even little personal contact between the two. The role model can even be a Bible character or a public figure. Many choose historical figures as role models when they read of their lives and the choices they made.

Role models are a visual embodiment of our personal goals and directions. In them, you can see yourself as you create a pattern for living.

This week carefully consider: 1) Who has been a significant role model? 2) Who might be watching me for life clues? 3) What values are core for me?

Words of Wisdom: “Role models personify who we want to be.”

Wisdom from the Word: “Who can find a wife of noble character? For her value is far more than rubies.” (Proverbs 31:10 NET Bible)

Attention, Please!

Brenda’s Blog – October 7, 2025

Attention, Please!

“K-mart shoppers! Your attention, please. For the next 30 minutes there will be a ‘blue light special’ on aisle 3!” Those words would send people scurrying to see what bargains awaited them on aisle 3.

Camp directors hold up their hands with three fingers lifted to indicate campers have to the count of three to get quiet. In a leadership retreat recently, the host was a retired camp director who simply held up his hand to signal the break was over – all the non-profit executive directors and board members immediately responded.

Teachers flip the lights off and on to gain control and indicate all eyes are to be up front and all conversation is to end.

When I was a teenager and a date would last too long in the driveway (according to my Mom), the porch light would begin its “you better get out of that car and get in this house” routine. She knew how to get my attention (and probably that of my puzzled date).

In Luke 9 the doctor tells the story of being on the mountain with Jesus and experiencing the appearance of Moses and Elijah who joined Jesus. Peter was exhilarated. You could almost see him in his holy extroversion jumping around. “Let’s make tents for them!” Scripture says, “Peter didn’t know what he was saying.” Can’t you just see the fisherman babbling on and on?

What happens then? God speaks from a cloud which descended on them. “This is my Son, my Chosen One, listen to him!” In the South we would say, “Hush, Peter, God is talking to you!”

How does God get our attention? We don’t audibly hear Him as He speaks to us in a cloud. But His Word is powerful, intentional, and indeed purposeful. We can hear Him saying to us, “Be quiet, be still” in Psalm 46. We can read of the turbulent waves obeying Jesus as He instructs them to settle down. Our choppy waters are under His control.

And doesn’t He click lights on and off sometimes when we are wandering? The work of the Spirit gives nudges and sometimes not-so-gentle corrections to lead us to repentance. And especially in those times when we get too sure of ourselves and get ahead of Him, we recognize His revectoring.

The heavenly whistle blows and we line up if we are listening. The Word reorders our messy lives if we will only look to His plan. “Listen to Him!” Our loving heavenly Father calls us to obedience knowing true life is only in following Him.

The Providence of Coincidence

Weekly Thought – October 7, 2025

Fred lived a life of intentionality. He believed in the value of time and energy. Yet he chose to avoid a driven lifestyle. He encouraged others to enjoy seeing God’s plan unfold without trying to force His hand.

The Providence of Coincidence

I got a call from a men’s retreat I had led for several years on the West Coast. My physical condition kept me from being there in person, so they wanted to set up a phone call allowing me to say a few words and stay connected to the group. Over the many years this group and I had established a close relationship.

However, because the location was in the mountains there was serious difficulty with the phone connection. Even though they had one of the top professional soundmen working on the project, they were unable to access the venue’s phone lines. Without that they couldn’t set up the system to make the call go through.

Just as the technician was saying it was impossible to make the connection a man and his son walked in the door to attend the retreat. The man was there as a participant, but in his business life he was with the telephone company. They “happened” to drive up in his telephone truck and had all the tools and equipment needed to make this work. He even had the spurs in the truck which he needed to climb the telephone pole!

The next step was to talk with the next door neighbor asking for her patience and permission to disrupt her TV service during the phone call. She graciously invited the man and his son, offered them homemade lemonade – and even hugged them after hearing the story and wishing them well at the front door. Mission accomplished!

When they called me it was clear as a bell from both sides. So many things continued to happen that night “against all odds.” If you looked at the evening the numbers just didn’t add up. Even skeptics would have difficulty attributing it all to coincidence. I have seen them admit that certainly something greater than chance was at work. Years ago in looking at these situations I decided to coin a phrase “beyond arithmetic.” I used it to point to times when random and haphazard just don’t fit. When God connects the dots we can smile and simply say, “I knew that was you!”

This week consider: 1) How quickly do I recognize providence? 2) Where has God connected the dots in my life? 3) How can I train my family to look for God’s hand in their lives?

Words of Wisdom: “When God connects the dots we can smile and simply say, ‘I knew that was you!’”

Wisdom from the Word: “But Jesus looked at them and said, ‘With man this is impossible. But with God all things are possible.’” (Matthew 19:26 NET Bible)